She’s God’s Problem Now

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A young preacher was preaching his first funeral for an old Farmer whose wife had died.  In the distance, dark ominous storm clouds started to obscure the sunlight on the horizon.  He again looked down to his bible and continued on with the service. 

The farmers’ wife’s graveside service was just barely finished, when there was a massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance.

The little old man looked at the young pastor and calmly said, “Well, I think it is safe to say … she’s there.”

Spent most of the weekend here at the house, quietly doing research on my family tree.  Surprisingly I did discover, quite by accident, that some of my ancestors did swing from trees.  No they were not monkeys’ they were horse thieves in Kentucky.  

There is also a rumor floating around on FaceBook that “I am going to hell.”  Which is certainly not how I see it.  I have not ventured outside at all, in the first three days of the New Year.  Today was the first day out for me, that implies that I live a stationary (and often quite boring) lifestyle to me.  On top of all this, I have recently been diagnosed with “Anal Glacoma” which is a disease in older folks, where you cannot see your A** going anywhere soon.

Now here is something scary.  A new study found that more than 11 million people have quit Facebook in the last three years.  And unfortunately, none of them were your parents.

Wife sent me on a grocery run today.  I was at the checkout counter and the young girl looked at me and said “Paper or Plastic?”  I smiled and said, either one, I am bi-sackual.

She didn’t get it.

Also went to Lowe’s today for some items, noticed most of the workforce there is now different.  Much older crowd wearing the vest these days.  It appears they are no longer enforcing drug testing and have switched to Prostate Exams instead.  Wife sent me over there to get a shower massager thingy they had moved all of the shower stuff and I could not locate it then this little honey said to me, “Sir can I help you locate something?”

So I told her, “Yeah.  Shower massagers.”

She took me to them and then said, “Do you know what type you are looking for?”  And I said, “Nah.  She just said to get one that was soft, medium, and who needs a man?”  The assistant’s face turned a little red and she walked away.

I guess she didn’t get it either.

If you are on the highway this Holiday Season, here is how you can tell you have entered into the Sooner State … Oklahoma.  The wife gets cranky.  The kids start fighting in the backseat.  You feel the urge to siphon some gas.  Strange, but somehow I just know that you are all sitting there and snickering and saying “he is just making all of this up!”

Here is the nitty gritty boys and girls … I live here. 

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You have to be a little bit nuts to live here with the weather and all, then there is the political climate too.  Right now as you read this, “our elected morons are considering a law to make the wearing of a hoodie while committing an illegal act … Illegal.  And the fine is going to be $500.”

I hope you enjoy this day and of course your opinion is always welcomed.

As long as it agrees with mine.

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Violated In Cyberspace …

computer-duckHere lately, I have been devoting a lot of time and thought to the matter of Identity Theft.  Recently I found a lot of stuff on my computer that was NOT supposed to be here. 

Some ____ head on the other side of the world got access to my information processing appliance.  I have been hacked, electronically violated, and it did not set well with me.  Surely a serious concern in our day and age, the invasion of your space and the loss of one’s personal information to someone who is gonna be less than trustworthy with it.

It amazes me the attitude of some credit agencies and banking institutions concerning this important matter.  It is stolen information, but you, the consumer, are responsible for it.  To make matters even worse, they get their files hacked, and allow your personal information to be compromised and you are still held accountable for that too. 

At one time in my life, someone passed me a counterfeit $20 and they made ME make it good.  Something is not right when this is allowed to happen.

So far I.D. Theft has not happened to me, so I have never had to endure this long process of recovery, but I can assure you it is still on my mind a lot of the time.  These days I am very stingy with my personal information because of it, to the extent of taking my mail to town to mail, just in case.

Which presents another question. 

If someone was to steal your information and assume your identity, why is it that you cannot just assume a totally new I.D.?  Now if that were the case that would certainly be a plus for me. 

Would they take down all those old pictures at the Post Office?  I will check into this and get back to you soon. 

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Back to Who I Is …

Jus Sayin 1218

recent-shots-006I am desperately trying to stop drinking coffee and it aint easy

The first cup of coffee in the morning is supposed to be the best
But with old age, that is something that goes away too
The first cup of coffee in the morning now has two scoops of Poop-Fairy-Dust (Laxative) which makes it kind of bitter and unpleasant.

Doesn’t help the withdrawl headaches either.

You ever wonder what your dog is thinking when you follow him around with a pooper-scooper and then promptly reach down while it is still warm
and retrieve his business and put it in a bag.

Do the people who shop at WalMart have mirrors in their homes
Why is it a barrel of oil drops two dollars on the open market
but a gallon of gasoline only nine cents, anyone notice that
NASA is reporting that the planet Mars has methane gas
which cannot be blamed on me,
I live 252 miles due east of Amarillo.

Don’t believe these people that are spreading the rumor that says I molested sheep outside Bozeman Montana in 1978 while on vacation … It’s a lie.
And yes …  I still want my Father’s Day Card.

Speaking of Fathers (Nice blend huh?)  

Do you think that Cliff’s wife on the Cosby Show was a lawyer because of a deep seated emotional stirring that the need for a good attorney in the future might be an imperative in his life.
Isn’t life ironic. 

Does anyone have the contact number for Dr. Phil
the voices in my head are screaming for answers and we don’t have a clue
They want to ask him who has the best cellular service and plan for us
and of course, where they find the seeds to plant seedless watermelons
Dr. Phil is always saying he is a “mandated reporter” so I figure that means
he has to answer my question by law …  (and yes, I know there is no such thing as a “good” attorney).

Jus Sayin

WordPress.Com Mumbo Jumbo

Hi there,

Can you please provide a link to the post that is having this problem? Does this happen with all new posts?

Thanks,
Heather
Automattic | WordPress.com

So I patiently outline and provide specific items that need to be addressed. I answer all questions to the best of my knowledge.

—– Original Message —–

From: “Heather @ WordPress.com” <support@wordpress.com>

To: <donsmith@cox.net> Sent: Monday, July 14, 2008 8:32 PM Subject: [WordPress #FOA-595595]: disappearing posts.

Hi Don, Thanks for your updates on this issue. We’ve created a new FAQ to help clarify how the tag surfer works and potential reasons why posts may not display there. One or more of these items is likely the cause for the issues you’re encountering:

http://faq.wordpress.com/2008/07/15/my-post-doesnt-show-up-in-the-tag-list-what-gives/

Also note that multiple attempts to push a post to the top of the tag surfer by changing the publication date could also be the cause.

Thanks,
Heather
Automattic | WordPress.com

Well, that is a nice theory, but it doesn’t hold water.  First, I am not using the tag surfer to locate the posts, I just go to the category and look for the post, it is there and then it is not there.  Second, it often doesn’t post at all.

There is no reason for it to post some of the material 17 posts down in the page, displaying it some three weeks later, AND NOT DISPLAYING IT ON THE DAY IT WAS PUBLISHED, it should in my opinion go to the top of the page, not buried deep within it.

At the very least …. It ought to go somewhere.

Somehow I just “knew that this would work out to be ME instead of wordpress” and I am not surprised at all.  First I am told that it was because there were too many tags on the posts, so I cut the tags back, and the problem remains.  Now it appears that I am the problem?  What a load of crap that is.

As for “pushing it with multiple dates” that is BS too.  I was just trying to make it appear, hell it wasn’t even showing up most of the time.  It is a sorry deal, no two ways about it and “Frequently Asked Questions” is not a solution it is a cop out.
To: <donsmith@cox.net>

Sent: Tuesday, July 15, 2008 8:32 PM  Subject: [WordPress #FOA-595595]: disappearing posts.

Hi Don,

Tag pages show the best, most recent posts – not all of them. To ensure that future posts continue to show up on tag pages, please follow the guidelines on http://faq.wordpress.com/2008/07/15/my-post-doesnt-show-up-in-the-tag-list-what-gives/

Again, the more relevant the post is to the tag, the more likely it is to show up in the listings. You may want to assess the relevance of the “recent” tag in relationship to your post’s content.

Thanks,
Heather
Automattic | WordPress.com

Recent: 1. having happened not long ago: having happened or appeared not long ago the recent birth of her daughter. 2. modern: from current times or the very near past recent political trends

Random: 1. without a pattern: done, chosen, or occurring without a specific pattern, plan, or connection random testing for drugs. 2. lacking regularity: with a pattern or in sizes that are not uniform or regular a wall constructed of random stones

I know the definition of the words, thanks. That didn’t help a bit. It must be nice to just keep dancing all around the problem, that way you don’t have to admit you have a problem, and heaven forbid, try and fix it.

“Tag pages show the best, most recent posts – not all of them.” Your words not mine.

Why even have a page if you are not going to post it? Who determines what “the best is?”  When you post something (best or otherwise) and it “buries it 17 deep” that is not recent, that is plain pathetic.

When a post goes up, and then after a period of time, disappears, but the others remain, that tells me that YOU have a problem, and it is NOT the author of the post. I also find it a little coincidental, that after squealing like a stuck pig, four out of five of my posts actually survived one day and that only one disappeared yesterday.

That has to be some kind of new wordpress.com record, might want to put that on the global dashboard tomorrow.

I will admit that in the beginning because of my lack of understanding, I may have caused some of the problems with the tags (I had way too many) and that could have been part of it. In my defense I will admit to seeing multiple postings here with more than the 12 tags, I have counted as high as 18 on one post.

I have actually seen 25 posts in order by one author, which is tantamount to spam, but it is evidently tolerated.  But that is a completely different issue. My problem remains, after making the necessary corrections the problem is still here, so I seriously doubt it is anything on this end of the line.

I write about life, recent happenings in America or where I live, I have occasionally have a random thought on subjects that are affecting me and those I know.  So you tell me where to put it? You tell me how to tag it?  (And your “first choice” doesn’t count)

You ask for “specifics” and when you are provided with them, you choose to ignore them or blow it off. But this latest answer here (or non answer), this is just verbal masturbation and nothing more.

I might as well be talking to robots.

So Heather at support (which in this case is laughable at best):

Hi There.  I have posted 282 posts on this site since March of this year, and have received 360 comments from over 10,191 people around the world.  Which I believe is a noteworthy accomplishment, considering I was “doing it all wrong.”  Now I am going to post this and hopefully it will go somewhere ……. Where ever that might be?

Now you can go back to your personal emails or video games and forget about the rest of it. Don’t send me any more correspondence with your “suggested reading lists” which are basically useless.

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Tags: Please Read. Please Post. Please put this three pages deep so no one will ever see it. Please remit your annual $30 payment for a crappy system that refuses to work in the order or fashion that it promises.

DS

Real World 101

DON’T USE A RECENT TAG OR AN OKLAHOMA TAG IF YOU WANT YOUR POST READ, BOTH CATEGORIES ARE EATING POSTS AND WORDPRESS.COM SEEMS TO WANT TO DO NOTHING ABOUT IT.  POST IT SOMEWHERE ELSE ….

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THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: “If life is so good, then why is it, that we often feel so badly?”

What do teenagers of all income groups have in common? A love of money.  Once a year, the Harrison Group, a marketing consulting company in Connecticut, surveys 1,300 teenagers 13 to 18 across the U.S. about their financial attitudes. This year’s study included an in-depth look at those raised in affluent households, those with more than $150,000 in annual income.

Seventy percent of all the teens surveyed said they wanted more money. Half agreed that money “may not buy happiness, but it comes close.” And 34%, up from 29% in 2004, said “it is hard to be truly happy without a lot of money.”

Not surprisingly, teens raised in more-affluent households had distinctive spending habits and brand preferences. For example, more than 70% of them said they love luxury-car models such as Mercedes-Benz, BMW and Lexus.

The study also noted that “Inner-city kids are taught more about sex and drugs and violence than how to take care of money,” the article goes on to say. “The poor kids were fearful because they didn’t know how it (personal money management) worked, and they didn’t want to take risks.”

It appears that in America … “Wealthy people value time; poor people value stuff.”  In our case, Cup Cake and I, have too little of the first, and way too much of the second.

At the core of the problem, could be the message that we send our children.  Chicago’s public-school system recently has awarded a brand new car to a “12 year old girl, as a reward for her perfect school attendance record.” Now how sad is that?  She cannot legally drive the $15,000 Dodge Caliber for another four years, and critics question whether such lavish gifts send the wrong message to children.

Duh, you think so?

There are some schools of thought, at least my old man had one, and it was, “learning and achievement” were rewards in themselves.  If you can do simple math, if you are able to read this, then be thankful for your education.

Meanwhile the dork that runs the Chicago Public Schools said that this prize was a vital weapon in the fight against truancy and that they were not going to (ever) apologize for that.  My dad had a prize for truancy; it was called a trip to the woodshed.

Meanwhile out on the left-coast, a student at Tesoro High School in affluent Orange County, Kali-fornyuh, was charged with 69 criminal counts for allegedly hacking into the school computer and changing all of his bad grades to A’s.  When asked the reason for his criminal behavior the kid replied that he just wanted to make sure he got into a good college.

Back in the day, when I brought my report card home, and it was all A’s, I would be automatically suspect for sure.  Just didn’t happen.  I remember one day my Dad said, “What you get on your report card?” and I replied, “I dunno, I think it is a Full House … 3 D’s and 2 C’s.”

That dog didn’t hunt either.

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Weekend Smokers

Olympia Washington has determined that 24 ounces of medical marijuana should be the two month supply for approved medical marijuana patients.  They had originally suggested “35” ounces for a bi-monthly supply.  Now let me see, “16” ounces in a pound right?

These guys must really be sick puppies.

Best not go skinny dippin’ in Wyoming this summer.  Officials there are reporting outbreaks of parasite-caused skin disorder in the area outside Boysen State Park.  The condition, also called swimmer’s itch, is caused by a worm like parasite that can burrow into the skin, causing a tingling, burning, itching sensations as well as small reddish pimples and blisters.

Talk about giving a totally new meaning to the phrase “off shore drilling” this is it boys & girls.  Now think about it, you are swimming totally nude in a lake, completely nakid as they say in Crawford Texas, and this thing decides to swim up your … man, talk about the eeeeck factor?

Find yourself a good book, get in the shade and sip some lemonade.  The price of diesel in this country continues to inch toward the $5 benchmark.  The oil companies seem to have effectively spread “Annal Glaucoma” across the land (This a new petroleum induced condition where you cannot see your butt going anywhere.  There seems to be no cure at the present time.  Sorry).

E-Mail of the week: 

So, I was talking to this little girl Catherine, the daughter of some friends, and she said she wanted to be President some day.   Both of her parents, liberal Democrats were standing there with us – and I asked Catherine – ‘If you were President what would be the first thing you would do?’

Catherine replied – ‘I would give houses to all the homeless people.’

‘Wow – what a worthy goal you have there, Catherine.’  I told her, ‘You don’t have to wait until you’re President to do that, you can come over to my house and clean up the entire dog poop in my back yard and I will pay you $5 dollars. Then we can go over to the grocery store where the homeless guy hangs out, and you can give him the $5 dollars to use for a new house.’

Catherine (who was about 4) thought that over for a second, while her mom looked at me seething,and Catherine replied, ‘why doesn’t the homeless guy come over and clean up the dog poop and you can just pay him the $5 dollars?’

And I said, ‘Welcome to the Republican Party’.

Things are getting bad, Nevada Brothels are reporting that the truckers are not stoppin and the brothel owners are get this, offering gas cards and other promotions after seeing business decline.  Now if you are a hooker in a brothel, what possible kind of “other promotions” could you have to offer?

Business is down some 25% since a year ago.  They may have to hold a yard sale or something, get yo’ camera ready Art! (Art is our 911-highly-mobile-Reno-Correspondent)

Burger King (in the U.K.) this week served up burgers made of Wagyu Beef and enhanced with white truffles and shallot-infused mayonnaise.  The proceeds from the $190 burgers went to the charity Help a London Child.  No word on how much the “barf bags” were which surely would have been necessary after eating this concoction of whatever it was?

So another win/win situation.  Some poor sucker purchases this thing and gets a “charity write off” on his taxes, Burger King gets “worldwide free advertising” and finally, I suppose someone gets a bonus for dreaming up this farce.

I knew it would happen, I just knew, before the week was over, I would hear of some idiot doing something dumb on the 4th of July.  Here it is.

“A Alabama man is in jail tonight after setting off fireworks inside his apartment. The fireworks set the building on fire and caused extensive damage to the ten-unit building.”

Investigators say 25-year-old Shawn Dennis suffered several burns and was treated at a local hospital, before he was arrested and charged with arson. “Dennis is now in the County Jail where he’s being held on $5,000 cash bail.”

Isn’t it wonderful when a man decides to celebrate July 4th like everybody else, with fireworks.

Of course, most people don’t set off the fireworks inside their apartment.  You really have to have a sense of humor to live in the South.

No really.

Have A Great Weekend.

000

Sin Taxed …

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: If you live in the State Of Oklahoma … “At all times, wear your dentures, and never wave at the Video Camera.”

Woke up this morning, feeling absolutely terrible, stuck my finger and the sugar is out of sight again, digits are snake-bit high ….. No wonder I feel hammered. But boy the Fried Rice and the Almond Cookies last night, they were really good.  Today I have to pay the price.

As I understand it, motorists are still in trouble.  Earlier I reported that more and more folks are being towed in by wrecking services now with the rising price of fuel. AAA reports that tow-ins are increasing, as American’s are buying less motor fuel and leaving their tanks close to empty. AAA has reported a “doubling of calls” from stranded motorists needing a tow.

Some media outlets are reporting people pawning off personal items, in order to purchase fuel. Theft of some metals is up nationwide, and the scrap business has reached new highs. Forget the pawnshops, you may have a good source of extra cash right there in your own home.

Young audiophiles are rediscovering vinyl records, which many deem to have “better sound and quality” over CD’s and MP3 players. Artists such as Elvis Costello and Radio-head are releasing alums on vinyl, and sales of turntables have spiked about 500% every year for the past four years. Even my own grandson (14 yrs old) came over the other day and raided a box of old wax out in the garage and took several home with him.

So dust off that Arrow Smith, Pure Prairie League and The Dead, if you can bare to part with them, you could be sitting on a Goldmine. I would be willing to part with just about most all of it except my Lawrence Welk Remembers Woodstock Album, that is a keeper, I cannot sell that one.

A pack of smokes in New York has gone to $10 per pack ($100 a carton) yesterday as they again applied a sin tax to some poor sucker. The new plan in New York is to have the weak and the addicted take care of the majority I guess.

Why people continue to smoke at these prices amazes me, pack of Marlboro’s is over $4 in Oklahoma now. Having given up smoking some twelve years ago, I took a calculator and figured out my daily consumption rates on tobacco. Then I took the current price of a pack of Marlboro’s (my smoke of choice, which is now over $4.77 per pack) doing the math as my daddy used to say, it appears that someone owes me about $31,400 to be exact.

Where did the money go? I wonder why I don’t have that exact amount in my change drawer or a secret account at the bank?  I had this friend, a guy, who didn’t smoke.  He was adamant about it, he would not allow anyone to step inside his apartment that smoked.  But if he met some chick he wanted to bed, he would allow her to barbecue a goat in the living-room!

Not long ago, I asked this cute little girl, why in the world was she smoking. She said that it helped with her weight problem. Which I suppose is correct. In the end, it will cure your weight problems; smoking will cure ALL of your problems eventually.

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