The Long View

OPEN ROUNDLauderhill Florida – Four years and more than 700,000 rubber bands since he began, Joel Waul has clinched the Guinness World Record for the largest rubber band ball. The ball, which sits under a tarp in Waul’s driveway, weighs 9,032 pounds and is more than 6 feet tall. The old record was 4,594 pounds.

Waul, 27, estimates he spent $10,000 on the project.  We did something like that up in Kansas once, drove 45 miles to the the Worlds Biggest Ball of String!  And of course the Worlds Biggest Prairie Dog … Which was constructed of Solid concrete.

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Albany New Yawk – Two major pharmacy chains agreed to translate prescription drug instructions into customers’ primary languages in more than 2,000 stores statewide by March 31, 2010. CVS and Rite Aid will counsel and provide written translations in Spanish, Chinese, Italian, Russian, French and Polish.  Now you do understand that when you travel abroad to these countries, they are going to extend to you the very same privileges.

And they wonder why no one can speak English in this country.  (What a bunch of prunes!  Inside joke, you have to read the comments section)

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Medford Oregon – A woman pleaded guilty to theft charges and was sentenced to up to 90 days in jail and pay back more than $3,000 to residents. Carley Torres, 35, and her husband had their children go door to door, asking for donations to send their oldest daughter to a volleyball camp. But the couple spent the money at malls and monster truck rallies, authorities said.

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Caldwell Idaho – Michael Hart, 29, has been sentenced to 10 years in prison for an attack on his wife that included dousing her with lighter fluid and setting their bed on fire. Hart of Nampa pleaded guilty to attempted strangulation and arson for the May 6 attack on Jessica Holmes. Holmes survived and escaped with her two children.

Something for the girls …. Ladies if you want a good read, stumbled across one the other day, you might want to check her out.  The Resaurant Gal (this is not a typo, she is spelling it that way).

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President Bush hosted the world conference on money matters this week.  The agenda for the meeting of 20 top economies in the world was one of the most important money conferences since World War II.  Items discussed were how to impose more government control over lending and create more transparency within money markets.  Bush holding an economic conference is something to the Wylie Coyote holding his annual “teach chickens how to fly” summit outside of Waco, Texas.

They want more transparency?  Most of these bankers have their head so far up their A** they need a plexi-glass stomach just to see where they are going.

One thing about Mr. Obama, he is a class act, he opted out of the meetings allowing the Lame Duck president to go through the motions and enjoy his waning moments in his quickly fading Washington sunset.  Face it, no lame-duck president can do anything meaningful after the successor is elected.  The time in-between election and installation is too long, it gives them too much time to issue pardons to convicted political pals.

Bill Clinton issued more than 200 pardons between November and January before leaving office.  Mr. Obama said he was going to do his best to wrestle the problems of the economy on 60 Minutes.  Let’s hope so, it is so dog-gone bad that when we called a plumber the other day, that sucker actually showed up on time!

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Sarah Palin is in the news, discussing her future in the G.O.P ……….. haha-haha-hahaha- haha-haha-hahaha- haha-haha-hahaha- haha-haha-hahaha- haha-haha-hahaha- haha-haha-hahaha- haha-haha-hahaha- Oh excuse me, I believe I just hurt myself.  Can Sarah Palin actually be harmful to good health?  Read it here.

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A.I.G. (American Insurance Group) those wonderful parasites that are currently enjoying a nice high ride on taxpayer money, said that they are not going to apologize for their last exorbitant party and binge.  The CEO of that company which has taken a financial lifeline from the taxpayers (largest in history) said he isn’t sure if that will be sufficient.  Reporting a $24.47 billion loss this week, sure sounds like “party time to me.”

Just like I said, “Feed ’em once, and they will be back.”  Kind of like petting a dog.  You pet a dog and you have a job for life.  Personally I would rather have the dog, you can trust a dog, and of course, a lot cheaper to feed.

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Nothing is sacred anymore, in Seattle this past week they announced the cancellation of the annual Nude Bicycle Ride in city parks.  Citing 23 people for indecent exposure and arrests of obscene exposure.  Which reminds me of the young couple who were on vacation with their two small children.  They were driving down the road and they saw a sign that read …. “Nature Park.”  So they decided to turn off the main highway and go see this park, not knowing that it was in fact, a nudist colony.

As they drove down this secluded road, coming around the curve, they spied a group of totally nude adults on bicycles approaching them with no way to stop and turn around.  As they slowly drove by all the naked people, who smiled and waved, the youngest child, a precocious 4 year old in the backseat exclaimed … “Did You see that!” and the mother said, “Yes we did.

Where he replied, “Not one of those guys had a helmet on!

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What Were You Thinkin

oprah-phil

Dr. Phil’s test, here you go, try this!  Dr. Phil scored 55, he did this test on Oprah and she got a 38. Some folks pay a lot of money to find this stuff out!

Read on, this is very interesting!  Don’t be overly sensitive!  The following is pretty accurate and it only takes a few minutes. Take this test for yourself and send it on to your friends. Print it out and place it under the Christmas Tree, makes a nifty place-mat setting for the Holidays ….

Don’t peek, but begin the test as you scroll down and answer. Answers are for who you are now and not who you were in the past. Have pen or pencil and paper ready. This is a real test given by the Human Relations Dept. at many of the major corporations today.

This simple little test helps them get better insight concerning their employees and in their prospective employees.  It is instrumental in our trying times to inquire of whom you are hiring.  The mind is a terrible thing, and it must be stopped before it kills somebody!  That kind of thing.

It’s only 10 Simple questions, so grab a pencil and paper, keeping track of your20 letter answers to each question.  Ready? Begin.

1. When do you feel your best…

A) in the morning
B) during the afternoon and early evening
C) late at night

2. You usually walk…

A) fairly fast, with long steps
B) fairly fast, with little steps
C) less fast head up, looking the world in the face
D) less fast, head down
E) very slowly

3. When talking to people you…

A) stand with your arms folded
B) have your hands clasped
C) have one or both your hands on your hips
D) touch or push the person to whom you are talking
E) play with your ear, touch your chin, or smooth your hair

4. When relaxing, you sit with…

A) your knees bent with your legs neatly side by side
B) your legs crossed
C) your legs stretched out or straight
D) one leg curled under you

5. When something really amuses you, you react with…

A) big appreciated laugh
B) a laugh, but not a loud one
C) a quiet chuckle
D) a sheepish smile

6. When you go to a party or social gathering you…

A) make a loud entrance so everyone notices you
B) make a quiet entrance, looking around for someone you know
C) make the quietest entrance, trying to stay unnoticed

7. You’re working very hard, concentrating hard, and you’re interrupted…

A) welcome the break
B) feel extremely irritated
C) vary between these two extremes

8. Which of the following colors do you like most…

A) Red or orange
B) black
C) yellow or light blue
D) green
E) dark blue or purple
F) white
G) brown or gray

9.. When you are in bed at night, in those last few moments before going to sleep you are…

A) stretched out on your back
B) stretched out face down on your stomach
C)on your side, slightly curled
D)with your head on one arm
E) with your head under the covers.

10.You often dream that you are…
B) fighting or struggling.
C) Searching for something or somebody
D) flying or floating

E) you usually have dreamless sleep
F) your dreams are always pleasant

Answers Here

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What Were You Thinkin answers

Grade your score and answers to the doctor Phil test here:

Points for each question:

#1.  (a)2 (b)4 (c)6
#2.  (a)6  (b)4  (c)7  (d)2  (e)1
#3.  (a)4  (b)2  (c)5  (d)7  (e)6
#4.  (a)4  (b)6  (c)2  (d)1
#5.  (a)6  (b)4  (c)3  (d)5  (e)2
#6.  (a)6  (b)4  (c)2
#7.  (a)6  (b)2  (c)4
#8.  (a)6  (b)7  (c)5  (d)4  (e)3 (f)2 (g)1
#9.  (a)7  (b)6 (c)4  (d)2  (e)1
#10. (a)4  (b)2  (c)3  (d)5  (e)6  (f) ?

Now add up the total number of points.

OVER 60 POINTS: Others see you as someone they should ‘handle with care’. You’re seen=2 0as vain, self-centered, and who is extremely dominant. Others may admire you, wishing they could be more like you, but don’t always trust you, hesitating to become too deeply involved with you.

51 TO 60 POINTS: Others see you as an exciting, highly volatile, rather impulsive personality, a natural leader, who’s quick to make decisions, though not always the right ones. They see you as bold and adventuresome, someone who will try anything once, someone who takes chances and enjoys an adventure. They enjoy being in your company because of the excitement you radiate.

41 TO 50 POINTS: Others see you as fresh, lively, charming, amusing, practical, and always interes ting, some one who’s constantly in the center of attention, but sufficiently well balanced not to let it go to their head. They also see you as kind, considerate, and understanding, someone who’ll always cheer them up and help them out.

31 TO 40 POINTS: Others see you as sensible, cautious, careful & practical. They see you as clever, gifted, or talented, but modest. Not a person who makes friends too quickly or easily, but someone who’s extremely loyal to friends you do make and who expect the same loyalty in return. Those who really get to know you, realize it takes a lot to shake your trust in your friends, but equally that it takes you a long time to get over if that trust is ever broken.

21 TO 30 POINTS: Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy. They see yo u as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder. It would really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively
or on the spur of the moment, expecting you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then usually decide against it. They think this reaction is caused partly by your careful nature.

UNDER 21 POINTS: People think you are shy, nervous, and indecisive, someone who needs looking after, who always wants someone else to make the decisions and who doesn’t want to get involved with anyone or anything! They see you as a worrier who always sees problems that don’t exist. Some people think you’re boring. Only those who know you well, know that you aren’t.

I got a 44 ….. I think I am supposed to be a bomber pilot.

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