Discourse must be in words, and it is possible to give a name to that which is not understood nor cognoscible by human reason. Man, if that doesn’t sound impotent, nothing does.
Nice day today, little rain on the driveway and I have decided the subject should be language.
From time to time I get a kick out of Authors’ site (A Curious State Of Affairs) she has a good read, and the difference in the language is interesting. She has a vivid style and certainly a flare for the unusual and interesting.
Trying to keep up what is going on (not just here, but everywhere) I read on the BBC and a few English or European blogs, a few in Asia, I surf around quite a bit and I sometimes find words such as: Calignosity, niddering, fusby and olid, which are among two dozen archaic words that can be found in some circles.
In case you are wondering, the above words mean, darkness, cowardly, squat, and foul smelling, respectively. And of course … They just gave my spelling checker the electronic equivalent of a stroke as I typed them.
Strange expressions to the average American. I understand they are even listed in some British dictionaries. I suppose in the future, if they don’t get more use, they will remove them. Off-hand, I can think of about a half-dozen words in our dictionaries that should not be there, Joe Biden uses them all the time. (He patiently explains them to Bush)
We need to update our language dictionaries also.
Now Cup Cake (my wife) is Asian, and she speaks five languages. She says that English is the easiest to learn or use, as she puts it, “It is easy, you just make it up” as you go along. It tickles me to listen to her and her sister talk to each other, as they talk, they mix Chinese and English together, as some words in Chinese do not translate into English and visa-versa.
Recently someone in Madrid, Spain, linked to this site and I ventured over there to check it out, the entire site was in Spanish! Not a word of English and it made me wonder about all the other sites this stuff goes to, is anyone translating it? We are currently being read in over 80 countries worldwide now.
Language is a funny thing.
For instance I could type: fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can. i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno’t mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! If you can raed tihs forwrad it.
I would hazard a guess, that most of you got that. (There! Take that you nasty ol’ spellin checker!) Man what a bummer it would be if everyone conversed in that manner. It’s a safe bet that no one wants to receive a card or letter that is written like the above ….
[ If you could not read it? It is: If you can read this, you have a strange mind too. Can you read this? Only 55 people out of 100 can. I cannot believe that I could actually understand what I was reading. The phenomenal power of the human mind, according to a research at Cambridge University, it doesn't matter in what order the letters in a word are, the only important thing is that the first and last letter be in the right place. The rest can be a total miss, and you can still read it without a problem. This is because the human mind does not read every letter by itself, but the word as a whole. Amazing huh? Yeah, and I always thought that spelling was important. If you can read this forward it. ]
Dave Barry, one of my favorite humorists used to do items occasionally on “Mr. Language Person” and I always enjoyed them immensely. Because language is important in our day to day lives. Communication is essential in this day and age, an integral part of society.
For instance: A doctor was at the mall, and he happened to notice one of his elderly patients walking arm and arm with this good looking blond woman. As the patient approached the doctor he smiled real big and said to him, “Hello Doc, I am out taking advantage of your advice you gave me.” And the doctor inquired, “What advice are you referring to?” And the old man said, “You said to find me a Hot Mama and be cheerful. And that is what I am doing.”
The doctor smiled and said, “No you have it wrong. I said, you have a heart murmur, be careful.”
Communication as I said, is very important. Not long ago, I too found myself at the mall, and this shapely wonderful looking girl came towards me and she had a tight fitting T-Shirt on and on the front of it lettered in big bold type was the word … “Guess.”
So I said implants? And she slapped me.
Language as you can see, is important. Or as my neighbor would say ….. “Why cain’t everybody speak American, like the rest of us?”
If none of this works for you, then you can go to Noslang.com, the internet slang dictionary and translator, which will help all of you parents out there to stay hip. The site’s translator interprets “geek speek” (there you go Brother John! There is hope for me yet) and common Internet acronyms, such as TSWC (tell someone who cares), WWCND (What would Chuck Norris Do?). It also features the top 25 slang words “parents should know” and a quiz to find if you’re “CLT” (Cool Like That).
As usual, in any language, I have said too much.
Have a great weekend.