Creative Endeavors, The Home of BoxcarOkie.com

February 13, 2013

TIME IS RUNNING OUT

Open Carry:  If you are going to carry an illegal loaded semiautomatic firearm in New York City, it is probably best to not press your luck by trying to beat a $2 subway fare.  Amazing what people will do and then how much time they have to think about it later on …

How about seven years?   

Droning On:  I noted at the bank today the cover of time magazine had a Military Drone on the front cover.  This past weekend CBS had quite a bit of airtime, devoted to the same subject, it appears that they are hot now.  They are being used not just by the military but police departments, national guard units, you name it.  So far this tool for terrorists has only taken out some 59 known bad guys, but has killed something like 34,000 poor citizens who were listed as “collateral damage.”

Mans’ best doing man’s worst … Fly one over my property and I can assure you “it will not come home.”  If it does it will be full of buckshot from my 12 gauge.

Fifty years of James Bond …  It is kind of slow around here, we are currently being snowed upon which is okay, because we could use the moisture.  So I find this cinema love fest on television, “Fifty Years of James Bond” and I am of course, amazed and amused at the same time.  

Fifty years just doesn’t seem possible and then there is the always engaging Double O Seven loading freshly shot pheasants into the back of a truck on a French Chalet and the tag on the tailgate is there plain to see …. California.

Finally something for us old geezers:  Silicone Valley has introduced the first edition of the new baby boomer computer and keyboard.  Supplies are limited at this time.

ATT00001

Change the Batteries – Set it to Vibrate – or just remove it:  A prisoner in a Shri Lanka prison was found to have stuffed a cellphone up his wah-zoo (chocolate speedway) and two “hands free” packs with it (good idea).  Everything was going just fine until someone he had just called … returned his call … which did not amuse his handlers in the least.

New Religious Experience in Texas:  Do you owe money on a car?  Finance company banging on the door, here is a tip.  Crush it.  At the same time, save yourself the drudgery of doing lawn mowing this summer, throw in a couple of lawnmowers for good measure.  The Church of Later Day Saints is alive and well, crushing lawnmowers and cars south of the Red River.

Time is running out:  Well, well, well … Here it is the 13th of the month, and of course, a lot of you guys have done nothing to improve your marital status or the relationship you share with “your significant other” and you are for the most part, dead in the water.

Having procrastinated for literally weeks, you find yourself adrift in an ocean full of sharks, and you suddenly discover YOU are the chum.  Oh-my-gosh, down to just one more day, a scant 24 hour period with which to redeem yourself.  Someone needs to throw you a life vest.

As I am a generous sort, I will give you a hint.  

Take her to someplace she has never been, to a place where she can relax, enjoy a good meal, get some rest.  

Flowers are nice, chocolate will work with some girls, and there is always the occasional choochie-coupon to be redeemed.  But if you want to make her happy, take her somewhere for the holiday, wine and dine her.

It works.  On Valentines Day, I asked mine one year, “Can I kiss you in a place you have never been kissed?” and she looked up at me with those big brown eyes, eyes so wide that a man could get lost in and then she said … Omaha Nebraska?

Now I have to go, Dr. Phil is coming on …. “His Girlfriend has Robbed him Blind.” …. Rebecca says her sister has betrayed her by sleeping with the important men in her life;  Steve says his girlfriend keeps stealing his money.

New.

I am just a sucker for love I suppose.

OOO

June 15, 2012

Grandma’s Packing – Hammer Down

Filed under: Blogging,Life,Oklahoma,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 8:13 AM
Tags: , , , ,

“Hell, anyone that has the amount of friends I have in this town, ought to be wearing a gun!”

Here lately, y’all have been sending me so many video’s of the whacko’s at WalMart, that it has effected my shopping habits.  Now when I am at WalMart, instead of looking for products, I find myself checking the store for freaks!  So it was kind of refreshing this week to have someone send me a picture of a WalMart shopper that is dressed appropriately for the day and age we live in.

Finally a picture of a WalMart shopper that knows how to dress for success.

This one is of a Texas Tan Line, it was sent to us this week and I also found it amusing.

While we are at it?  There was a guy in Kansas that was running for the office of sheriff and he lost the election by an overwhelming number of votes, in other words, they beat the pants off the guy.

The next day he was spotted walking down main-street with a sidearm clearly visible on his side.  His friend saw this and inquired of him, “Say Frank, you lost the election for sheriff, why are you wearing a gun?”  Frank looked him straight in the eye and then said, “Hell, anyone that has the amount of friends I have in this town, ought to be wearing a gun!”

Recently we reported that Texas was building a new toll road and the speed limit was proposed at 85MPH.  After some short reading yesterday it appears that this could be insufficient to meet the needs of the American driving public.

Authorities say a 28-year-old man in upstate New York has been charged with driving his motorcycle at nearly 200 mph on a highway in the rain.  I have never been able to figure out that one, almost every journalist or reporter will say “driving a motorcycle” when in reality, you RIDE a motorcycle, you do not drive it.

Anywho …. State police say a trooper clocked Anthony Anderson of Poughkeepsie driving at 193 mph around 8 p.m. Wednesday in the southbound lanes of Interstate 87 just south of Albany — the same stretch of road where another motorcyclist was spotted doing 166 mph earlier this month.

The trooper was able to get a description of the high-performance bike and alerted nearby patrols. (It just went by me, I think it was some fool driving a motorcycle!)  Troopers eventually stopped Anderson in the town of Rosendale. He told them he was headed to a hospital to visit a patient.

Anderson was issued 14 traffic tickets, including one for speeding.  It couldn’t be immediately determined if he had a lawyer (smart money says he will be needing one).

So Anderson visited his sick friend and got enough safe driving awards to wallpaper his bedroom and he did all of it at a speed considerably higher than 85mph.

Wait!  It gets better.

In Montana where a high percentage of the roads are posted with “drive at a speed that you consider safe and reasonable” (I am not making this up people, I have been there) they clocked a drunk driving … get this …134 mph!  They finally caught up with him in town (sitting there sipping a Bloody Mary at the stoplight I assume) and took him into custody.

He had no license, no insurance and this was or is going to be his third D.U.I..

Amazing how the country or society is changing, we routinely accept the insane as the norm now and we make no bones about it.  We had D.W.I. = Driving While Intoxicated, and then we moved to D.U.I. = Driving Under the Influence, and now we have D.W.Y. = Driving While Yaking (talking or texting on a cellphone).

Hark, the weekend quickly approaches … I am ready.  Here is something to help you form a mental image of what I will be doing this weekend.

You do your best to do the same.

If you happen to be out and about, motoring in our great country, get over in the slow lane and be sure to check your rear-view mirror … Often.

See you all on Monday.

OOO

What folks have been reading this week at Creative Endeavors:

Home page / Archives
Bikinis (The reason men are pigs)
Really Ungood Man
Clear Blue Sky
Eagle Bus Project Files
Lawn Mowing Sucks
Flu Ride (Audio)
Bus Life
The Worry Tree
One More Mountain To Cross

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