Email Of The Week (0301)

Found this in my mailbox the other day and thought I might share it with you.

Dear Employees:

As the CEO of this organization, I have resigned myself to the fact that Barrack Obama is our President and that our taxes and government fees will increase in a BIG way.  To compensate for these increases, our prices would have to increase about 10%.

But, since we cannot increase our prices right now due to the dismal state of the economy, we will have to lay off sixty of our employees instead.  This has really been bothering me since I believe we are family here and I didn’t know how to choose who would have to go.

So, this is what I did. I walked through our parking lots and found sixty ‘Obama’ bumper stickers on our employees’ cars and have decided these folks will be the ones to let go.

I can’t think of a more fair way to approach this . They voted for change… I gave it to them.  I will see the rest of you at the annual company picnic …….

Not that I am a big fan of Obama, but there is a better letter.  (There is always a better letter)

Frank walked into his new office, just as the current owner was vacating it.  He exchanged pleasantries with the unlucky fellow who has just been canned and wished him well.  The poor guy who was being fired, handed him three envelopes and said to him, “You are going to need these.  Put them in your desk until the appropriate time.”  

And then he left.

Frank placed the three envelopes in his desk and gave them little thought.  Time went by and things did not go so well for Frank in the new position, and soon the boss called him to the office.  Frank sat there and sweated, he was anxious, he was worried, what could it be?  

At that time he remembered the envelopes.

He opened the drawer and pulled them out.  They were labeled one, two and three.  He put two and three back in the drawer and quickly opened envelope #1.  There he found a slip of paper and written on it he saw ….. “Blame it on the economy.”

So when he went to the office to see the boss, that is what he did, he blamed everything on the rotten economy and slow business.  The boss seemed okay with that, and he went back to his assigned duties.  A little time goes by and then again, the dreaded phone call and the mandatory trip to the bosses office and the “how come chair?”

Again Frank reaches into the drawer and hastily grabs envelope #2, he rips it open, this time he discovers a slip of paper that reads …. “Blame it on the employee’s.”  So this time, he laid it all on the employee’s and that seemed to satisfy his boss and things again, returned to normal.

Now if you are following the story, then you know that all this time things have been going downhill and of course, it erodes to a point where Frank gets called to the office.  Quickly he reaches into his desk drawer to fetch the last envelope, #3 and just as quickly, rips it open, he unfolds the piece of paper and it reads … “Prepare three envelopes.”

Everyone has a story … Try this,

Walking Ten Miles

just to interview for a job.

Have a great weekend, we will see all of you on Monday.


Here is what folks have been reading this week at Creative Endeavors:

Home page / Archives  
Bikinis (The reason men are pigs)  
A New Look  
Clear Blue Sky  
The Worry Tree  
Once Upon A Time There Was A Father  
Take Your Pick  
Swimming Alone  
12 Days Of Christmas (audio)  


imgres“For to be free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others.”

Nelson Mandela

You can tell the measure of a society by the way they treat their criminals.  Beside’s our lousy economy, we as a nation, also lead the world in prisons and citizens that we have locked down.

Every now and then you will read where in a rush to judgement, we send someone off to our particular version of living hell on earth, without batting an eye, and at the same time, assuring his innocence or guilt beyond a reasonable doubt.  

I am reading an article in the LA Times, where a Texas man has been released from prison after twenty-five years of being wrongly convicted of beating his wife to death.  He has been found to be innocent of the crime by way of DNA evidence and another man will now stand trial for the crime. (Texas also leads the nation in capitol punishment and has even executed a retarded man)  

His trial was two full years before DNA evidence became courtroom-validated and was found acceptable for use in courts in this country as a possible form of un-fallible evidence. 

Think about it, twenty-five years of your life spent behind bars for a crime you did not commit.  


In the interview he was surprisingly not bitter.  He said it wasn’t all that bad after the second decade, but his overall picture of the trial and subsequent lock-down was “scary, very scary.”  I have also heard of another guy in New Jersey that had the same problem.  

His conviction was for fifteen years, and he sued New Jersey for lost wages and suffering, and eventually won the settlement, which was paid to him “less money paid to his wife for welfare during the period,” which New Jersey said “they were entitled to.”  Which is kind of ironic, they take the man from the family unit and lock him up, leaving the wife to fend for herself with no marketable skills and then claim that they are owned monies for this. 

 What a country.

It’s as if you are waking up from a very bad dream, a dream most of us will never have a hint of what it would be like to have to endure something this cruel and unusual.  Think of Nelson Mandela  all those years locked up in an African prison for what, for nothing more than asserting that he was a free man.  

 It just boggles the mind, at least for me, it does.

Then there is the “what if?” factor.  Where circumstance comes into play, and you get sucked down the modern day version of the rabbit hole.


At one time or another, I suppose we all wonder who it is that we might be, where it was that we came from, why am I here?  It is only natural in the progression of life to wonder about these things.  

But what if you are shut down in some state or federal prison for no earthly reason, then what?  When you have no logical explanation of your dire circumstance.

Let’s try another one shall we?  

What if you slipped in the shower or fell down some stairs, and when you came awake, you did not know who you were?  How would you handle that?  

Your entire memory is wiped clean by a simple pit fall or stumble.  So one day, you are the CEO of a major corporation and you slip in your office bathroom in Phoenix, Arizona, and wake up in a hospital.  Without a clue of who, what, where, when and why?

 Kind of scary eh.

So to make matters even worse, when the doctor looks at you and says “What is your name?” you have no working knowledge of the word name and you do not know its meaning.  

When introduced to your wife of some 30 years, you do not know what the word “wife” means.

What would you do if you found yourself in this predicament, with untreatable form of memory loss or worse locked down for a major portion of your life.  “What would you do, when you look around the room and survey your world, and nothing, absolutely nothing, registers with you, what then?  When you step outside into the sunlight and find a totally New World?


Twenty-five years, is a long time.  What do you tell yourself when you do the math,

and your life comes up short, 9,125 days?

Who picks up the tab for that?




Its only weird if it doesn’t work.  Like most of America, I watched the Super Bowl yesterday.  It seemed strange for a number of reasons, one being it was the fiftieth Super Bowl, and that somehow just does not seem possible?  As I have been around for quite a few of them personally, and the numbers, well, they just sort of always add up not necessarily in my favor these days.

Another thing that was different is this.  I hard drived the game (DVR’ed it) and did not actually watch the game as it unfolded and the drama increased, we watched the last three minutes of the contest and that was it.  As I am not a great football fan anymore, I taped it in order to see the commercials, which I now consider to be the best part of all of it.


Funny how habits sort of get ingrained into a person.  I am so used to “skipping the commercials” and watching the main body of the program.  Now for this event, I had to reverse the procedure, and it took some getting used to.  I finally managed to master it, but it was tough, that and seeing the Niner’s lose, I wasn’t all that keen on that either.

This is a pretty good video, it wasn’t on the Super Bowl, but you will find it amusing.

Shopping at the Costco Fish Market.

The Great American Free lunch:  The Senate Budget Committee reports that in fiscal year 2011, between food stamps, housing support, child care, Medicaid, and other benefits, the average US household below the poverty line received $168 (my note, 7 days a week) in government support.  What’s the problem with that much support?  

Last time I even bothered to check, the median household income in America was just over $50,000 per year, which averages out to $137.13 per day.  To put it another way, being on welfare now pays the equivalent of about $30 an hour for a 40-hour week, while the average job pays $25 an hour.  And then there is the person who works who has to pay taxes, which drops the pay to $21 an hour.  

It is no wonder that welfare is now the biggest part of the budget, more than Social Security or defense.  And why would anyone want to get off welfare when working pays $9 an hour less.

Another great thing about welfare versus working … No drug screening for anyone, just sign up and wait on the money to come rolling in.  For more of the report you can find it here.


Crayon’s before bullets:  While I am up here on my soapbox.  One of our American Hero’s was taken out this weekend by a gun, and there is more negative news about firearms in the media.  It all seems so far fetched out of of sync for me.  Our so-called cures for societal problems are directed at the symptoms rather than the causes. We can’t keep throwing money at a broken education system, or its victims. We can’t guarantee raising well-behaved, normal children in broken, drug-dependent or parentless families.

Taking guns from law-abiding citizens will only deepen the lawlessness of criminals. Taking God out of our schools and society, and legitimizing every type of deviant moral, physical and psychological behavior, dooms American society to a continued descent into more violence, self-centered behavior and immorality. Society won’t improve until America returns to her roots.

If we truly want to solve most of American society’s problems, return America to its founding principles. Otherwise, we commit societal suicide.

Munday-Munday:  I got those wake up its early, wash behind your ears they’re dirty, eat your eggs and oatmeal, rush to work blues.  I just do not do Monday’s all that well anymore … Most folks believe heart attacks occur on Monday, but the majority of them knock you down on Wednesday, not the first of the week as erroneously presumed.  And they hit at 10 A.M. (or thereabouts) quick check your watch.

That is one of those mysteries of life, you know things that do not add up.  

Why is it that every black guy in prison in the movies is named “Red?”  That would be one.  How come some guy born in Kansas City that happens to be black is now called an African American?  He aint African anything.  Why does the late Patrick Swayze look both ways before crossing the street in the movie Ghost?  I mean hell, he is a ghost, an errant cab or a delivery truck cannot hurt him.  Strange doin’s on a Monday.

 One more and I am outta here … If evolution is true as they say, then why do Mother’s only have one set of hands?

Think about it ….


Email Of The Week [020213]

Elected Officials Are Fundamentally Dishonest

To the Editor:

This letter was forwarded to Barack Obama, John Boehner, Chris Murphy, Dick Blumenthal, Elizabeth Esty, and Harry Reid

I live in Sandy Hook, CT. My family and close friends weren’t harmed on December 14. That day impacted 26 families with an indescribable, staggering pain and anguish. For most of Sandy Hook, it merely affected us with an inescapable intensity of sadness and grief.

Gun control has long been a focus of many in this country. Though I’m not knowledgeable of all the nuances of the Second Amendment, based on the Founding Fathers’ circumstances, it had far more to do with enabling the citizenry to protect themselves against tyrannical government than against local psychopaths. It is about providing a balanced firepower so when King George’s successor came knocking on your door, you could fight back. Government today is no less inclined to abuse its authority than it was then. Based on the absurd and ongoing power grab that is present day Washington, it’s as threatening as ever.

That so many of you view the NRA with its resistance to further restrictions on firearms as intransigent lunatics has far more to do with how you conduct yourselves in office than it does with the NRA’s actions.

You in public office are fundamentally dishonest people. You lead lives of deception at every turn, structuring your lives as comfortably as you can while governing with an indifference and arrogance that is absolutely maddening. When the country is reeling from financial disaster, you waste a trillion dollars on a health care bill we can’t afford and you’ve never read. You claim it’s critical because health care costs are killing this country… no they’re not, you are! You are killing this country. You endorse the ongoing slaughter of millions of unborn children and whine when terrorists are water boarded.

You can’t lecture us right in Newtown High School about not doing enough to keep our children safe, while simultaneously slaughtering the unborn. You fabricate the intense, media laden drama of the fiscal cliff and lack the courage to do anything about truly reforming the obscene gluttony of government. You know you’ll be out of office before the bill comes due… you don’t care and have no integrity nor honor.

You lie whenever and wherever you need to to move forth your agenda. Were you able, you would purge the US of guns… every last gun in the country, if you could. So please forgive Wayne LaPierre and those of us who don’t trust you as far as we can spit. You’re a dishonest lot, motivated by a distorted worldview. If mass murder prevention were truly your goal, you would welcome armed security wherever needed. It is outrageous that we protect our money with far more firepower than we protect our children.

I have never owned a gun, nor wanted to as intensely as right now. You’ll stop restricting guns when only you have them.

Brendan Duffy

4 Chestnut Knoll Drive, Sandy Hook January 8, 2013

The Last Word (Not Really)

01-22-13 Inauguration

Really Bad Joke:  I noted that Obama used Martin Luther Kings’ Bible on the swearing in ceremony the other day.  This guy has trashed more bible parables and guidelines than any other guy in recent history.  Nothing is sacred, now Kings’ bible has been thrown into the mix, instead of a treasured piece of history, it is now relegated to nothing more than another prop in this circus show.

Just In Time:  Today I received my Fiscal Cliff Survival Pack from the White House.  It contained a parachute, a ‘Obama Hope & Change’ bumper sticker, a ‘Bush’s Fault’ poster, a ‘Blame Boehner’ poster, a “Tax the Rich’ poster, an application for unemployment, an application for food stamps, a prayer rug, a letter of assignation of debt to my grandchildren and a machine to blow smoke up my a**.  All directions were in Spanish.

 Keep an eye out.  Yours should arrive soon..

Not Much Better In Canada:  The Alberta Department of Labor, Division of Labor Standards claimed a small rancher was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an agent out to investigate.

AGENT: I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them. 

RANCHER: Well, there’s my hired hand who’s been with me for 3 years. I pay him $200 a week plus free room and board.

Then there’s the mentally challenged guy.

He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here.

He makes about $10 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of bourbon every Saturday night so he can cope with life.  He also sleeps with my wife occasionally.

AGENT: That’s the guy I want to talk to – the mentally challenged one.

RANCHER: That would be me.

It is all in the way you think:  Whew! What a relief to learn this  …  Ever walk into a room with some purpose in mind, only to completely forget what that purpose was?  Turns out, doors themselves are to blame for these strange memory lapses. Psychologists at the University of Notre Dame have discovered that passing through a doorway triggers what’s known as an event boundary in the mind, separating one set of thoughts and memories from the next. Your brain files away the thoughts you had in the previous room and prepares a blank slate for the new locale.  It’s not aging, it’s the **** door! 

Thank goodness for studies like this.  I had erroneously believed that my trigger was in my rear.  No seriously, I would walk all the way up to the barn, stand there like some kind of lost goose, and never figure out what it was that I walked up there for.  Then I would walk all the way back to the house, and sit down … And pow!  It came to me!  So naturally I figured my trigger was in my rear, turns out it wasn’t there at all.

The Last Word: In a recently held linguistic competition held in London attended by the best in the world, Samsundar Balgobin, a Guyanese man from Bachelors Adventure, was the clear winner with a standing ovation lasting over 5 minutes. His final question was this … How to explain the difference between COMPLETE and FINISHED in a way that is easy to understand. Some say there is no difference between “these two words”.

Here is his answer which made him receive an invitation to dine with the Queen who decided to call him after the contest. He won a trip to travel the world in style and a case of 25 year old Eldorado rum for his answer. 

His astute answer:   “When you marry the right woman, you are COMPLETE. And when you marry the wrong woman, you are FINISHED. When the right one catches you with the wrong one, you are COMPLETELY FINISHED!”

Hang in there … weekend is just around the corner.


Cartoon courtesy of American Progress.Org

Look At It Like Dis …..

Clay Bennett editorial cartoonClose but no cigar

A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He steps into the taxi and the cabbie says, “Perfect timing.  You’re just like Frank.”  Passenger: “Who?”  Cabbie: “Frank Feldman. He’s a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time.” Passenger: “There are always a few clouds over everybody.”  Cabbie: “Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy.

Passenger: “Sounds like he was something really special.” Cabbie: “There’s more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody’s birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order, and which fork to eat them with.  He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out, but Frank Feldman, did everything right.”

Passenger: “Wow, some guy then.”  Cabbie: “He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid the traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good.

He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too.  He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman.”

Passenger: “An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?”  Cabbie: “Oh, well, I never actually met Frank. But he died, and I married his —-‘ widow.”

Yeahsus!  That is sooooooooooooooooo good.  

 Huh?  No good you say?  

Well, okay, try this …  The Preacher was a preaching, he was magnifying, testifying, he was glorifying!  And then he announced to the congregation, “Do you know anyone in your life that is perfect?” and one single hand went up in the back of the church.

The fired up preacher quickly seized upon the moment and inquired of the man, “You!  You know someone who was perfect,” is that right?  And the man slowly nodded his head up and down in accordance with the preacher’s intense stare. At that point, the Preacher then demanded of the meek little man … “Who was this person, this person who was perfect?” and the little man looked down, pointed at his wife, and said, “Her ex-husband!”

Big gun show at the fairgrounds this weekend I am going out to invest in some brass.  Just as soon as I finish some unexpected paper work.  My tax return.   Yesterday I received my tax return for 2011 which was sent back from the IRS.

It puzzles me. 

They are questioning how many dependents I claimed.  I guess it was because of my response to the question: “List all dependents?”  There seems to be some confusion. They question the section where I replied: “12 million illegal immigrants; 3 million crack heads; 42 million unemployed people on food stamps, 2 million people in over 243 prisons; Half of Mexico; and 535 persons in the U.S. House and Senate.”  Evidently, this was NOT an acceptable answer.  Next year I am again asking them to take me off their mailing list, and then there is the nagging question:



Please pay your taxes you have people depending on you.

Here is the Email of the week:  This is by a daughter of a murdered couple in Raytown , MO , who had a Bible and Bookstore on 63rd street .. She says: When I had to testify at the murder trial of my parents a week ago, I was asked to raise my right hand… The bailiff started out “Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?” 

I stood there and waited but she said nothing.

She said “Do you?”

I was so stunned I blurted out “What happened to so help me God’?” 

She came back with “Do you?”

I replied yes, but I was perplexed. 

Then the judge said  “You can say that if you want to.” 

I stopped, raised my right hand, and finished with “So help me God!” 

I told my son and daughter that when it came time for them to testify, they should do the same.   I don’t know what can be done about it, but it’s time for us to step up and DO something. NBC this morning had a poll on this question.. They had the highest number of responses that they have ever had for one of their polls, and the percentage was the same as this: 86% to keep the words, 14% against… That is a pretty ‘commanding’ public response. I was asked to send this on if I agreed… Or delete if I didn’t. 

 Now it has been stated that 86% of Americans believe in God.

Therefore, I have a very hard time understanding why there is such a mess about having “In God We Trust” on our money and having God in the Pledge of Allegiance.

 The final question:  Why is America — Our nation — Catering to this 14%?  

You don’t like it here … Get out.


Have a great weekend.


What the teeming masses have been reading this week at Creative Endeavors:

Home page / Archives  
Bikinis (The reason men are pigs)  
Tweaking Your Reality  
Goin With The Flow  
Clear Blue Sky  
Eagle Bus Project Files  
Wood Ice Chest  
Pink Hat Ladies  
A Moment In Time  
You Don’t Smell Like Flowers (audio)  
Skinny Dipping With Grandpa

A special thanks to Boateral, Diane, Joey our west coast correspondent for contributing.  American Progress Online.

Change Of Heart

My grandfather used to say “the wheel that squeals the loudest gets the grease first” and there certainly appears to be a lot of truth in that saying for sure.

Awhile back I wrote a short piece on the banishment of firearms in a local eatery where I live.  The owner of this establishment stated that he did not wish for his patrons to carry a firearm into his business.  My position on it was I did not like it, and I called for a boycott of this eatery because of their position on firearms.  I published it here and I put it on webpages across Oklahoma.  This was some 30 days ago or possibly longer.

Yesterday while in town on some chores, I noted that the sign on the door has come down, and it appears that the owner of this establishment has changed his mind.  Nothing gets to them faster than empty tables or hitting them in the checkbook.  If the truth were known, most owners of business could care less about open carry gun laws, the bottom-line is where they are, always have been, always will be.

Believe it or not, boycott’s work, public opinion (at least here) still counts for something. 

Here is one more thing, then we will move on.

On Sunday, 2 days after the CT school shooting, a man went to a restaurant in San Antonio to kill his ex-girlfriend. After he shot her, most of the people in the restaurant fled next door to a theater. The gunman followed them and entered the theater so he could shoot more people.

He started shooting and people in the theater started running and screaming. It’s like the Aurora, CO theater story plus a restaurant.  Now aren’t you wondering why this isn’t a lead story in the national media along with the school shooting?

There was an off duty county sheriff’s deputy at the theater. She pulled out her gun and shot the man 4 times before he had a chance to kill anyone. So since this story makes the point that the best thing to stop a bad person with a gun is a good person with a gun, the media is treating it like it never happened. Only the local media covered it.   The city gave her a medal  …  Just thought you’d like to know.



Related:  The Wrong Diner