The Hereafter


A friend of mine sent me this thing, about how much life has changed since 1955 and what struck me odd about it all, was that “it didn’t seem that long ago, but it has been quite sometime.”  This is what happens to you as you grow older, and life sneaks up on you.  Mama’s little boy, becomes a Daddy Baby, and then of course, you age and fade off into obscurity.

Antoinette Bowser of Virginia isn’t having a good week; she began her driving test by backing into a parked car in the parking lot of the DMV.  If that wasn’t bad enough, now the DMV is suing her for $75,000 to cover the instructor’s workers-compensation claim and now is trying to recover from her.  Some days it appears that it doesn’t pay to get out of bed.

I understand that Florida is now considering re-marking all of their highways and changing the signage along same, for the aging population in that state. As we grow older, we seem to not see so well.  Rule of life, everyone ages, we all get a turn. I am at the point in my life now, that as I age, they make me “pay up front” for a three minute egg.  It is pretty bad, when you reach a point in life, and they have discontinued your blood type at the local hospital.

My generation is now approaching the time of life, when they should be reaping the harvest. Aging baby boomers are quickly approaching retirement age, although I have been retired by an act of fate, some seventeen years. My grandson asked me just the other day, “Grandpa, how did you get to be so tough?” And I thought about it a moment and then I said, “Son, it is all that Dinosaur hunting I did when I was a kid. Hell, the decoy weighed six tons, draggin’ that thing around all day and uh” ……. Well, you get the picture, dont’cha?

What is it they say about us “Generians.” (latest nickname for Old Geezers like me). Old folks are worth a fortune. Silver in their hair, gold in their teeth, stones in their kidneys, lead in their feet, and gas in their stomachs. Here. Present! Yo’! as Hawkeye Pierce would say (Mash). I am beginning to note that I start every sentence with “I remember when” and end each one with “Bless his/her heart.”

You know how to tell if you’re old? …  I mean, “really old?”

When you get out of the shower, and you bend over to wipe down your ankles with the towel. Do you think to yourself, “Is this all I have to do while I am down here?” If you think that … well, you’re getting old.  Sorry. Often the truth is hard to take, and believe me, I know.

Baby-Boomers are reaching a point in their life when they ought to be giving serious consideration to the hereafter. Believe me, I am. Just the other day, I found myself standing in a room, clueless, searching the room with my eyes, all the time my brain was saying …… “What are you here after?”

Over and over, like a tape with no end … Where is it? Where is it? My brain is running down the mainline like a loose caboose … And the eyes, they are not helping, they are saying … What is it? What is it?

They are going to love me at the home.

I am the captain of my spirit, the master of my domain. My ship of life is still in the water, unfortunately I think I have lost not only my sails, but also my rudder. My aches and pains, they drive me up the wall, but here is the best blessing of them all.

“Of all my trials, and tribulations, I can proudly say Congratulations! Of all my problems, troubles, and limitations. I can say this. Thank God, I still have my Oklahoma driver’s license.”

I will leave you with this random thought this morning: “If you look at something long enough, it will eventually lose all it’s meaning.  I believe my grandson refers to that as “zoning out?”  Have a great weekend. (Bless Your Heart)

OOO

One thought on “The Hereafter

  1. Laughed all the way through this. My mother, who is 82, bless her heart [sorry, couldn’t resist], still tears around in her Lexus coupe, but she has her days and I threaten her with Shady Pines or the ice floe. She figures the ice floe might be the way to go. But we are a long-lived family. She has a while to go yet. She’s younger than this baby-boomer in many ways.
    ======================
    I believe it was the plains Indians or possibly the Cheyenne that took their elderly out on the plains and then left them there to die. I cannot remember who it was, could have been the Sioux. In America, we are known for our propensity to deposit our elderly in assisted living or nursing homes and forget about them.

    It is a national shame, but it happens. This is why you should be nice to your children, they are after all, the people who will eventually pick out your nursing home.

    DS

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