Just The Facts Mam’ … Shades of Dragnet.

imgres-1Our oldest boy is a cop, yeah, no joke.  Which is often on the plus side of the scale from time to time. 

As he is a cop, you can ask him what I consider are legal questions. 

Such as:  “If you turn in a guy for beating up his kids, can you still ask him about borrowing some of his tools?” 

Stuff like that. Continue reading

You Have Mail …

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Recently when Sony Corp. was hacked and embarrassing emails were leaked, it occurred to me that this could be the best thing to happen to this generation of conversation-challenged people. If sending a colorful, conversational or nasty email becomes a danger, then perhaps they will all have to start talking again. Me? I am not apologizing for nuthin, why should I start now.

Believe it or not, in Korea they are referred to as “The Tribe That Looks Down” because of their obsession with electronic devices.

Yesterday was National Chocolate Day, a day set aside for you to cover with Chocolate anything your heart desires. Please ladies, if you did take a picture of Harvey in his chocolate covered banana sling from Fredericks Of Hollywood, don’t post any pictures of it on FaceBook.

Turbulent time in the City of Angels … The family calls the police, they state that their brother is out of control and acting crazy. The police show up, the brother then attacks them with a hammer, the police shoot the brother and he dies. Now the family is all up in arms because they wanted the police to help their brother not shoot him.

So let me see, if you are cop and someone comes at you with a hammer, you are supposed to just stand there and take it?

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One more, a little bit closer to home and I am outta here.  Norman Oklahoma, “Police this morning discovered a body, wrapped in chains, hanging in a tree.” Foul play is suspected … Gee, do you think so?

Discover Channel interviewing a convict who killed his entire family and set the house on fire … “Why did you do it?” asked the interviewer.  Convict replies, “Well, they was all home.”

Thank God for prisons.

Let me know if you did not get the email.

Jus Sayin 1201

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This holiday season give the gift that keeps giving.

If you were one of million of people planning on flying home today so you could return to work … Most likely is not gonna happen as more than 3,000 flights were cancelled or have been delayed across the U.S.

There will be a short delay …
The Captain will make an announcement soon
In case of an emergency water landing your seat will turn into a floatation device
Uh huh, yeah sure.

A man was shot in L.A. this weekend after wielding a steak knife at an officer
Small child was gunned down after pointing a toy gun at a cop
I got a ticket for “No Seatbelt” which is stoopid, I had the belt, I just wasn’t wearing it.
Cover me … I am gonna change lanes.

Brown Thursday … Black Friday … And now Cyber Monday.
Stop the world I want off.

Jus Sayin

Turkey Day Ramblings 


It should be our duty and responsibility to remember a lot of guys are not coming home for the holiday.  Please keep them in your thoughts and prayers.  I can still remember sitting on a flight deck of a carrier on Thanksgiving, some 18,000 miles from home and wishing I could be there.  When you are all alone on a Holiday and away from home, it is a hard row to hoe.  

And yes, I am thankful that I made it back.

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The news is so interesting this time of the year.  Maybe it was the pot … In Colorado a man was arrested for aiming a banana at police. The officers were able to bring the incident to a peaceful conclusion since they had thankfully been taught self defense against fresh fruit, and could have even handled a man armed with Kumquats!

The cop was drawing his service weapon when the man yelled, “It’s a banana!”

For the complete story please click on the link.

Papers are reporting that Apple is worth some $700 Billion.  But not all the news is good.  I’ve heard that Apple has scrapped their plans for the new children’s-oriented iPod, after realizing that “iTouch Kids” is not a good product name.

In a once thought impossible situation, some folks in Ferguson, Mo. have united in a spirit of co-operation and formed a new alliance.  A Mexican family and a Black family have opened a new family restaurant … It is called “Nacho Mamas.”

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Where do the recently paroled or pardoned turkeys at the White House actually go?  (I am talking about the festive bird here, not a political buddy of some action committee.)

Sorry but Jimmy Fallon just doesn’t measure up and when Dave Letterman goes, it will be Ground Hog Day for me.

There’s a new Muslim clothing shop that opened in our shopping center, but they threw me out after I asked if I could look at some of the bomber jackets.  And this just in … CNN is reporting that Bingo is now being cancelled all over the Middle East.  It seems when they call out B-52 everyone runs out of the buildings.

Miller Time …. Don’t eat too much.

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Here is another spin on it:  Turkey Pardons.

Okie Two-Fer

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The state recently spent $33 million dollars to build this new interchange in Oklahoma City, at Morgan Road.  It is state of the art, as far as Interchanges go, and is so impressive, they are building a carbon-copy of it down south on I-35.

Morgan Road is a huge complex of truck-stops and a mix of other trucking related businesses, so expediting the traffic out of the area, is a top priority.  One of the features that I really like are the new on-ramps onto Interstate 40.  You have plenty of room to maneuver and exiting and entering is a breeze. 

A far cry from what it used to be.  

The other day I was in Oklahoma City doing some rat killing and after fulfilling my duties, I cut a swath for the goat farm.  I hit the Interchange and came to the “yield” sign, and as I did not note any traffic, blew thru that and headed westbound.  At this juncture the road is a well marked, two-lane, one slow lane, and one lane for entry into Interstate 40.

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As I made the corner, I sort of drifted out immediately to the higher speed lane to hit the Interstate and head home.  In my mirror, I noted a black car, and in my mind I thought to myself, “Man, I sure hope that aint a cop.”

Turns out it was, a genuine full-growed OHP (Oklahoma Highway Patrol).  He lit me up and I put on my turn signal and hit the shoulder of the Interstate.  He walks up to the truck, I roll down the window, and he asks for my lic. and proof of insurance.  Which I provide with a smile.

The officer after checking me out then motions for me to come to the rear of the truck, which I do.  He then informs me of why he stopped me (illegal lane change/no seat belt) and I say to him, “Hey?  I know you.”  He looks at me and says, “How do you know me?” and I reply, “I had a cup of coffee with you about a month ago at Banner Road, at the Shell Station.”  

He nods his head in agreement, smiles and says, “Yeah.  You are the guy with the bus.”  And I smile (figuring I got it made in the shade, I often do that for no really good reason at all) and say, “Yup.  That’s me.”

He then says, “You cut me off back there and you are not wearing a seat belt.”  Which is kind of true and not so true.  I did not cut him off, just kind of nosed ahead of him and I was wearing the belt, it was the “harness I was not wearing.”  So I smiled and said, “Well hell, give me a ticket!”  He looks at me and says, “I am gonna give you two!”

Now that is more than I bargained for and that was somewhat not expected.

Ended up getting a two-fer, one for the lane change and one for the seat belt.  I got a warning on the lane change and it is $20 for the belt.  I came home, wrote out a check for the fine, checked the box that said “guilty as hell” and like a sticky-tongue odd ball I am, licked it shut and walked it to the mailbox.  Another $20 in fuel money down the chute.

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Which is a lot cheaper than the ticket I got on the turnpike last year.

He stopped me and said, “Do you know why I stopped you?” and I replied, “Beats me.  I don’t have any coffee or donuts.”

 That will cost you $138.00 and some change.

Remember that the next time you are motoring thru our state.  Some of our cops have a sense of humor and some don’t.

OOO

Pissin On Oklahoma

This post 1,401 and last Friday we went over 1,250,000 views.  Thanks gang, we could not have done it without you.

Every now and then I come onto the Internet and I run across something quite by accident that makes me really wish that I lived somewhere else.  Such is the case this weekend, some dumb cop in Piedmont, Oklahoma, wrote a ticket to a toddler’s mother for the kid urinating in their front yard.

Piedmont, Oklahoma, is a little bedroom community of Oklahoma City just north of the city out on the prairie.  Its most noted distinction is every now and then God comes thru there and wipes the slate clean with a tornado or two.

When you read stuff like this, it all kind of makes sense.

The child, who is three by the way, was observed by a police officer urinating in the front yard.  So he drives over, demands ID (from the mother, I suppose, I understand the kid was not responding) and then writes her a $2,500.00 ticket!

Incredible.

Meanwhile crackheads, child molesters, rapists, car jackers and what have you, walk the streets with impunity.  Welcome to Piedmont, Oklahoma, please set your watch back fifty years.

Over the weekend I made a trip to town and I noticed this sign.  Kind of made me wonder what is going on and all?  Not totally out of the game, I do realize that the country is changing and all that.  We now have people who were not even born here, serving in Congress, and they are being sworn in without the Bible (this in a country who prints In God We Trust on their currency) and other foreign texts.  I also noted that Burger King is now selling the “Angry Whopper.”

It wasn’t all that long ago, they were running commercials that stated “that you could have it your way at Burger King.”  Now it flat out says something different.  “I would like a Angry-What-A-Burger and I want it my way.”

The little cheeky thing working behind the counter, looks you right in the eye and then replies ….. “NO!”

Perhaps that is the Angry Whopper?

Saw a deal on the news this weekend and it was showing statistic’s on the recent elections.  In one instance, well actually it was three instances of a dead man winning the seat that he was running for.  Can you imagine the embarrassment of a Wanna-be Congressman, running for office against a dead man and then losing?  Man that has to suck.

The same newscast pointed out that out of 24 possible candidates, something like 22 of them were returning to Washington, DC having successfully ran campaigns to get re-elected.

Kind of vindicates me, I have been saying for years, that they (the voters) always send the same tired bunch of clowns back up there instead of putting in some new blood.

But all is not lost, the girls are doing better.

We now have a lot more lesbians, immigrants, even a Harvard Law Professor sprinkled in here and there.  Lot of new female ladies in this latest batch of political hopefuls.  (And I use that word loosely)

Might as well give The Sisters a shot at it, they cannot do it any worse than the men did, which we all know was really ______ up.

(Insert expletive of your choice here)

OOO

Sisters Doin It for themselves.

All Hot And Bothered

Be Careful … I.D. Theft Is Real

Driving by the bank, 9:14 A.M. and the electronic temperature sign is reading 91* and I think to myself … “That aint bad.”  Then it occurs to me, how strange it seems that a temperature of 91* early in the morning feels quite “comfortable” opposed to the extreme heat we have been suffering thru here lately.

This morning, I am following some earth mover down a city street, huge machine, no tail-lights, no headlights, no flashers, no scout car.  Why is it I have to buy $1,200.00 a year worth of insurance before I get a tag and am allowed to drive, when this thing goes down the road with absolutely nothing?

Here is another one, come to think of it.  “I have seen people drive on out of state plates for years and obviously never give a thought to getting Oklahoma plates, off topic but it pisses you off, does me anyhow.”

We major in minor things in this country, that is our problem.

What we basically need to do is stop worry about whether or not Chick Fillet is going to serve a homosexual or marry one and get back to business.  (Perhaps someday soon, UFO’s will land on our planet and we can tell them that all these whiny people who just cannot stand it because they are unabashedly different from the rest of society, taste just like chicken and maybe this problem will be solved)

Today we are going to (bash or rant) talk about insurance.

A friend of mine called recently and he was hit by an illegal driving a car without insurance, and the other driver did not have a valid Oklahoma Drivers Lic.  More than likely the name he gave will turn out to be bogus too.  (Which really doesn’t matter, he will just change it to another Spanish surname and keep right on trucking)  My buddy however is now out of a car, or at best, going to have to figure out a way to pay for the damages and his medical.

So here we go, climbing back up on the soapbox, here it is.

We need to write an ordinance or law, stating that if a driver is pulled over by law enforcement and is not able to provide proof of Insurance, the car is towed.  Only one of every five car owners (from Mexico) in Oklahoma have insurance coverage and only one out of every three even bothers to get a lic.. This doesn’t let Okies or Caucasians off the hook either, you operate a motor vech. and you are not up to snuff … You lose it.

Pretty simple really.

When stopped for a violation and it is determined they are not up to date on either, we should take the car.  Don’t write them a ticket and allow them to drive off, call a wrecker and impound it right then and there.  To retrieve the car after being impounded, they must show proof of insurance to have the car released and/or valid drivers lic..

This should make it easy for any city in America to remove uninsured cars from our streets.  The impound lots will begin to fill up quickly and could possibly be full after only nine or ten days.  I would even venture to guess that something like 80% of the impounded cars are most likely going to be driven by illegals.

Now this has gone on long enough.

It is time for law enforcement to insist on proof of insurance or impound the car.  And to have their car released, they should have to pay for the cost of the tow, a $350 fine, and $20 for every day their car is kept in the lot.  One other thing, “drop this Spanish written drivers test and get rid of the translators. I want the person behind me to be able to READ ENGLISH.  If the sign says … Traffic stopped ahead or something to that effect.”

Guess what?

Accident rates should go down almost immediately … This solution gets uninsured drivers off the road WITHOUT making them show proof of nationality.  Which will really irritate all the PC crowd and the do-gooder cry babies who scream profiling.  I Wonder how the ACLU or the Justice Department will get around this one.  Just brings tears to your eyes doesn’t it?

So that is it for today, eight hundred words on how to solve a problem.  My total word count for August is off to a good start.  Think of me sitting in my lawn chair, watching the sun slowly disappear on the horizon and have pity on my poor twisted and tortured soul.

I do not know what is the latest.  I do not know what is new and improved.  I do not know what is available for only a short time.  All I know for sure is that I am sick of the above and of course Chicken Fillet and all that stooooopid media crap.

Such is my lot in life.  Now if you will excuse me, I am going back to my daydreams of the beach, summer time is a good time to go to the beach.

I wonder if it is cooler there?

Have a great weekend, and of course, stay hydrated and in the shade.

OOO

A sampling of what folks have been reading at Creative Endeavors this week:

Bikinis (The reason men are pigs)

Really Ungood Man

The Worry Tree

Eagle Bus Project Files

Wood Ice Chest

Clear Blue Sky

A Moment In Time

Old And Cranky