Swimming Alone

Having just lost about a page of what I considered “good stuff” I will now start over.  Man, I hate it when something like that happens.  It was my best intentions to start out this day on the subject of loneliness and being alone, I thought I had some good things on the page, and then whoosh, it all went south on me.  Now I find myself trying to dredge it all up and get it back on the page, but I know it is fruitless … My first shot is usually my best shot.

Awhile back I wrote something along similar lines entitled MT Mailbox and I have linked that for you.  I find it somewhat disturbing that loneliness and being alone, can sneak up on me like a thief in the night and rob me of my joy in life.  Winter time often does this very thing to me too.

No immediate relief, other than good sippin’ whiskey, I often cannot find a quick easy cure for it.  Possibly it is lack of sunshine and the constant drab of the winter sky or some other factor that I am unaware of.  As I am somewhat of a Were-wolf looney at times, the Holidays have a tendency to drag me down, I am not all that big on celebrating.  I often get lonesome this time of the year, even when surrounded by family and people.  I don’t know why.

I do know this.  Loneliness can wrap you up, as it engulfs your soul, and tears at the fabric of life.  And that it can strike you down no matter how tall you are or where you happen to be standing.

Loneliness knows no geographical boundaries.

I have been lonesome in a country some 18,000 miles away.  I have felt totally alone standing in the midst of one of the biggest cities in the world, New York City.  I have been devastated and alone the day she walked into the room and handed me the papers that said our dream was over and she walked out the door for the last time.

Sometimes when afflicted with this condition of melancholy that comes in and out of my life.  I think of this poor lonely whale that swam up the Hudson River in New York State.  The whale that the New York Times dubbed …. The Loneliest Whale in the World.

Back in 2004, The New York Times wrote an article about the loneliest whale in the world. Scientists have been tracking her since 1992 and they discovered the problem.  She isn’t like any other baleen whale. Unlike all other whales, she doesn’t have friends. She doesn’t have a family. She doesn’t belong to any tribe, pack or gang. She doesn’t have a lover. She never had one.

Her songs come in groups of two to six calls, lasting for five to six seconds each. But her voice is unlike any other baleen whale. It is unique—while the rest of her kind communicate between 12hz and 25hz, she sings at 52hz.

You see, that’s precisely the problem.

No other whales can hear her. Every one of her desperate calls to communicate remains unanswered.  Each cry ignored.  And, with every lonely song, she becomes sadder and more frustrated, her notes going deeper in despair as the years go by.

Just imagine that massive mammal, floating alone and singing—too big to connect with any of the beings it passes, feeling paradoxically small in the vast stretches of empty, open ocean.  It has been said that “art often imitates life“ and I remember a Star Trek Movie with this same theme, coming back to earth in order to save a couple of lost whales.

We spend an inordinate amount of our time, reflecting on how important we are in the grand scheme of things, when in reality, we are for the most part, quite insignificant and small.  And if allowed, I suppose we could find ourselves alone and adrift in a vast sea of humanity.  In other words, we take for granted this thing called life, and we are full up with ourselves.  But the bottom line is we are just another cog in the wheel of the universe and not all that remarkable.

If you can watch this video by the late Carl Sagan and not come away from it feeling humbled my hat is off to you.  It illustrates in a profound way how fragile life as we know it truly is.

Today as I swim thru life, I am going to chart a course that is straight and true, and at the same time, keep a well tuned ear out for another in distress.  If I can somehow help out and bring some hope and sunshine to them in their time of need, then I suppose I have done my job.  If possible I want to be a friend to someone, anyone, that needs someone to fill a void in their life.  Simply because no one in their right mind wants to go thru life swimming all alone.

Thanks for stopping by ……