Not Always What It Seems To Be

More on this tomorrow, come early and beat the rush!

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I am a lot more interesting than I seem to be”

The next time your teenager gives you a ration of it … direct him to this page … and show him this photo and tell him/her … “These are your real parents!”  That will shut him/her up for sure.

Don’t ask me why I did that, because I do not have a clue.  Might be something in the water, we drink frog water out here on the prairie and that might have something to do with it.

It could be the full moon … Who knows?

This morning I am reading where 83% of known prostitutes have a Facebook page.  Now this certainly has to give totally new meaning to “befriending someone.”  The average hooker is now getting something like 25% of all her pokes by just checking her Facebook page.

Frankly, I don’t understand all of this new technological crap and why it is necessary.  I am (as most of you are familiar with this term and my character flaw .. Pre-Sonny & Cher) old school.   I just tend to like things the way I knew them to be in the past.  Now this Facebook stuff just doesn’t cut it with me, I want it the way I was brought up.

Here is an example:

A dedicated shop steward was at a convention in Las Vegas and decided to check out the local brothels. When he got to the first one, he asked the Madame, “Is this a union house?”

“No, I’m sorry, it isn’t,” said the Madame.

“Well, if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?” he asked.

“The house gets $80 and the girl gets $20.”

Mightily offended at such unfair dealings, the man stomped off down the street in search of a more equitable shop.

At the second one, he asked the Madame, “Is this a union house?”

“No, I’m sorry, it isn’t,” said the Madame.

“If I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?” he asked again.

“The house gets $80 and the girl gets $20.”

Again offended, the man stomped off down the street in search of a more equitable shop.

His search continued until he finally reached a brothel where the Madame said,
“Why yes, this is a union house.”

“And if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?” he questioned.

“The girls get $80 and the house gets $20.”

“That’s more like it!” the man said. He looked around the room and pointed to a stunningly attractive redhead. “I’d like her for the night.”

“I’m sure you would, sir”, said the Madame while gesturing to a grotesque woman in her seventies in the corner, “but Ethel here, she has seniority.”

This photo and more at – Tau Zero – Check It Out.

Every now and then I see some dork walking off the end of a pier, or falling into a wading pool in the mall, all the while walking and listening to an I-Pod or fiddling with one of these new fangled telephones.

Now here is one that takes the cake.  Some guy, quite inebriated, walking down the railroad tracks in Canada (You can see where this one is going right?) gets hit by a train!

He admitted to being very drunk at the time, listening to his I-pod and was launched thru the air (just like Superman I suppose) and only suffered some bruises.  They said he walked away from the ordeal without even a limp.  They say God looks over fools just as much as the righteous.

Self talking, now here is one for Dr. Phil.  I suppose that most people do it, I know for a fact that I do.  Find myself discussing what it is that I am currently doing, and it is of course, “never right.”  We have a profound tendency to talk to ourselves, also known as the “Inner Critic” if you wish to read or learn more about it, here is the link.

This guy in the beer commercials? 

The Most Interesting Man? 

Just exactly who is this guy? 

I got a little curious (as I am prone to do, and I googled him, I have at times googled most of you too! … hahahaha … no not really) and it turns out that he is indeed somewhat interesting.

For instance, he once saved a drowning man (but then again, I have too) rescued a fellow mountain climber (I got my dumb A** stuck on a mountain in Colorado when I was 26, took me over six hours to get down), he has been known to intercept beautiful women in hotel lobbies, and make sweet love to them (no such luck, I usually cruise the post office or Starbucks).

He currently lives on a sailboat where he likes to read “the old philosophers.” (I live in the first house on the right on a country road)  He admits to being baffled at the news that his “most interesting character has more than 180,000 likes” on Facebook.

And he readily admitted that he didn’t even know what that was.

So as you can see, life isn’t always what it is cracked up to be, and have discovered this day, that I am a lot more interesting than I seem to be … Just wish I was a little bit taller this Thursday … But you cannot win them all.  I leave you to your amusements, I have to get out of here, Bird is going to find me a suitable video to cheer me up … I sure hope it has some tan lines in it.

The second most interesting man in the world is kind of into that these days.

OOO

[#1269]

8 thoughts on “Not Always What It Seems To Be

  1. Walmart isn’t giving up their security tapes. Uncaring Bastards.. ;( Mainly because they are needed as evidence… So, I did the next best thing and found the website I was telling you about comprised entirely of pictures of people shopping at Walmart….. Enjoy, my fellow Okie!

    And incidentally, I don’t tan…I’m entirely too white, and as such, I have no tan lines. :-)

    I loved your post!! You always make me laugh!

    Like

    • “So, I did the next best thing and found the website I was telling you about comprised entirely of pictures of people shopping at Walmart….. Enjoy, my fellow Okie!”

      So I guess my next question would be where is the link? What website? Huh?

      I am glad that you like the post.

      Don

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    • Yeah, this was good. It almost makes one ashamed that they live in a country that seems to be run over with moron’s. God bless my mother who used to look at me and say …. “Mister, you get back into that house and put on something that is presentable, you are MY son and no one is going to see you looking that way!”

      What a bunch of miserable losers … I am not sure if I will be able to go to WalMart ever again after viewing that.

      Don

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    • lol..I used to tell my kids to dress like their mother loved them…My mom was the same way…Thank God.

      Like

    • Hey Bird? You ever see a Texas Tan Line?

      Texas Tan Line

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  2. That is the coolest tan line ever!!!

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    • Just for you. Hahahahahahaha. Littlesundog is working on her’s this weekend according to her comment on Grandma’s Packing ….

      DS

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