By The Numbers
In the wake of Barack Obama’s election as president a record number of American’s are optimistic that relations between blacks and whites in America will improve. 67% said racial problems would eventually be worked out, while 30% said race would always be a problem in America, and the remaining 3% in the swamps of the Everglades could not be reached for comment.
By a margin of 55% to 37% most are Americans are not confident that Iraq will be successful in developing a stable and “reasonably democratic” government. A significant number of Americans, 37% still believe that Iaq was in possession of weapons of mass destruction when the U.S. invaded in 2003.
Sign Here and Trust Me
Hong Kong – Asia’s richest woman allegedly gave away her multi-billion-US-dollar fortune to a Hong Kong feng shui master in return for a promise of eternal life. Nina Wang, who died of cancer last year at age 69, signed over her vast fortune to previously unknown feng shui master as a result of the promise, a lawyer quoted by the South China Morning Post said.
The claim was made by a barrister for the late billionaire’s charitable foundation in a preliminary hearing Monday to challenge the will. Well, I hope so, geeeze.
Phylis used to do that but they laid her off last year.
(Any resemblance to anyone living or dead named Phylis is purely coincidental. Lawyer boys said for me to put that in there … Hah!)
Phoenix Arizona – Arizonans who have lost their jobs will have to wait nearly a month to get their first unemployment benefits. Normal wait time is 10 days. The delays are because of a surge in applicants and a lack of workers processing claims. Last week, the state received more than 9,100 first-time unemployment claims, more than double in the same week a year ago.
Get Out And Pick Up Your Trash
Louisville, Kentucky – James Gissendaner, 47, said he gathered nearly 1,000 campaign signs that were incorrectly placed in state rights of way – such as the area between sidewalks and roads, or the medians separating traffic lanes.
The final batch of more than 300 signs, from Republican and Democratic candidates, went to a city facility that will hold them for 30 days then offer them back to the candidates. Also trash related, the Federal government reports that they pick up “nine times the national average in trash alongside Oklahoma Interstate highways” what does that tell you about the people that live in Oklahoma. Here is a clue …. “Oink-Oink.”
Three Years For Your Thoughts
Santa Fe, New Mexico – A jury found a Japanese man guilty but mentally ill in the stabbing of an English biologist who was speaking on “thought transference” during an international conference. The verdict requires the state to treat Kazuki Hirano, 34, if he is incarcerated. Hirano accused the victim of controlling his thoughts. Hirano faces up to three years behind bars.
No Happy Trails In Utah
Logan Utah – People aren’t the only ones to suffer in this lousy economy. Cache County has a growing population of abandoned horses because of tough economic times and the loss of horse processing facilities, according to equine experts. Utah State University veterinarian Kerry Rood said some owners mistakenly think an abandoned horse will adapt, but most horses are unable to find enough food.
New Math In The Sunshine State
Naples, Florida – The Collier County school district has replaced zero with 50 as the lowest score an elementary school student can get on an assignment. Officials said zeros are punitive and rarely reflect a student’s overall abilities. The union that represents most of the district’s teachers said the new scoring system undermines teachers’ credibility.
The last time Cup Cake and I had problems with “zero’s” was when that plumber came by, looked at the work to be done, and then whispered to the idiot kid assistant with him …. “Go out to the truck and fetch me some zero’s for this estimate.”
(Any resemblance to anyone living or dead who is or has been described as an idiot is purely coincidental)
Hide it in there somewhere … They won’t notice at all.
In case you missed this story in Creative Endeavors the other day, USA Today writes “Airlines last week eliminated or significantly lowered fuel surcharges for tens of thousands of domestic fares, but consumers are not paying less for most tickets. We have seen a tectonic shift in domestic airfares, but it’s not great news for consumers, because the major airlines have, for the most part, simply shifted the surcharge amount into the base airfare,” I swear it is almost as if they are reading my mind. Check out the full story online.
Now I am not a big fan of Sarah Palin, but writing articles on “her children s underwear?” C’mon, give me a break. That is just lame, downright lame. That isn’t news. What a crock that is. Link is here. Be sure to look at comment #2 it is a hoot. Today’s big story on the CNN Political line is how the Bush people sent out a Christmas card to a bunch of Jewish folks with a Christmas tree on it. (Which in some circles would be considered offensive) This is news?
Give us a break, find some news or just be quiet. How about an article on the ghosts that live in the White House, the fundead of Washington DC. Corpses who walk around at night with lampshades on their heads. Yeah that would be news.
Bad Roads … Even Badder News.
SEATTLE, Washington – Expect a bumpier drive. An asphalt shortage is delaying road maintenance projects in communities nationwide. Asphalt is becoming scarce as U.S. refiners overhaul their equipment to maximize output of highly profitable fuels such as diesel and gasoline, using inexpensive — and hard to process — .
Meanwhile rumors are circulating that Exxon has sent representatives nationwide to seek out old drive in theaters because the understand a lot of there was a lot of ass felt there in the eighties ….. Wait that is not right.
(Any resemblance to anyone living or dead who ever went to a drive in and in the backseat had their … Oh never mind!)
There you go … All the news that is fit to be in print, or causes fits in print.
You be the judge, I am now going to retire to the TV Room and wait on a “settlement” of my bird and my stuffing