Creative Endeavors, The Home of BoxcarOkie.com

December 9, 2010

In The Dog House

Filed under: Life,Oklahoma,politics — ldsrr91 @ 2:13 AM
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Why is it Christmas music sticks in your mind, for days at a time?  I hear one song, and I am trapped!  To stumble blindly thru the day humming some insistent tune, locked into my mind, tighter than an Investment Bankers bonus payment.  Christmas season is in full swing, decorations are everywhere you look, along with the long ago abandoned political signs that never got picked up by a winner or a loser for that matter.

So here we sit, almost the end of the year, what do we have for you?

The good ole days?  The Rich get richer, you get, well you know the rest of that don’tcha.  Greed is Good, Wall Street is back, watch for the DVD at Walmart soon.  Do you know who the most arrested Hollywood Star might be?  First guess would be Charlie Sheen, he is always in the news, but that would be wrong.  It is his Dad, Martin Sheen, a political activist.

Back to the rant, I am sorry.

What has this year given us?  Separation of Church and state, Drill Baby Drill, Full body scanning, Health Care ….. Good Luck.  I watched this Sarah Palin does Alaska thing the other night, Yummy Mummy shoots a moose.  They say that this is just a regular show, it has no political overtones, just good family fun entertainment.

Yeah?  That is kind of like saying, “The Biggest Loser isn’t about fat people.”

Our National Mood is changing again, one more time, the American Landscape gets a face lift.  We seem to swing like the pendulum on an old wooden clock, first this way and then, the other.  It has gotten so bad that now California welfare recipients are in for hard times.  Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger banned the use of state-issued debt cards recently.  They are no longer honored as payment for psychics, medical marijuana shops, bingo parlors, tattoo parlors, and cruise lines.  All of which have shown up in the past as businesses where the recipients are spending their benefits.

All of this stinks of course, government run amuck as usual.

How about this?  An Ohio sixth-grader has been given detention for farting on the school bus.  Christian Summers, 11, says the flatulence was involuntary, and thinks it “pretty dumb” that he was sentenced to detention.  (What other kind of answer would you expect from an eleven year-old?)  The bus driver, maintains that Summers’ stinky wind breaking was intentional, noting on the detention slip that “while the others scream, he laughs.”  Personally, I think detention should only come after the child is heard telling someone on the bus “to pull his finger.”  That to me, indicates pre-meditated-flatulence behavior and therefore, punishment.

Well Boys & Girls I see the morning sun is breaking the horizon, I need to get crackin on all those little nuances of life that just make my day, thanks for allowing me to take time to share this week with you.  Here is something for you to take with you this day, all you men who wait until the last minute to get that special someone something for Christmas:

Just In Time For Christmas … In The Doghouse

OOO

November 18, 2010

Unwed And Unloved

Filed under: Oklahoma,politics,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 3:56 AM
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Who says “women are the frustrated sex?”  A Taiwanese woman who was unable to find a husband is marrying herself so she can have a wedding.  An office worker from Taipei, has photographs taken of herself in a wedding dress and will marry herself next month in a lavish ceremony before whisking herself off for a honeymoon in Australia.  “Age 30 is a prime period for me” she said.  “your work and experience are in good shape, but I haven’t found a partner, so what can I do”

Uh, pack some batteries for the honeymoon?

Oklahoma for all of you who are blissfully unaware, is one of those “fly-over states” a stronghold of good Republican politics’.  Yesterday while consuming a Western Omelet at the local beanery I had one of them there epiphany things.  (Okie Talk)  We just had a landslide victory (not only here but nationwide) of Republican’s elected back into the system, and effectively changed the balance of power in their favor.

So here it is in a nutshell …. Where the rubber meets the road as they say around here … “Who are they going to blame now, when things do not improve or God forbid, get worse?”

Send The Bums Home

Halfway thru my hash-browns it also occurred to me that Mr. Obama has kept his promise of more jobs …. Freshman Congressman.  Government that works.

One of the recent causalities in the election process was the California Pot Initiative.  It seems that it went up in smoke … Nice play on words eh?  Voters wholeheartedly rejected the proposal.  Proposition 19, which would have allowed adults over 21 to grow their own smoke or purchase up to an ounce of marijuana for personal use, lost by 54%.  Every region of the state voted it down, except for San Francisco of course.  Legal marijuana at this point in California is already a $1 billion business.  It is also believed that people who invest in medical marijuana at this stage of the game, 9 out of 10 will most likely go under within a year.

If you want to make some money, try Gold.

James one of our favorite number crunchers will appreciate this one.   If you were to purchase all the gold that has ever been mined it would give you control of a pretty big block of the precious metal.  But at today’s prices you could instead purchase all the farmland in America and 10 ExxonMobils, and still have about $1 trillion in walking around money.

So you make the call, pot or gold, which one is the smart buy.

Speaka-Da-English?

Oklahoma voted on initiatives to insure that English was the common and unifying language and now all the signs will have to be changed at the entrance to the state.  Instead of reading Oklahoma Welcomes You, it will now read Red People Welcomes You.

Isn’t progress cool boys & girls?

Boo!  I bet I scared you Ha-Ha.  I have a parrot that says that, just cracks me up.  That friends, is about the scariest thing in my house.  I am so glad that all this Ghoulish October Halloween garbage is finally over.  Did you know that 37% of Americans say they believe in ghosts.  23% say a ghost has visited them, and 20% say they’ve seen or heard a ghost.  No Elvis sightings at Walmart this week, but Michael did release a new CD.

One more sad, but newsworthy thing to report.

This is not going to make someones‘ day.  Everyone who bought one of those 2012 books, loosely based on the Mayan Calendar and the end of the world, are going to be somewhat let down.  This is because new research has found an error in the conversion of Mayan to modern calendars, and that the “end of days” predicted by the Mayan calendar is not December 21st, 2012, but may actually be some 50 to 100 years later. Good news for everyone who owns a Time Share, bad news for all those people who print Mayan Calendars.

Never, ever underestimate the power of people to get it wrong.

OOO

November 16, 2010

Mugg Shots

Filed under: Bus Life,Oklahoma,Uncategorized — ldsrr91 @ 4:39 AM
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Man, what is this world coming to?  I just read that McDonald’s Hamburgers has been banned from selling Happy Meals in San Francisco, California.  Once again, the elected Nim-Com-Poops have rallied together to “protect us from ourselves.”  Never underestimate the stupidity of people in large groups.

They banned the meals because of their fear that it “might entice children to eat food that was loaded with fats, salt, sugar.”  From here on out, they can only offer a toy with the meal, if the meal is low-fat, low-salt, low-sugar.

I hate to throw a wet towel on all this boys, but the mechanism to keep all this in check was already in place … It is called “Parenting.”

But there is good news, across the bay, in Oakland (The murder capital of California) the “Happy To Be Alive Meal” is still being sold.  The toy this week as I understand it, is a zip gun.

Now on the other side of the country, the Nanny Patrol finds it necessary to cancel school dances.


Hide the adults! Teens are dirty dancing

It’s interesting to note that the dance wasn’t canceled out of concern for the kids — the usual defense — but because teachers refused to subject themselves to another night of watching teenagers dry hump to music. It really makes you wonder whose innocence they’re trying to protect — the kids’ or their own. Posted on November 13, 2010 by Bill on Cracker Boy or you can read the full story on Salon here.


45% of American adults say daylight saving time is “not worth the hassle. While 40% say it is.”  27% say they’ve arrived somewhere early or late because they forgot to change their clocks. And 98.5% say they cannot explain to their family cat at 4:16 A.M. why it is NOT time to go outside each morning.

A Legend In His Own Mind

George Bush released a new book last week, after two years of self imposed exile in the Lone Star State, he is appearing here and there to talk about his book “Decision Points.”  Which I understand is a major yawner available for about $25 nationwide.  Kind of ironic, the book comes out AFTER THE ELECTIONS guess it wouldn’t look too cool, throwing all of your Republican buddies under the bus, a week or two BEFORE the vote is counted.

Anyway, I am going to take a pass, Bush has lied to me before.

Speaking of buses? (He did it again! He did it again!)  Last spring, , an unemployed hotel concierge in St Paul Minn bought an old junkyard bus for $2,000.  He fixed it up, and now drives around the Twin Cities giving free rides to people at bus stops.  He even passes out free coffee and encourages sing-a-longs.  The good news is we need more people like Freddy Jackson, willing to step up to the plate and help out.

The bad news is some jerk will most likely sue him for everything that he has if he has an accident.  That is unless the City Fathers hear of the competition to city run bus lines, and just shut him down completely.

It is not easy being a Freddy Jackson in today’s America.

Another Jackson is in the news again.  Michael Jackson who was named the world’s top-earning dead celebrity this year by Forbes magazine, with $275 million in music and movie revenue.  He is beating out Lady Gaga, Madonna, and Jay Z all of them combined.  This week he released a new single (now that is a trick, releasing a single from the grave) and they swear it is HIS voice on the CD.

 

As Usual I Save The Best For Last

In the Mile High City (Denver Colorado) they are intent in reducing the size of government.  Now that is refreshing.  I understand that they will soon vote on an initiative to establishing a seven member “Extraterrestrial Affairs Commission” to handle “potential encounters or interrelations with extraterrestrial intelligent beings or their vehicles.”

Which is great, I would hate to think of government wasting money on frivolous endeavors.

OOO

Possibly Related: UFO Music

 

July 7, 2009

Something Stinks

Filed under: Oklahoma,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 4:43 AM
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Smells badSomething Is Rotten In San Jose.  A California office building was evacuated when someone tried to clear out the rotten food from the office refrigerator.  In the end, a total of 18 emergency vehicles’, 50 fireman, and numerous hazmat teams responded to the AT & T Call Center in San Jose.

All this a direct result of someone trying to clean out the office refrigerator.

The stench from the refrigerator was overwhelming and it cleared the building of some 325 employees into the parking lot, seven persons  sought medical attention at a local hospital.  Veteran firefighter Capt suspects the putrid, liquefied item was originally some kind of meat.  He also added that “sometimes meat, a dog or a human, when the all start to rot, it is a horrible thing.”

Thank you Capt. for passing that information on.

Sort of reminds me of an old joke.  A lady, selling cosmetic’s is riding up in an elevator and she has to pass gas, so she lets it fly!  She then reaches into her bag of items, and pulls out some pine scented room deodorizer and sprays it generously around the confines of the elevator. A few floors later, the doors open, and a drunk gets on. He immediately starts to sniff …. Sniff, sniff and then he turns and looks at the lady.

She says to him, “Is there anything wrong?” and the drunk replies, “Uh, I dunno.  Does it kind of smell like a pine tree farted in here to you?”

As for San Jose?  Mama always kept a open box of Arm &  Hammer in the refrig, and it seemed to do the job.  That must have been some powerful smell. It could be much worse, you could be living in India for instance.  India has 41 cities that are now currently over 1 million in population.  The rapid growth of these mega-cities is overwhelming municipal services, leaving many with mounds of rotting trash, sewage flowing directly into polluted rivers and middle class neighborhoods that are now encircled by slums.  Count your blessings.

Here is something else that stinks.

The way America is doing business is pathetic.  Now let me set the stage for you.  If you are late on a bill, you pay a penalty, if you are late on a credit card, thirty-nine bucks, late on your house, penalty and possible forfeiture.  Now I have routinely ordered stuff here lately and it was promised by a certain time, but isn’t delivered.  I ordered some plastic, promised by Friday on the third Friday I complain and they give it to me the next day.  I have some upholstery work being done, promised in two weeks, it is now in the FIFTH WEEK and I don’t know when I am going to receive it.

Now here is the rub, they take our business, and our money, but they do not deliver on time, or anything resembling close to the promised date, and they still charge us FULL PRICE for the item, when we pick it up, sometimes literally weeks later. That sucks.  It is no wonder we are considered a debt ridden cheap third world country.

Check this one out, this will scare the **** out of you.  The co-pilot of the regional air carrier Coligan Air that crashed in Buffalo in February was making about $16,000 per year.  Now consider this, the average truck driver in the USA makes about $40,000 per year and a city bus driver, $31,720.00.  I don’t know about you, but I want “well paid happy people up there in the cockpit” not someone who is worried about how he is going to pay his VISA Card or Cable TV bill.

Not being a big fan of airports and all that, I don’t believe I have all that much to worry about. You however might have reason for concern.  But for me, I know I am not flying any more, my flying days are over.  Another thing, all of this airport security, the questions, intrusion, screenings, searches is just one more way of reducing your liberty in this country.

Thank John Ashcroft and the Patriot Act, Bush and company, for that.

They are just reminding you that they can still **** with you any time they want.  American’s are like that, they will trade off what little of their freedom they have left, in exchange for the feeling … the illusion … of security. That is the way we are, in our minds, we create absolute, point-to-point cause–and-effect assumptions about things when, in fact, there’s really nothing holding those assumption in place other than our own thinking.  We are no safer now than the day when the twin towers came tumbling down, we just like to “think we are.”

Think about it.

Lot of Internet chat rooms and sites talking about the MJ (Michael Jackson) thing.  Asking people “for their opinion on it.”  Which always strikes me funny, they ask for the opinion, and when someone gives it, they flame them for it because they do not agree with it.

Let’s see …. Let’s all pool our ignorance and form an opinion.

Someone said it much better than I could.  They said:  “The rhetoric of the rant is the dominant form of public comment on the Internet, where the pithy, personal, scatological attack has become a minor art form, rather like sculpting excrement.”

That should about sum it up.

Next?

I have been invited to submit articles for a Bus Conversion Magazine in Florida.  It is nice to be recognized for your talents, and it makes one feel somewhat special.  I have often written bus related items on the side and have not posted them here.

We are soon to move to the country, and we will have no cable service or Internet.  I am not sure I want to pursue sat. Internet service or Dish TV at this time, it is kind of up in the air, I may in fact, shut it all down and retire from posting and writing altogether.

As I have a lot of things going on right now, I have not made a conscious decision as to whether or not I will do this new thing, but it is nice to be invited.

Everyone wants to be chosen or invited, it is nice to be recognized for your efforts.

OOO

May 1, 2009

Lock N Load

Filed under: Uncategorized — ldsrr91 @ 5:00 AM
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I swear this country is turning into suspicious, mean spirited, gas bags.  The really sad part is the majority of them are on radio and in a public venue.  We need to search them out and eradicate each and every one of them.  They are a scourge upon the land.  Yeah I know, “free speech and all that” but when it becomes downright mean, nasty and vindictive, it should not be allowed.

This week a conservative talker was suspended after blaming swine flu on the ‘millions of leeches’ from Mexico.  Conservative talker Jay Severin was suspended indefinitely by Boston’s WTKK-FM after using the current swine flu outbreak to attack Mexicans and immigrants. On his radio show, Severin blamed the swine flu on what he called “some of the world’s lowest of primitives in poor Mexico”:

“So now in addition to venereal disease and the other leading exports of Mexico — women with mustaches and VD — now we have swine flu. … We should be if anything surprised that Mexico has not visited upon us poxes of more various and serious types considering the number of cimminalieans already here.

[W]hen scoop up some of the world’s lowest of primitives in poor Mexico and drop it down in the middle of the United States. Poor, without skills, without language, not share our culture, not share our hygiene. … It’s millions of leeches from a primitive country. … Now they are exporting a rather more active form of disease which is the swine flu.”

Man, talk about garbage.  What happened to plain old common sense. Have we lost our sense of humanity in this country?

What's Next?

What's Next?

(Thanks to Jonco)

The weekend, I am ready!

Hopefully we may get some sunshine, it has been raining here and we needed it but I am ready for a little sun and some nice weather for a change.  Get out in the great outdoors, a little time away from the house and all the chores that seem to never go away.

If I lived in Massachusetts I could go fishing at lake Chargoggagoggmanchauggagoggchaubunagungamaugg.

Now that is a mouthful …  I cannot … nor will I attempt to even try and pronounce that one for sure.  And I thought “Massachusetts” was bad, but this one takes the cake.  Lately, believe it or not, they have found instances of road signs where this has actually been misspelled.  Hard to believe, but it is true.  One example was “Chargoggagoggmanchaoggagoggchaubunaguhgamugg.” But rest assured, the signs are to be corrected.

Here is another one I found amusing.

Tourists have routinely had their picture taken at a popular tourist attraction in the southwest corner of Colorado, even I have succumbed to this and pulled in to the spot to check it out.  I have even considered leaving a geo clue there for Yogi.   Now it seems the National Geodetic Survey has found that the Four Corners Marker where tens of thousands of American’s have smiled and said, “Cheese.”

Is in fact, in the wrong spot.

This is one of the few spots in the USA where you are supposed to be able to stand on the corner of Colorado, New Mexico , Utah, and Arizona, all at the same time.  But it turns out that it is in the wrong place, it is actually supposed to be about two and one-half miles west of its current location.  Things are not what they appear to be chapter two this week.

What is it that I truly love ……… stoopid crooks.

Enter one Daniel Duran, a Houston Texas man who allegedly robbed a bank and stuffed the bundles of cash down his pants as he raced out of the bank.  Duran was later arrested and then taken to the hospital when the dye packs inside the money exploded giving him serious burns in areas we won’t mention.

I just love stoopid crooks.

Also this week, a little order in the court when an judge in Idaho duct taped a defendants mouth shut, another new use for the tape, which is know as “The Chrome Plating of the South.”

Hard call, an Indiana police officer is suing his department for firing him because he refused to be tasered.  It is the policy of the police department to taser all officers so that they can know what 50,000 volts of electricity feels like. (Something the majority of us have always wondered about eh?)

This 54 year old officer, had a bad disc in his back, his doctor recommended that he not participate in the exercise, and he was fired.  You make the call, should this have been allowed?

100-days

Today is my sixty-third day of my new laptop, and I still cannot get used to Vista and the keyboard.  It is a real pain in the part of you that goes over the fence last.  But as this seems to be the new standard for America (100 day segments) I will keep you apprised and up to date.  Actually it is a good thing for me, because my prescriptions come in 90 day increments.

While we are at it (government and all …. Nice blend huh?  Thank you very much!)

A government watchdog group has launched nearly 20 criminal investigations related to the government’s bailout.  The special inspector-general of the bailout program is focusing on alleged wrong doing by recipients of funds from the Troubled Assets Relief Program.

He is investigating cases of possible mortgage fraud, tax evasion, and insider trading, as well as an unnamed bank that he said “was cooking their books” to qualify for bail out funds.

Is this a great country or what?

Applications for open medical marijuana dispensaries have soared since President Obama announced that the fed’s will not mess with institutions that are under California law.  In Los Angeles and Oakland alone, pot is now sold openly in thousand off storefronts.  Unemployment compensation for dealers put of work has not been reported as available at this time.

Sales of wine, beer, and other alcoholic products are on the rise something like 4.8% nationwide as more and more people stay home  and do their drinking there, saving money on restaurants and bars.  I no longer personally drink to have a good time, I only drink to silence the voices in my head.

When my company asked me to give a sample of my urine for a drug test, and they found an olive in it, well, that was the end of my drinking career and come to think of it, it didn’t help my railroading career too much either.

Legal firearm sales have escalated about 27% since the Obama folks assumed the White House.  The first three months of this year, produced about four million new background checks made by the FBI..  Gun owners are afraid that the Obama administration will impose new restrictions, so they’re buying now.

I am going to change lanes now Honey …. Cover me.

Have a good weekend, we will see you on Monday.

OOO
“The cartoon courtesy of Center for American Progress” (online)

March 19, 2009

Clear Blue Sky

Filed under: Oklahoma,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 5:28 AM
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blue-sky

Early in the morning, it is cool, not cold mind you, but cool.  That is nice, spring is in the air, it cannot be long now, but there is the distinct odor of burnt grass in the air, and another wildfire is taking its toll somewhere.  Very dry here, I cannot remember for the life of me, when it was that we received a good soaking rain, been awhile.

Another thing that I find somewhat disturbing is the color of the sky, there doesn’t seem to be any blue sky left anywhere, just this dingy Grey color, void of clouds and seemingly full of the pollution of man.

Back in the day, I would lie down in the grass and peer up into the summer sky, rich and blue, filled with white wispy clouds and I would imagine they were different animals or shapes.   I see a cow, and Indian, there is a ducky …… that kind of deal.

Now I look up and I see the remnants of yesterdays’ commute in Dallas, a cold dead gray sky, and no rain.

Getting Casual.

Another sign that spring is coming, the Idaho House waived its decorum rule for the rest of the season.  Members can take off their jackets and eat or drink on the floor of the House, they are just not allowed to smoke or spit, we can still do that here in Oklahoma, but it is evidently illegal in other parts of the country.

Not long ago I took a vow to lay off politics’ and religion on this site, and so far, I have managed to stay fairly close to the goal and within the self-imposed perimeters of good taste.  It is so hard to come in here each day and write something that is NOT political and I have adjusted to that.  It is as a matter of fact, a lot harder than I imagined it to be a few weeks back.

Mr. Obamma is going to be on the Tonight Show this evening, if you are so inclined, you can tune in there and get the straight poop from the head nin-com-poop!  Perhaps he will explain on how “giving A.I.G. billions which they in turn gave to the banks of England, Germany and France will help the AMERICAN economy” I cannot for the life of me, figure that one out.

bush-sticker

U.S. Credit Card defaults rose in February to their highest level in 20 years, with losses particularly severe at American Express and Citigroup.  AMEX came in with 8.7% and Citibank at 8.3% what I cannot figure out is why is this so bad?  Even at those rates that means at least 91% of their accounts are paid up or paying on time, seems like a rock steady business figure to me.

All around me I hear the sound of money, but I don’t have a dog-gone nickel to my name, I see a light at the end of the tunnel …. Man, I sure hope it’s not some dog-gone train!  If counted out in $1,000 bills, a million dollars would be a stack of bills approximately 4″ high.  To reach a billion dollars, that same stack of $1,000 dollar bills would have to be 358 feet tall.  To reach a trillion dollars (and remember we are up in the 12/15 trillion range now) the stack would stand 67.9 miles high!

change

This could be the reason Americans are only getting an average of 6.7 hours of sleep on weekdays, down from seven hours in 2001.  Anyone see the news piece on the janitorial position offered in Massillon, Ohio?  The job paid about $15 per hour and 700 people showed up to apply for it.  Maine is forcing people to buy one of three license’s in order to increase revenue, latest to hit the list is canoeists or kayaking.  They want $3.50 for “boat lic.fees.”  Oklahoma increases the fee for electricity by some $8 per month, cable TV switched over to this new crap, and as usual, it cost us something, about $3 a month.

Point being, “You get a $26 increase in your income this month, I sure didn’t.”

This could be the primary reason Oklahoma and Utah now lead the nation in people hanging up landlines (regular telephone service) and switching over to cell phone usage (which we have been on for about five years, once again, ahead of the curve).  At least 26% of all households in these two states have got rid of regular phone service.  As times continue to get rough, medicine and groceries will fall beside the way, as the population searches for a way to cope.

But all hope is not lost.

Washington state this week passed a new same sex marriage proposal.  It would extend domestic partners all the rights and benefits that the state offers married couples under a measure passed by both houses.  Currently only married couples are mentioned including employment pensions, and public employee benefits.  Washington State is clearly stepping out into uncharted waters when compared to the rest of the country.

gay-girls

Another good news item is the James River in Richmond Virginia is now clean enough to swim in.  Now there is a novel idea, a river you can actually swim in.  Water tests showed that fecal bacteria had dropped to acceptable levels the Department of Environmental Quality said.  Which brings me to the obvious question:  “What is an acceptable level of poo-poo kaw-kaw nothing is acceptable to me, absolutely nothing is the level I want. anyway?” I mean, gee whiz, give me a break.  That is not acceptable in any way, shape, form or manner.

And finally.

If all this fails, you can move to California, where they are proposing to tax “pot sales.”  Now if you think about it, the nation’s pot heads have been paying a really high tax for years on this product, but it was to the Mafia or Organized Crime. 

Why not pay a tax to the local government instead, put the money in the hands of all those folks who KNOW how to spend it for your public GOOD.

Which gives us about $1 billion per year in added taxes revenue for all these tax strapped states that just cannot live on billions and billions per year in collected tax revenue.

Taxing Pot Heads … I Believe I have heard it all now.  A totally new meaning to the word “Reefer Madness.”

It is now time for me to close this off, head out to the front porch and maybe see if I can borrow some “medical marijuana” from my next door neighbor with the five dogs (the people who live two doors down on public assistance) . Mailman says every time he walks by there, they are out in the garage shooting pool on their cheap table with the crooked sticks, pumping out the rap on the boom-boxes and he says …. “I smell it, no doubt about it.”

Perhaps in the spirit of the day, they will share with me?

Twist one up and then I will sit there in the spring time warmth, and ask myself whether I want to hold the bowl of love or go out there in the Universe, in search of the meaning of life.  To do this with another person or do it alone, to feel that shield of love and glow that is incredible.  Again the nagging questions of life, to enter into another drug induced deep value introspective view of shallow relationships or just go back inside and watch The View.

Another wacky Thursday in a long line of run together crazy insane days.  When you give up religion and politics’ this is what is left ……. Not much.  Kind of like this bailout routine, this financial black hole we seem to find ourselves being sucked in to.  Think about it.

socilaism

OOO

February 20, 2009

Hard Fast Rule

Filed under: Oklahoma,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 3:47 AM
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Hello, did you miss me?

I wasn’t here yesterday with all you needed to know about everything that actually mattered, I took a day off.  One hard fast rule I have is to never write when I am depressed, sad, lonely or out of sorts.  I just feel like it just naturally reflects on what you put up in a negative way.

Yesterday was one of those kind of days, so I just floated one, and did not post anything.

So here we are, sailing along briskly in our sea of anxiety this Friday morning.  Shall we stop to consider that it is just possible that Mr. Obama is just to dog-gone nice to be our President?  That Google can now eye you right down to your cotton-picking front door, that A-Rod did steroids and has confessed.  I mean who gives a rat’s patooie about A-Rod and baseball to begin with?

How about the Populist uprising demanding that CEO compensation be limited to 500K for doing a crummy job on Wall Street.  Auto sales have plunged the past 12 months, home sales, now there is a hooter for ya, nothing good to report there either.  Creationism is OK as long as it’s not taught in schools.  And if you’re trying to sell a $5 cup of coffee, well good luck with that.  Things have gotten so bad I hear that Madonna has cut off two of her entourage and let them go.

Opened up my email this morning and the first thing I see is this.  “See the 87 people that searched for “Don Smith” including:

  • 3 people in OK
  • 46 people aged 56 – 66
  • 51 men
  • 36 women
  • Get alerts when there are NEW searches!”

It appears that I do have charisma, but it is for the same-sex, that was kind of disturbing.  Nothing like coming on line early in the morning and discovering that you are no longer a “Chick Magnet” man, that is a bummer.  These things always amaze me to no end.  Must be that new math or something?  “87 people were looking for me.”

46, 55-66, 51 men, 36 women … which is missing 41 people somewhere.

Wait it gets even better.

I can have all this and more!  All I have to do is cough up $6 per month.  Yeah right.  There is another ten minutes of my life I will not get back, looking at this electronic bullsh** they send out.  It would be nice to think that I could just reach up and check “block sender” and that would be the end of it, but unfortunately, that doesn’t always work.  One pesky woman who gives me problems, came shooting in under the radar this week, and I blocked her a long time ago.  Technology creates a big hole in my life … it sucks.

We Must Be Back In Kansas Toto.

Wichita Kansas – Hispanic parents are appealing a federal judge’s ruling upholding a Catholic school’s policy that students speak only English in school. The appeal was filed by three families who sued the Diocese of Wichita seeking to end the policy at St. Anne’s Catholic School. The judge ruled in August that the policy does not in itself create a hostile learning environment.

Here is a novel idea, you don’t like it here, you don’t want to speak English, then go back to Mexico.  People that speak English in this country make more money, think about that, unless you want to be a wage-slave the rest of your lives.  You walk by a store window and glance down at the sign and it reads:  “EXPERIENCE WATIRESS REQUIERED ENGLISH ESSENTUAL” and if you cannot read that, where is this going to leave you?

This is America …We speak English.

While we are in Kansas?  The Governor of that state announced this week that they are, much like California, going down the tubes and will run out of money.  It seems that everyone is running out of money, except Washington DC, that is.  She says that she will have to dip into an $225 million surplus fund in order to make it.  Must be nice, have a million dollar “surplus stashed away somewhere.”

Meanwhile back here at the ranch, the local cable TV company informs me that switching over to digital television (that only works marginally) was more expensive than they thought it would be and they want an extra $4.50 per month from me.  Hey, why not?  I am made out of money, just like everyone else, right?

Figuring a bail out is in order for me, we have started constructing our own version of the American Hoopie in the backyard tool shed, hope to have the first models off the line soon, thus, qualifying us for some kind of compensation.

carIf that doesn’t pan out, we also have begun the new “Oklahoma Bumper Sticker Project.”  Handy, catchy sayings that you can attach to the back of your car if you live in Oklahoma.

  • I am putting on Makeup.
  • I brake randomly for no reason.
  • I am about to cause a serious accident.
  • Sorry, we are low on turn signal fluid.
  • 40 MPH in the fast lane is fast enuff.
  • I am sort of paying attention.
  • I am like totally out of it.
  • I don’t play baseball and I don’t do steroids.  But I do vote.

Colorado — One of the two men who used “thong underwear” to cover up his face during a robbery was convicted and sentenced to 12 years in the pen this week.  Maybe while he is incarcerated, they might point out to him where the “skinny part of the underwear goes” which is of course, not the part you want to conceal your face with.  Some six to eight months later, and that still makes me chuckle, it makes me smile.

Aiken South Carolina – Prosecutors said two 10-year-old boys who tried to trade marijuana to their classmates for bubble gum or desserts won’t face drug charges. Authorities said 3 grams were found on two fourth-graders after their classmates told teachers. Authorities said they don’t know where the students found the marijuana, and are not sure the students knew what they were doing was wrong.

If this doesn’t work, there is always George Bush and David Letterman.  Ganked this from CrackerBoy this week, check it out.


If none of this cheered you up I am truly sorry, I gave it my best shot. True it wasn’t much, but it was the best I got. Try and have a good weekend and remember, “Fighting over stupid things means you’re sweating the small stuff … Big time.”

OOO

“The cartoon courtesy of Center for American Progress” (online)

February 18, 2009

Wednesday Offering

Filed under: Oklahoma,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 5:38 AM
Tags: , , , , , , ,

SPRING CLEANING

SPRING CLEANING

Hump Day!  Hang in there Bucko, you almost have it made.  Another day and another dollar, here is #763 for the year from your favorite Scaramouch of Cyberspace.  Another Wednesday in a long line of middle of the week ramblin’s.

Always kind of like Wednesday, don’t really know why, just do.  Middle of the week, for a five-day wage slave in Oklahoma, and almost the weekend.

They roll the numbers on PowerBall on Wednesday, so there is always the remote possibility that you could be a Millionaire by the end of the day, chances are slim, next to nothing, but still, it could happen.

Figured yesterday’s post would generate a lot of comment traffic and no one checked in to say what they thought about it all, and that kind of surprised me.  I was absolutely sure that would be the thing that filled my middle of the week sojourn, but never the less, it did not happen.

That is the way it goes …. First your money …. And then your clothes.

You know if all our national holidays were observed on Wednesdays, we might conceivably wind up with six-day weekends.  Which is a great idea, if you have the money necessary to get through a six-day weekend, that is.

Mr. Obama signed the $787 Billion Dollar I.O.U. yesterday and I guess we could talk about that, but to tell you the truth, I am kind of sick of it.  Bankers, the economy, all of it, it just keeps going on and on, and on, stop and think about it, all of this started something like 6-7 months ago, and it keeps coming up like a day old cold pizza that you ate just before bed.

He hasn’t been in office thirty days as of today, but I am going to have something to say maybe on Friday about this and what has been going on.  That gives him at least two more days to find someone to fill the spots in the government that need filling, I hear they have not used the “Witness Protection Plan” yet, might find some suitable candidate over there?

half-dome

Changed my screen saver to Half Dome at Yosemite, an interesting place, currently being loved too death by too many visitors like a great many of our National Parks.  A truly beautiful and wonderful place, I have been there several times, there is even a spot in Yosemite that they say at the turn of the century if you stood there, long before the industrial revolution and looked hard, you could see the masts and sails of the sailing ships in San Francisco Bay close to 100 miles away.

That to me is simply amazing.

So what is it that we talk about, mid-way during the mid-week rant?  How about gasoline prices.  Why is it with the economy in ragged torn pieces continuing to crumble and the price of oil on the market plunging, that gasoline prices continue to edge upwards towards the two dollar mark?  Oil prices are down about 16% but the price of gasoline is UP and that just doesn’t seem right to me, the average, I need $20 worth type of guy here in the Heartland.

Things are so bad that assistant manager at a WalMart in St. George, Utah held his wedding this past week in the Garden Center of the store, right next to the Tiki Lamps and Barbequer accessories.  Greg Scott Ford’s bride, Corissa Otto, explained the venue by saying “We are so darned broke.”  The couple, who first met two Valentine’s Days ago, exchanged vows Saturday before a judge.  St. George is a sleepy little Mormon town tucked into the Southwest corner of Utah, which shares a common border with not only Arizona, but with Nevada too.

An Interesting place.

No free lunch this week and I had to pay my own way for a grease bowl and a hairball for lunch.  Nuts.  I read where this Bernard Madoff currently being confined to his $7 million dollar apartment in New York was being snitched off for “NINE YEARS BY A WHISTLE BLOWER” to the SEC and no one paid any attention to him, until after it all came tumbling down and the investors were wiped out.  Another current example of GOOD GOVERNMENT at work for you, the taxpayer.

Nine years.  Man, that is almost as bad as the messenger they sent to the Bush compound with news of the impending 9-11 disaster and Bush dismissing him and sent him packing because he wanted to finish his vacation.

People working in government could not find first base at Fenway Park if they were led summarily one-by-one onto the field.

Last:  “Mr. Obama and Mr. Biden, they may pull rabbits out of a hat in order to make all this work, but am almost certain that they do not have the ability to read your mind.  If they cannot do this, and something is bothering you, the poor slob picking up the tab for all this, then it would be best that you let your government partners know about it.”

If you need the telephone number … Let me know.  In the meantime … Stay Current.

OOO

“The cartoon courtesy of Center for American Progress” (online)

February 16, 2009

Heads Up

Filed under: Oklahoma,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 2:52 AM
Tags: , , , , , ,

Early in the morning, and the sun is shining, the birds are singing, and the coffee is sweet, but I know that if not consumed quickly, it will turn bitter and rank in the pot and will have to be tossed.

A part of me wants to write something poignant, something touching, something stirring this morning, but it is simply not there.  Another eloquent peroration, where I exhort the readership to “pull together against the current hardships we all face, and rally around the flag.” Today is also President’s Day, but I have “nothing to say” about that, I am not getting sucked into that …. not today anyway.

But like I said, it isn’t in the cards.  My “demons” have come to visit and they decided to stay awhile, I hate that when it happens.  So I am being careful this day, very careful.

creatures

I have been for the most part, grumpy, out of sorts, a regular bear of a guy over the weekend, having what the wife describes as “giving off bad vibes.“  And I suppose she is right.

So I try all the Dr. Phil mind games that I can think of, killing time, I ask that old now familiar question …. “Will any of this really matter a year from now” …. And a voice, deep inside of me yells ……. Ah Shaddup!

A lot of folks eating out this weekend because of the Valentines Day thing.  There are certain rules that tell you how much a restaurant will cost.  If the word cuisine appears in the advertising, you are going to be spending a lot of money.  If the word food, it will be moderately priced.  However, if the sign says “good eats” even though you’ll save a lot of money on food, your medical bills afterward might be quite high.

Kind of like the dentist.

You ever notice that “if you do not have insurance, then it is a cavity.  But if you do have insurance, then it somehow automatically turns into a root canal.”

Something happened last week, that was quite incredible, or at least I found it to be.  Lost in the shuffle of everything else it did not get a lot of media play.  Two satellites, one American and the other Soviet, ran into each other, a cosmic head-on collision if you may.

Can you imagine that?

Stop for a minute and take a solemn moment out of your life and think about how many billions or trillions of square miles are in space, how something that has virtually no beginning and no apparent end, runs forever.

And these two objects run into each other?

I mean when I read that, I just giggled and snickered for at least thirty minutes on that one.  I mean what are the odds?  It is kind of like the old story they tell up Kansas way, at the turn of the century, there were TWO REGISTERED AUTOMOBILES in the entire state of Kansas.

Two.

At noon, on a clear day, they both rounded the corner at the same time in Kansas City and had a head-on collision!  Now I ask you ….  What are the odds?

This one cracked me up too.  Birmingham mayor Larry Langford got a taste of the “real world” recently.  These politicians live in their own little “bubble world mostly of their creation” and often do not know what is really going on.  He went to the local high school to present a short speech and presentation, and was “appalled by the attitude and deportment of the local students.”

All wide-eyed and bushy tailed, clearly moved and re-dedicated to public service, he came back to city hall and immediately called for an increase of police to staff the high schools of the area during school hours.  More than 250 students have been arrested in the Birmingham area recently, including 17 just last week.

A Washington senator wants a “real sin tax” applied to certain items of a sexual nature in order to fund disabilities programs in his state.  He is proposing to tax adult magazines and video, telephone services and paraphernalia relating to S-E-X.

There you go!  They finally got around to taxing S-E-X and I thought I would never live long enough to see it, but there it is.  I just thought it would be like my momma said …. “I would go blind.”  But now I know, I will be broke and penniless too.

It is like they say ………  “If everyone is thinking alike, then somebody isn’t thinking.”

Consider the possibilities, first sex and next … Air.  I suppose the next thing will be a government paid for video on the subject for all the kids in school.  Something like this.  Warning adult material.

(This will be today’s lesson in Government or basically, what the Government is good at doing to you.  Be forewarned this is of an adult nature, so if you are home using Mom & Dad’s computer and skippin school in Birmingham Alabama, you might want to turn the sound down and close the door.)


Now if you will excuse me, I am going back to writing my dissertation on how to jiggle the toilet bowl handle.  I have to have it in by Wednesday.

OOO

RELATED:  BAD VIBES

This article meets the flammability requirements of the California bureau of home furnishings technical bulletin 117.  care should be exercised near open flame or with burning CIGARETTES; reprints can only be approved by Simon Cowel and American idol ltd and any other reproductions whether electronic or otherwise are frowned upon immensely.  All apostrophes and/or commas clearly out of place are purely coincidental.

February 10, 2009

Heavy Viewer

Filed under: Oklahoma,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 3:47 AM
Tags: , , , , ,

pb-jam

Good morning!  Here is Tuesday mornings rebarbative commentary on the state of America.  Fresh off the back-burner of the stove to you.

The Oklahoma Blogging Awards are in and Creative Endeavors did not win an award for anything other than being nominated.  We are so happy for the winners and wish them a hearty congratulations for a job well done.  It also appears that the book deal has fallen through also.

Two weeks ago I sent off a manuscript to my publisher, and put a note in with it, that said to the editor, “I have other irons in the fire, so get back to me as soon as possible on this.”  Yesterday I got his reply, he said to:  “Remove irons from fire, and insert manuscript.”

Having been nominated was a real surprise and a genuine kick in the whatever for us, and we once again, thank you for it. You can see all the winners here.

Saw that poor Polish kid from Illinois on Larry King, he is the one who got impeached last week but he still insists “he isn’t going anywhere.”  He may be more aware than he knows, if he hasn’t a clue, tell him to call Sarah Palin.  He was on The View earlier and seems to be making all the stops in a hot market.

He is something isn’t he?  All of them, I didn’t do anything, you aint got nuthin on me, other than these fifty-seven indictments and forty-two hours of taped conversations. Kind of like the poor sap they caught coming across the border with fifty pounds of weed, “The CIA planted this on me …. Honest.”

Earlier in the week, I had briefly considered applying for work in the new Obama administration and then it suddenly occurred to me,

“Silly me.  I PAY MY TAXES what was I thinking?”

After the war in Berlin, they were holding trials for war criminals.  And this general went up to this German and he said, “What are you here for.”  And the German replied, “I am innocent, these charges are a fabrication, a total lie.”  And the general went up to the second German, again, “what are you here for.”  The reply was, “I am totally innocent, there is NO justification in these charges, I shall be vindicated.”  Same with German number four.

And he went down the line to the fifth guy and asked the same question, the guy looked up and said, “I stole a jeep.”

At that time the general yelled out for a guard.  The guard readily appeared and inquired, “General?”  The General pointed out to the guy who stole the jeep and said, “Get this guy outta here, I don’t want him infecting all of these other innocent people” and he was released.

The Iraq journalist that threw the shoe at President Bush has had a statue erected in his honor in Saddam Hussein’s home town, Takkrit.  Larry the Toe Tapper Ex-senator from Utah has finally admitted that he no longer wants or desires to change his plea in the airport bathroom sex sting incident.  He concluded that it would be a futile exercise and that the legal wrangling in the case is over.  His good buddy Ted Stevens, convicted felon from Alaska agreed, no word from the hair-piece in Illinois.

bush-legacyBush loyalists announced this week that they will try to rewrite history …. Yawn.

It will read as follows:  The Colonial Period – Basic thirteen colonies, first states, the common wealth.  The Civil War Period – Brother against Brother and the abolishment of Slavery.  The New Deal Period – FDR a chicken in every pot, Hoover Dam, let’s build a National Park.  The Deficit Period – The Bush years and the hallucination period of the Republican Party.

A great many websites are calling for impeachment proceedings and justice to be served on the Bush Wrecking Crew for crimes against the American People and the U.S. Constitution.  The lynch mob mentality seems to be thriving in Cyberspace these days.  But the public generally has a short memory when it comes to stuff like this.

For instance:  JFK ordered the assassination of a foreign leader, Vietnam’s Ngo Dinh Diem, and Ronald Reagan, the paternal father of the Republican Party sold arms illegally to the anti-communists in Nicaragua.  Our sainted FDR who has recently been resurrected from the dead sent thousands of his fellow Americans into captivity after Pearl Harbor because of their Japanese ancestry and stood by and did nothing as their property was looted and done away with and they were illegally imprisoned in hastily erected prison camps nationwide.

No one wanted to put them on trial.  But then again, we didn’t have the Internet and instant communication in those days, now a days, we are civilized.

The American Dream (that is a hoot) is now shrinking.  The average home in America is now getting smaller as home builders, trying to deal with the current recession are switching to building smaller homes. Our home is about 2200 sq ft, and believe me that is too much for just two people, but it worked really good as a family.

We bought in the seventies and at that time I figured it was the perfect home.  It was our dream home, built in the middle of the golf-community.  A famous golf course, you may have heard of it:  Putt-Putt.  It’s a beautiful place, our deck overlooks the third, fourth, seventh, twelfth, and fifteenth fairways, the windmill, and the clown’s mouth.

Me and the Miss-us, we is living the dream!

One in seven American’s are not able to read this story.  Literacy gains are offset by some losses in some states and a long awaited federal study just released finds disturbing facts about our neighbors.  Some 32 million adults in the USA about one in seven are saddled with such low literacy skills that it would be tough for them to figure out a basic story line.

Most are capable of reading a comic book or a children’s picture book and have difficulty with a medications prescription side-effects leaflet.  And that is just the statistic’s for the House of Representatives, no word on the Senate at this time.

A New York Reporter admitted this week that he is a Socialist, but then again, when he went to work for the New York Times, I kind of already figured that one out myself.  Dancing With The Stars is gearing up for another season of celebrity ballroom hoofer competition, March 9th.  Get your reservations in early and don’t miss out.  American Idol continues with its 8th season and the catter-walling continues, isn’t it amazing how time flies when you are singing off key.

Or you can do like this guy in Stockholm Sweden who desired to be in the Guinness Book Of Records.

How fitting is that a drama in which a super-spy has to race the clock that he would help a fan break the record for non-stop TV watching?  Suresh Joachim has broken his own Guinness Record, clocking 72 hours in Stockholm of straight, consistent television watching.  He watched three seasons of Fox’s 24 and allegedly drank 25-30 cups of coffee.  His “previous record was 69 hours 48 minutes.”

Did you catch that?  “His previous record was …. ” — he had done this before.  Not only is this stupid, but he subjected himself to a new record watching “re-runs!”  Now that has to be dumb.

Get a life.

Okay, one more and then I am outta here!  California, where else?  A California man has been ordered not to tidy up the highway near his home.  Mario Mendz volunteered two months ago to collect litter along Route 54 near San Diego, California.  However, as the state’s adopt-A-Highway program requires a permit and that program is currently under review, he has been threatened with a citation if he picks up trash without the required permit.  Now tell me again, I forget, “why is it we need good government in this country?”

Life goes on …

000

“The cartoon courtesy of Center for American Progress” (online)

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