Email Of The Week

Christmas Tree (audio)


Here for you enjoyment is the Email of the Week ending 12-09-2011

1. I think part of a best friend’s job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5.  I’m pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren’t going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray?  I don’t want to have to restart my collection…again.

13. I’m always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. I keep some people’s phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers.  I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

17. I wish Google Maps had an “Avoid Ghetto” routing option.

18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

19. How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod and smile because you still didn’t hear or understand a word they said?

20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front.  Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty.  Pants?  Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever…

22. Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

23. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey – but I’d bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.

24. People who forward email without deleting the tons of previous recipients should be shot and then tarred and feathered.  [This should probably be # 1 on this list.]

25. The first testicular guard, the “Cup,” was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974.  That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.  


Thanks to Larry on top of the mountain in Albq NM

3 thoughts on “Email Of The Week

  1. This was so funny and true! I’m definitely one of those snooze button champions, even though the alarm clock has been moved across the room so I have to walk to it.
    No longer being held hostage to a work routine, telephone and/or alarm clock, I do relish my ability or right to sleep in. Ironically, I do not.

    Even though I am retired a good many years, I still get up at the appointed hour and start my day, you would think you would change, but I certainly didn’t. The only thing that worked for me, was to get up and walk across the room to turn it off, and then stay up, never to return to the bed, that was a strict policy.

    My personal favorite was #13 on the list, I got a kick out of that.



  2. Eleven years in the military didn’t change me when it came to the idea of getting up early. I still love to sleep until the last possible moment. If I’m not working, I definitely sleep in late with no problem. My internal timer must be broken, lol. As for thirteen, that one has certainly worried me a time or two!
    I went back to the MAC I have had it with Microsuck.



  3. Hey, the new freezers DO come with lights! Well, at least the larger upright models do. Being a hermit, my favorite was #14.
    People that do not get an answer or I don’t want to talk to are assigned a code word, DNA (Do Not Answer) when it rings, I look down, see DNA and it goes to voice mail or back in my pocket.

    Pretty simple no?



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