Boogie Woogie Choo-Choo Train

Not a whole lot of good news floating around lately, but we do our best to try and sift it out and present it to you.  You can take solace in the fact, that you are not alone when it comes to economic hard times.  I read this morning where Hooter’s has just moved into Japan, complete with “waitresses in white tank tops and orange short-shorts.”  They are now serving cheapo booze and chicken wings to Tokyo businessmen.

Deflation has hit in Asia, during Japan’s boom years, which ended roughly around 1990, the country was an ATM machine for brands like Prada, Gucci, and Louis Vuitton.  Just shows you … be nice to everyone you meet on the way up, they are the same folks you will meet on the way down.

It has gotten so bad here lately, that I understand that even Al Quida is laying off.  I received this Email this week concerning this.

Muslim suicide bombers in Britain are set to begin a three-day strike today in a dispute over the number of virgins they are entitled to in the afterlife.  Emergency talks with Al Qaeda have so far failed to produce an agreement. The unrest began last Tuesday when Al Qaeda announced that the number of virgins a suicide bomber would receive after his death will be cut by 25% this February, from 72 to only 54.

The rationale for the cut was the increase in recent years of the number of suicide bombings and a subsequent shortage of virgins in the afterlife.  The suicide bomber’s union, the British Organization of Occupational Martyrs (BOOM) responded with a statement that this was unacceptable to its members and immediately balloted for strike action.

General Secretary Abdullah Amir told the press, “Our members are literally working themselves to death in the cause of Jihad.  Speaking from his shed in Tipton in the West Midlands , in which he currently resides, Al Qaeda chief executive Osama bin Laden explained, “We sympathize with our workers concerns, but Al Qaeda is not in a position to meet their demands.   They are simply not accepting the realities of modern-day Jihad in a competitive marketplace.

“Thanks to Western depravity there is now a chronic shortage of virgins in the afterlife.   It’s a straight choice between reducing expenditure and laying people off.  I don’t like cutting wages but I’d hate to have to tell 3,000 of my staff that they won’t be able to blow themselves up.”  Spokespersons for the Union in the north east of England, Ireland, Wales, and the entire North American and Australian continents stated that the strike would not affect their operations, as “there are no virgins in our areas anyway.”

Unfortunately it is the same in the west.  Rumor has it that the Obama administration has terminated or canceled Christmas in the Nation’s Capitol this year.  Something about “not being able to locate three wise men, or for that matter, a virgin.”   Must be indicative of the fast and loose times we find ourselves in.*

Time to go, remember this Holiday Season … “Friends do not give friends fruitcake!”

I am late with my hauling … Lot’s to do this day.  The morning sun is breaking the horizon, as I am fond of saying, “I need to get crackin on all those little nuiances of life that just make my day.” Congratulations you made it to Friday!  Now comes the weekend, (the “much awaited weekend”) and believe me, I am ready.  Mama says I get to put up Christmas Lites … Oh joy!
Happy Holidays and have a great weekend!
*  Thanks Cracker Bill.  Cartoon is courtesy of American Progress Online