Twelve Days Of Christmas

12 Days Of Layoffs
(Parody of Twelve Days Of Christmas)

On the first day of Christmas my company gave to me
A pink slip for under the tree
On the second of Christmas my company gave to me
2 days to pack
And a pink slip for under the tree
On the third day of Christmas my company gave to me
3 Bic pens
Is that right 2 days to pack?
And a pink slip for under the tree
On the fourth day of Christmas, I gave my company
4 letter words
3 more pens
Well I’m gonna take this lamp too, then
And a pink slip for under the tree
On the fifth day of Christmas my company gave to me
5 days of sleep
4 letters words
3 bic pens
And this stapler and my coat rack and…
A pink slip for under the tree
On the sixth day of Christmas, my company gave to me
Six months of Cobra
5 days of sleep
Wake up you freaking monkey, it’s almost break time!
Oh, thanks. Is the roach coach here yet?
And a pink slip for under the tree
On the seventh day of Christmas my company gave to me
7 check a –bouncing
Oh, dear!
6 months of Cobra
5 days of sleep
I got your bonus right here!
3 lousy pens
I’m calling security
And a pink slip for under the tree
On the eighth day of Christmas my company gave to me
8 hours of drinking
I have never bounced a check in my life
5 day of sleep
You big Goofbag!
Bunch of Sticky notes
Can I at least keep thee pocket protector?
And a pink slip for under the tree
On the ninth day of Christmas my company gave to me
9 cans a cat food
8 hours of drinking
Could you not breathe on me please?
I can’t afford Cobra
5 days of sleep
4 festive words
3 Bic pens
Only 2 days to pack
And a pink slip for under the tree
I got a blue one
On the tenth day of Christmas my company gave to me
10 workers weeping,
There, there missy, it’s gonna’ get a lot worse than this
God, I hope my kids don’t get sick
Want some cat food?
5 days of sleep
Bite me!
Do I hear sexual harassment?
Would you help me carry this copier to my car, please?
And a pink slip for under the tree
On the eleventh day of Christmas my company gave to me
Eleventh hour pleading
10 workers weeping
You know I know a guy that’ll hire all three of you girls, sight unseen
And you get to work with a cobra, imagine that!
5 days of sleep
4 letter words
I ‘m warning you!
Can’t we all just get along?
And a pink slip for under the tree
On the twelfth day of Christmas my company gave to me
12 employees bumming
I know girls, I know
Say, you girls need a ride home? I got my par carked right out front?
Five days of sleep
I gave this place the best years of my life and they gave me the shaft!
And a pink slip for under the tree
Tree? What tree? We’re not gonna be able to afford a tree!
 
 

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