One of those days

Think your vote counts?  As my mother used to say, “think again.”  Moves are already being made right now to make voter registration even tougher than it already is.  Behind the scenes posturing by a few to rig the system, and in some states they are rigging the Electoral College in their favor.  More and more, we see our basic freedom’s eroding before our very eyes.  Time to wake up.

Good move.  A graffiti artist who in 2005 chose to take Facebook share, rather than his usual fee, for painting murals at Facebooks’ former headquarters in Palo Alto, Calif.  Now that Facebook has gone public, those shares may soon be worth upwards of $100 million dollars.

As the Indian Wind In His Face in the movie Dancin’ With Wolves said …. “Good Trade.”

Father like son files.  A Pennsylvania man drove to a police station to pick up a son who was charged with drunk driving.  Police after observing the father for awhile, determined that he too, was intoxicated and he was promptly arrested for D.U.I.. Police recently sat outside a popular biker bar and observed a biker come out of the bar, straddle a Harley and then fumble furiously with the ignition, his keys, and the helmet he was wearing.  After considerable effort and trying several times, he finally got it fired up and roared off, swerving from side to side, down the street. Several blocks later they pulled him over and instituted a sobriety test on the biker.  Much to the consternation of the arresting officers, the biker complied and fulfilled each request that they made. The officers thoroughly confused by all of this, asked him, “What is the deal?  We saw you leave that bar, we watched you as you started up and left, now everything you are doing is letter perfect, what is going on?”

The biker smiled and said:  “Simple.  I am the designated decoy.”

You hear about the blond who was stopped twice in the same night for drunk driving?  The cop looks at her, and says, “Out of the car lady, and starts unhooking his gun belt” where upon she says, “Oh no, not another Breathalyzer test.”

Living your dreams.  A Montana man led police on a wild 100 mph chase and was caught only when police blew out his tires.  When asked why he baited the cops into chasing him when he was stone cold sober and committed no crime his reply was … “I just always wanted to do that.”

Kind of like the frog and the scorpion.

The scorpion asked the frog, “can you take me across the river?” and the frog quickly replied, “No.”  The scorpion then asked him, “Why not?” and the frog said, “Because you will sting me that’s why.”  The scorpion pleaded with the frog, “Oh no.  I won’t do that, I promise, I really need to get across the river, and I cannot swim.” So the frog reluctantly agreed and they set off for the other side of the river.  Halfway across the river, the scorpion stung the frog.  The poor frog looked back and then said, “Why?  Why did you do that, now we will both drown.”

And the scorpion replied … “It’s just my nature.”

God’s Waiting Room.  Miami Florida has been rated the most miserable city in the U.S. by Forbes magazine, beating poverty-stricken Detroit.  The magazine cited Miami’s crippling foreclosure crisis, unemployment problems, high crime rate, taxes and a choked commuter roads. Detroit meanwhile has its own problems, one of them being vigilantism which is taking hold of the city.  Budget woes have led the city police force to be cut by over 40% over the last ten years.  At least 34 citizens killed attackers last year in what the city classified as justifiable use of force.  When you live in a city surrounded by predatory people, it is a good idea to carry (arm yourself). It is legal to carry a firearm in Oklahoma, but they don’t want you to take it into church with you, which is a big relief for some of the members of the Deacon’s Committee.

While we are at it.  We all have a bucket list of dreams, or the majority of us are alleged to have one.  Holy Smoke LLC has one of the best origin stories you will ever hear.  The Alabama firm offers to pack its customers cremated remains into shotgun shells. One of the co-founders of the company admitted publicly that it was “always one of his dreams in life” to have such a send off. “I will rest in peace knowing that I will be the last thing, that some turkey will see … me … screaming at him at about 900 feet per second.” Now you know why Alabama has a population of some three million persons but only fifteen surnames.  And that is it for today, boy & girls, geographically speaking.

One last thing:  “When you walk out the door in the morning and see a sky like this … just  go back inside, have another cup of  coffee and  stay home.

It’s  most likely NOT going to be a good  day.    

OOO Cartoons courtesy of AmericanProgress.org