Kiss Me I Think I Am Gay … I Apologize

Here we go again, another week of why I hate the world, eleven hundred twenty-three words on why can’t I have it MY way even tho’ there is a Burger King right down the street.  Another installment in the Creative Endeavors Get It Right America Series, soon to be a ABC Mini-Reality Adventure this November, check your local listings. 


What is the deal? 

Everyone in this country, seemingly overnight, is now a “Special Interest”group?

Whatever happened to the things we were taught at an early age … Do onto others … Live and Let Live … Walk a Mile in my shoes?  When did we become a nation of labelers, enablers, whiners, complainers … A nation of what is in this for me and screw everyone else?

What is all this crap about the Gay Agenda, I am personally getting a little sick of it.

If homosexuals/Lesbians/Gay … Whatever they are calling themselves this week, want to get married.  

So what?

(Here is a New Mexico Barber’s opinion on it.)

Like the bible says, “Go forth, multiply and produce good fruit.”  Well, they might move forward, but they sure aint gonna multiply or produce any fruit.  If they were allowed to marry and all that, well, it seems to me that within 50 years, there would not be a lot of them around (do the math – Think about it).

All these Special People want the same rights as everyone else?  Well hell, welcome to the club, I suppose I have another block of un-used time, maybe five minutes I can give you … What makes you feel so unloved and neglected?

Newsflash!  I want the same health care as everyone in Congress , I want the same tax breaks that are afforded to the rich, I want the same treatment and fairness in the court system that the crooks seem to get and I am denied.  Drop the Lone Ranger Syndrome, you are not the only game in town.  And believe it or not, I am not alone in my thinking.

Here is another take on it. 

There seems to be no end to it, television, news media, it is slowly slinking into every nook and cranny of our lives.  Now I read we have a judge who is refusing to marry “Straight Couples?”

I mean, I hate to sound redundant here but give me a break.  It is time to UN-elect another stupid “I will rule my opinion and NOT the law” judge in Texas.  We have lawmakers who are refusing to sign bills for the Girl Scouts of America because he says they “promote homosexuality?”

Open your eyes, look around.  Consider what you have learned in just a few short paragraphs in this limited space in time:

Your straight friends are not going to be able to marry, thus no new children will be legally introduced into the system and now you will have no one to fund your retirement dreams.  Which is really kind of moot issue anyway, as your electorate is busy at work right now, doing their best to water it down or just flat out abolish it as we speak.

You are not going to be able to get your hair cut any longer by gay barbers, soon you will resemble Howard Hughes in his last days on the flight back from Panama (and remember, gay people, they do finger nails too).  Being as I am follically (sp) impaired, this isn’t a big deal for me, I don’t know what the rest of you are going to do?

On top of this, we have G.I.’s reportedly burning the Quran instead of barbecuing the Taliban.  Our blessed president, prophet, overseer, or not so quite revered King, Mr. Obama, is now apologizing for offending their culture? 

Again …. So What?  Who apologizes to us when they burn our flag, when they tie our wounded soldiers body to the back of a Toyota and drag his body up and down their garbage littered streets?


Man, you are right Mr. President, this is serious, you think the price of gasoline is bad and it is a problem.  Adam & Steve cannot get married.  You will no longer be able to get a box of Pecan Sandies and a smile?  What will happen when all the Seven Eleven clerks hear of this travesty of their culture and decide to go home.  Where will I get my $6 pack of Marlboro’s — Big Gulp — or my twinkies?

Wake up America.

Stop apologizing and posturing on agenda’s that are not all that important. 

It is time to come together on a lot of this and recognize and label our main enemy.

Which seems to be everyone but us.

It is time to get ugly when you vote, send a lot of these bozo’s home, gay or straight, makes no difference, in the end, the results will always be the same.  I never thought I would live long enough to actually feel ashamed I was an American, but each day it becomes a little bit more of a reality.  More so now, than just an occasional thought.  Here is the bottom line:  United we stand … Divided we fall.  Stop apologizing to everyone else and lying to us.

Now this morning I am watching Wake Up America on CBS and all the political wanna-be-door-stops that can talk are on there telling me what it is that I need to do, in order to make all of this work.  All I have to do is turn to religion, I will soon be able to come to terms with the whole thing.

It so simple a back-alley sandal maker in Dearborn Mich. could see it.  If I convert to Islam, and my wife hacks me off, we can take care of it poste haste.  (Don’t worry Newt, we’re stoning her in the morning!)   On top of all this … The Red Cross just called me on my cellphone and asked if I could contribute towards the floods in Pakistan.  I said I’d love to, but our garden hose only reaches to the driveway.

There you go, something else all you Washington political gasbags can apologize for.

Now I am headed out to find me a non-gay-I don’t want to marry my buddy-barbershop to get my eyebrows trimmed.  I sure hope and pray I don’t get stopped and have to appear in court somewhere … I will be a goner for sure.

Mr. Obama,

you have had your fifteen minutes of fame,

now it is time for you to shut up.

(Comments section as usual is open, have at it)


“Never forget the hand that helps you up … Or the boot that shows you to the door.”


I Do Not Apologize

Get It Right America — Something Is Not Right


4 thoughts on “Kiss Me I Think I Am Gay … I Apologize

  1. Good rant! And yes….you left out ‘don’t ask don’t tell, and now’…all those guys in the shower…wondering…

    Word has it in many places…some of the chemicals put in our food and water is not doing much for the reproduction of the human speices. They WANT less people. The bird flu just didn’t get going as they hoped…so they switched to “HEY FREE VACINES!!”

    But…you are a conspiracy nut if you even THINK that those chemicals aren’t good for you. Here in St. Louis, Van Jones is setting up the whole area (with the blessing of Monsanto) to grow food for China who is going to come and make our airport it’s major hub. (courtesy of the taxpayers of course) Oh…and how nice! Monsanto has its headquarters here! The city is about second to Detroit in ghetto real estate. There IS a final solution to Michelle’s veggie march…MONEY.

    Obama is not going to give up his fifteen minutes of fame easily, we are going to have to wrench it out of his cold…arrogant hands.
    I sorry, but I don’t see anything here in the definition of “rant.” No mention of food stuffs, conspiracy theories, China, Detroit or otherwise.

    Don’t ask … Don’t tell is old news, what was covered was subject material that was current. I do however, believe it was a good commentary.

    Thanks for your reply,



  2. I have to admit…I must be a little thick. I can’t tell if this post is saying everyone should have the same rights, or if it’s saying people who don’t have the same rights should stop whining about it. I think it’s the former…maybe. The only point I’ll respond to since I am NOT 100% sure of your stance on this one is:

    “Like the bible says, “Go forth, multiply and produce good fruit.” Well, they might move forward, but they sure aint gonna multiply or produce any fruit. If they were allowed to marry and all that, well, it seems to me that within 50 years, there would not be a lot of them around (do the math – Think about it).”

    I don’t think this makes a whole heap of sense. I’m gay. And, the last time I checked, my parents (currently married 42 years) are both straight. Straight people make gay babies. All the time. And, gay people do indeed go forth and multiply. And, like their straight counterparts, produce mostly straight children.
    For what it is worth, I don’t usually take a stance on anything, I do however, exercise an opinion and that was purely what it was. I don’t know what you are smoking, but I would like some of it for the weekend.

    This part is a hoot: “And, gay people do indeed go forth and multiply. And, like their straight counterparts, produce mostly straight children.”

    Biological rule of life, “two persons of the same gender, cannot multiply.” You all marry each other, you will not produce offspring by NORMAL MEANS sorry, no points there sport. You ever have your science project in on time?

    Out of curiosity I made a trip over to YOUR webpage and here is a sample of what I found:

    “My world is shrinking because I keep choosing to make it smaller to avoid facebook et al. My facebook experiment started as a result of realizing the vast majority of people I know are…assholes. Frankly, I think most of us are assholes, but facebook just shoved in my face how asshole-ish so many of my “friends” are. I got sick of it. I would rather be ignorant. When I see a friend for dinner, I just want to enjoy the time with them and conversation without knowing they posted a solicitation to support “traditional marriage” or signed a petition demanding to “see that Kenyan’s birth certificate.” When it comes to acquaintances, I have decided ignorance truly is bliss.”

    So it should come as no big surprise you did not understand the piece. That right there kind of says it all to me (sums it up). You are right, the point is: “Straight folks are tired of all you gay folks whining about everything.” You made your bed (chose homosexuality), now quietly go lie down in it.

    I didn’t fabricate any of this, the links are there … it makes sense to me. If you want to be a queer, go for it. Don’t expect everyone else to condone or understand it.

    Happy H.I.V.



  3. Well, your response wasn’t quite what i expected, and also demonstrates you missed my point. A gay man who has sex with a woman and produces a child is still a gay man. Thus, a gay man has produced a child via perfectly normal means. And in all likelihood that child will be straight.

    And your closing comment just backs up my point about facebook and social media.



    • Congratulations, you have elevated your social status from boring gay person to internet troll. This is old news, put out last month, almost three weeks ago. Little late coming to the party sport.

      Your response of: “A gay man who has sex with a woman and produces a child is still a gay man. Thus a gay man has produced a child via perfectly normal means” argument doesn’t wash.

      Which isn’t what you said originally (And, gay people do indeed go forth and multiply. And, like their straight counterparts, produce mostly straight children).

      For the record, I said “Gays” will not multiply which is a true statement, you never mentioned gay folks having sex with a woman to produce offspring, which is “almost”normal (A Male/Female encounter).

      Whereas gay-sex (same gender sex), which I find to be is mostly perverted and not normal by any sense of the word will not produce offspring. So you are not even close to being on-base with this one skippy.

      I don’t do facebook or that other crap and I am not going to debate this with you … In other words … I am done with this. We have moved on and I suggest you do the same.



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