Creative Endeavors, The Home of BoxcarOkie.com

February 16, 2009

Heads Up

Filed under: Oklahoma,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 2:52 AM
Tags: , , , , , ,

Early in the morning, and the sun is shining, the birds are singing, and the coffee is sweet, but I know that if not consumed quickly, it will turn bitter and rank in the pot and will have to be tossed.

A part of me wants to write something poignant, something touching, something stirring this morning, but it is simply not there.  Another eloquent peroration, where I exhort the readership to “pull together against the current hardships we all face, and rally around the flag.” Today is also President’s Day, but I have “nothing to say” about that, I am not getting sucked into that …. not today anyway.

But like I said, it isn’t in the cards.  My “demons” have come to visit and they decided to stay awhile, I hate that when it happens.  So I am being careful this day, very careful.

creatures

I have been for the most part, grumpy, out of sorts, a regular bear of a guy over the weekend, having what the wife describes as “giving off bad vibes.“  And I suppose she is right.

So I try all the Dr. Phil mind games that I can think of, killing time, I ask that old now familiar question …. “Will any of this really matter a year from now” …. And a voice, deep inside of me yells ……. Ah Shaddup!

A lot of folks eating out this weekend because of the Valentines Day thing.  There are certain rules that tell you how much a restaurant will cost.  If the word cuisine appears in the advertising, you are going to be spending a lot of money.  If the word food, it will be moderately priced.  However, if the sign says “good eats” even though you’ll save a lot of money on food, your medical bills afterward might be quite high.

Kind of like the dentist.

You ever notice that “if you do not have insurance, then it is a cavity.  But if you do have insurance, then it somehow automatically turns into a root canal.”

Something happened last week, that was quite incredible, or at least I found it to be.  Lost in the shuffle of everything else it did not get a lot of media play.  Two satellites, one American and the other Soviet, ran into each other, a cosmic head-on collision if you may.

Can you imagine that?

Stop for a minute and take a solemn moment out of your life and think about how many billions or trillions of square miles are in space, how something that has virtually no beginning and no apparent end, runs forever.

And these two objects run into each other?

I mean when I read that, I just giggled and snickered for at least thirty minutes on that one.  I mean what are the odds?  It is kind of like the old story they tell up Kansas way, at the turn of the century, there were TWO REGISTERED AUTOMOBILES in the entire state of Kansas.

Two.

At noon, on a clear day, they both rounded the corner at the same time in Kansas City and had a head-on collision!  Now I ask you ….  What are the odds?

This one cracked me up too.  Birmingham mayor Larry Langford got a taste of the “real world” recently.  These politicians live in their own little “bubble world mostly of their creation” and often do not know what is really going on.  He went to the local high school to present a short speech and presentation, and was “appalled by the attitude and deportment of the local students.”

All wide-eyed and bushy tailed, clearly moved and re-dedicated to public service, he came back to city hall and immediately called for an increase of police to staff the high schools of the area during school hours.  More than 250 students have been arrested in the Birmingham area recently, including 17 just last week.

A Washington senator wants a “real sin tax” applied to certain items of a sexual nature in order to fund disabilities programs in his state.  He is proposing to tax adult magazines and video, telephone services and paraphernalia relating to S-E-X.

There you go!  They finally got around to taxing S-E-X and I thought I would never live long enough to see it, but there it is.  I just thought it would be like my momma said …. “I would go blind.”  But now I know, I will be broke and penniless too.

It is like they say ………  “If everyone is thinking alike, then somebody isn’t thinking.”

Consider the possibilities, first sex and next … Air.  I suppose the next thing will be a government paid for video on the subject for all the kids in school.  Something like this.  Warning adult material.

(This will be today’s lesson in Government or basically, what the Government is good at doing to you.  Be forewarned this is of an adult nature, so if you are home using Mom & Dad’s computer and skippin school in Birmingham Alabama, you might want to turn the sound down and close the door.)


Now if you will excuse me, I am going back to writing my dissertation on how to jiggle the toilet bowl handle.  I have to have it in by Wednesday.

OOO

RELATED:  BAD VIBES

This article meets the flammability requirements of the California bureau of home furnishings technical bulletin 117.  care should be exercised near open flame or with burning CIGARETTES; reprints can only be approved by Simon Cowel and American idol ltd and any other reproductions whether electronic or otherwise are frowned upon immensely.  All apostrophes and/or commas clearly out of place are purely coincidental.

February 15, 2009

Speak English

Filed under: Oklahoma,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 7:44 PM

People, immigrants (legal or otherwise) do not learn English because we cater to them under this Political Correctness crap and do not make them apply themselves.

There … I said it … And I don’t really care who doesn’t like it.

We print the ballot up in California in thirteen languages for cryin’ out loud.  We put up signage in their own native tongue in our stores and public buildings, we coddle them and at the same time, we cripple them.

If they do not speak the language then they do not make or earn as much income as English speaking citizens for example.  Doing our best to accommodate instead of “educate” we do them a great disservice.

Every day in this country you see it.

Oklahoma prints the drivers lic test in Spanish, they hold classes in Spanish teaching everyone how to sign up for public assistance, SSI … If it wasn’t so pathetic, it would be a joke.  One mayor of a small Oklahoma town went as far as to say, “We all OWE it to these people to speak their language” recently on a local news station.

That’s garbage and that town needs a new mayor.

(This is the point where all of you get stirred up and send me your heated emails … Get busy … We are as usual open.  Our operators are standing by to take your complaints and log your calls)

OOO

February 14, 2009

Luv Day

Filed under: humor,Oklahoma,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 5:21 AM
Tags: , , ,

i-love-you

Saying “I Love You” is one of the most basic and simple forms of giving.

A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds,

‘What does love mean?’

The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined.  See what you think.

‘When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn’t bend over and paint her toenails anymore.
So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That’s love.’

Rebecca- age 8

‘When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different.
You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.’

Billy – age 4

‘Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other.’

Karl – age 5

‘Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs.’

Chrissy – age 6

‘Love is what makes you smile when you’re tired.’

Terri – age 4

‘Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.’

Danny – age 7

‘Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more.
My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss’

Emily – age 8

‘Love is what’s in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen.’

Bobby – age 7

‘If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,’

Nikka – age 6

‘Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday.’

Noelle – 7

‘Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well.’

Tommy – age 6

‘During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling.

He was the only one doing that. I wasn’t scared anymore..’

Cindy – age 8

‘My mommy loves me more than anybody
You don’t see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night.’

Clare – age 6

‘Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.’

Elaine-age 5

‘Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford.’

Chris – age 7

‘Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day.’

Mary Ann – age 4

‘I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones.’

Lauren – age 4

‘When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.’ (what an image)

Karen – age 7

This one is fabulous!
‘Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn’t think it’s gross.’

Mark – age 6

‘You really shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.’

Jessica – age 8

And the final one

The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife.

Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman’s yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there.

When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said,

‘Nothing, I just helped him cry’

Never miss a chance to say

“I Love You.”

OOO

RELATED: You Don’t Smell Like Flowers (audio)

February 13, 2009

Welcome To The Heartland

Filed under: humor,Oklahoma,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 8:42 AM
Tags: , , ,

geezer

Having just finished watching the local news, I am throughly convinced that there is a good reason why “second cousins in Oklahoma are not allowed to marry each other.”  I find the news appalling and that is about the only good thing I can say about it.

THINGS YOU WOULD POSSIBLY NEVER HEAR AN OKIE SAY ON THE NEWS CHANNEL:

Duct tape won’t fix that.  We don’t keep firearms in this house.  Can you tell me where the library is?

Somebody painted Darleen’s  name on the water tower again
Our family is full of Democrats

You can’t feed that to the dog.
I thought Graceland was tacky.
No kids in the back of the pick-up – it’s not safe.

Wrasslin’s fake.
Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?
We’re vegetarians.  I am saving my money for the gun show at the fairgrounds.

Curlers is okay Maxine, this aint no social event
I’ll have grapefruit instead of biscuits and gravy.
Who’s Richard Petty?

Me and Daddy are both in the 6th grade next year. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.  Give him some bubble wrap I aint got no money for real toys.

You want to “Super Size” them french fries for the wife.
Deer heads detract from the decor.  I want a “real woman” like that Dolly Parton look-a-like down at the tire store.

Stick your hand in the hole, wiggle your fingers, noodlin is fun
Spitting is such a nasty habit.  He’s a pretty smart kid, jus don’t have no edumaycayshun.

It’s an Armadillo, they taste just like chicken.  Don’t toss that out the window, I will find a trashcan for it.  No!  B’cause she is your second cousin that’s why.

God takes care of us Baptists, every motel we checked into had a bible in the drawer.  It’s a proven scientific fact that a pick-em-up gets better fuel mileage when you run with the tailgate down, everyone knows that.

I want one that is Mo Betta than thet.

It’s a big city, kind of like a Super Center.
Trim the fat off that steak.
The tires on that truck are too big.

Turn that Boom Box down I caint here ya.
Little Debbie snack cakes have too many fat grams, I am sticking with the Twinkies.

Checkmate, Crown me, I win..
She’s too old to be wearing a bikini.

Does the salad bar have them bean sprouts?
Hey, here’s an episode of “Hee Haw” that we haven’t seen.
I don’t have a favorite college team.

Food tastes better when you are wearin’ a ballcap

Them pedal pushers don’t make your butt look big
Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the side.
Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Darla.

Elvis who?

You shore you gave me the right change?

Friday the 13th, best be careful if you are the superstitious type, at least that is the way I understand it.  Today could be my unlucky day, I am not sure, but I am going to play it by ear and kind of stay close to the house.  Something terrible might happen today, perhaps like Al Roker walking into a Krispy Kreme donut shop and going nuts, gorging himself on six cartons of lemon custards.  Then all the staples in his stomach pop at the same time, killing six on duty police officers!

Perhaps I should not even be in here writing today, I am not in a good mood, kind of down in the dumper for some reason, and I am ignoring a hard fast rule, “never write anything when you do not feel like writing.”  So this could very well go either way today, luck of the draw.

How about a quick quiz?  Why not, you are at work, and you are not working, you are reading this, so you have a little time to take a quick test, b’sides, it beats working.

Male or Female?

You might not have known this, but a lot of non-living objects are actually either male or female? Here are some examples:

  • FREEZER BAGS: They are male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.
  • PHOTOCOPIERS: These are female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again. They are an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can also wreak havoc if you push the wrong Buttons.
  • TIRES: Tires are male, because they go bald easily and are often over inflated.
  • HOT AIR BALLOONS: Also a male object, because to get them to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under their butt.
  • SPONGES: These are female, because they are soft, squeezable and retain water.
  • WEB PAGES: Female, because they’re constantly being looked at and frequently getting hit on.
  • TRAINS: Definitely male, because they always use the same old lines for picking up people.
  • EGG TIMERS: Egg timers are female because, over time, all the weight shifts to the bottom.
  • HAMMERS: Male, because in the last 5000 years, they’ve hardly changed at all, and are occasionally handy to have around.
  • THE REMOTE CONTROL: Female. Hah! You probably thought it would be male, but consider this: It easily gives a man pleasure, he’d be lost without it, and while he doesn’t always know which buttons to push, he just keeps trying.

Why is it we all live in a “right handed world?”  think about it, all my shirt pockets have the place in the pocket for the writing pen in the left hand pocket.  Why?  Because you reach over for your pen to write with and use your right hand to do so.

Gotta go now, time for Bodywatch, this is a new series beginning with a special this morning and a new regular time later on tonight.  Tonight’s program focuses on stress, exercise, nutrition, and sex, with that basketball guy, Dennis somebody who has all the body piercing and likes to dress in women’s clothes, Dr. Ruth that little short woman who knows where it is all at and where it is that you are supposed to put it, in order for it to reach maximum potential and of course Larry King will be along to discuss it all later on, as soon as he is thru interviewing the now deposed once was governor of the Chicago-land Area.

Check your local listings.  Have to run now, time for Rachael and I never miss Rachael.

Yeah I know … Don’t send me no letters.

Have A Great Weekend

OOO


February 12, 2009

Morning Sampler

Filed under: humor,Oklahoma,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 3:43 AM
Tags: , ,

middle-class

Where do we start, how about the lottery?  I found this on the lottery site, “would you like the winning numbers delivered to you on your cellphone?” what a stupid question, “Yeah sure, I will take the WINNING NUMBERS any way I can get them.”  Dumb.

Really dumb.

Here is a great site, it has everything that you could possibly need, all of it there, right at your finger tips.  “All My Faves” Along with that, if you are a news junkie, then this site The News Museum, would appeal to you also.  Check them both out, we will be right here when you get back.

Doubling Down

Gamblers have a profound tendency to “double down” when things go bad figuring that if they double their bets, when the odds do change in their favor, they won’t be so far behind, and actually find themselves a little ahead.  Unfortunately for most gamblers, this is not a winning strategy and often it leads to even more problems.  Our president is fixing to “double down” on this economic blunder and give the banks $1.5 trillion more.

If you remember we predicted they would be back for more, but who would have ever guessed it would have been this soon?

So now we are going to double down. Which is fine, it is supposed to work in theory, might even produce the desired results he is looking for.  But like the gambler, he is going to find that it is not enough to keep this sinking ship (the banks) afloat or make them seaworthy again.  Deficit spending doesn’t work, and when they have the T-Bill auction and it fails miserably, then the point will come screaming home like a fast car out of control.

Perhaps it is just me, but I fail to see where “giving a tax cut to people who are basically out of job” is going to help the country.  I just don’t get it.

But then again, there are a lot of things that I do not understand, like bailing out the auto companies.  One of those popular beliefs in this country is the belief that “they just don’t make them like they used to.”  But if you step back from it and take a good look, you will see that “yes they do, they still make them like they used to, they just don’t sell ‘em anymore.  They still make ‘em and now days, they keep ‘em.”  Big difference.

Valentines Day

That estrogen enriched illegal holiday sponsored by florists and chocolate companies worldwide is on Saturday, don’t forget to get the little lady, the significant other, that special person in your life something to show your appreciation and of course your love.  A lot of guys will forget or buy something stupid like lingerie, which is not for her, but for you.

Most men do not get the point, kind of like a skinny, patchy-furred monkey in a Mango tree in South America, wanking away and not having a clue, they could care less about partner gratification and emotional needs of the spouse.

Stopping to take a pause, I think back to a long time ago, when she would come home on her lunch break and she would wake me up (I was working graveyards then, sleeping in the day time) and we would get friendly with each other.  Then came the kids, kids put a damper on the lovemaking, they are God’s punishment for enjoying sex, that is what they are.

Now we are just old and comfortable with each other, every now and then I meet her in the hallway and I smile and she acts like she recognizes me, or at least I think she has accepted the fact that I do live here.

I got this video in email this week on women drivers and I thought I would post it for the girls down in Idabel, Oklahoma, a place where three point six billion people have never been before.  It is awfully humorous and it is offered in the spirit of love – like I said, “it is Valentines Day” and most men, do not have a clue.

Suzanne Sommers shoots up her “girlfriend.”

Been awhile since I have been accused of being a “media whore” so I will talk about Suzanne Sommers on Oprah the other day.  Anyone see that?  She used to play Krissy on Three’s Company until she made a bad career move.  The girl is 62 years old, and like a bottle of fine wine, is still getting better as she ages.  Her goal is to live to be 110 and to be coherent and lucid at that point in life.

She starts off breakfast with 40 pills, 15 of them ground up into this terribly looking yellow concoction that she makes into a breakfast shake.  Now for the really ecccccccky part, she then gives herself a shot in the vagina with various hormones!  (I would hazard a guess that isn’t all that pleasant a procedure, just thinking about it makes me break out in a cold sweat)  At bedtime she takes another 20 or more pills and all the time she insists that “she isn’t any kind of fanatic about all this.”  Yeah sure.

Heather Has A Problem

Heather Mills, the girl that was on Dancing With The Stars and recently divorced from Sir Paul McCartney says the “I get asked out all the time” and she cannot figure it out.  The 41 year old dance, model, gay divorcee marvels at the peculiarities of dating.  “My girlfriends who are better looking than me, say how in the hell does this happen?” and I have no answers for them.

“It could be that it is because I am so comfortable with myself.”

Uh huh, sure.

Might be the fact that she netted some $40 million in the divorce settlement, you think that might have something to do with all this?  (Please insert appropriate dumb blonde joke here)

So that are it boys & girls, in the spirit of Valentine’s Day I leave you with this.

You Don’t Smell Like Flowers

000

RELATED: Timber Wear

“The cartoon courtesy of Center for American Progress” (online)

February 11, 2009

Rangel Wrangling

Filed under: humor,Oklahoma,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 3:41 AM
Tags: , , , ,

uncle-sam

We want

YOU

to pay

YOUR taxes.

Here is an interesting question for you this morning.

“If powerful, all knowing, politicians do not pay interest or a penalty on NOT paying taxes, then why should you?”

Think about it.  When they are cornered and taken to task on it, the most frequently used excuse is “I forgot.”

What we call in this neck of the woods, “the Okie Defense.”

Here is an example:  Judge:  “Didn’t you know it was illegal in this county, to rob a bank?”

Okie:  “Uh, I forgot, your honor.”

That should clear it up pretty quickly.

Rep. John Carter a Texas Republican has introduced legislation calling it the “Rangel Rule.”  It was named after Charles Rangel, the powerful Democratic chairman of the Ways and Means Committee.

Rangel failed for years to pay taxes on rental properties that he owned in the Caribbean; after he was exposed, he apologized and paid up, but has not had to fork over any interest or penalties or suffer any kind of prosecution.  Did Daschille pay a penalty, get any legal hassle?  How about some recent examples that quickly come to mind, take a minute now, think.

See what I mean?  Now if this had been you, well, I am sure you would agree the circumstances would be much, much different.

The new treasury secretary, Timothy Geithner, recently came clean about his own failure to pay taxes and master the art of using Turbo Tax.  He failed to pay federal taxes and he too, “has now paid up with no penalties and no prosecution.”

Now make no mistake about it, if these “oversights” as they are prone to describe it, would have occurred or happened to you, do you for one second believe they would have said, “Oh, don’t worry about it.  Everyone forgets every now and then, go back to watching your the Best Of Sonny & Cher DVD’s and Have A Nice Day.”

Most likely you would have been offered some kind of plea agreement or threat of jail, a hefty fine, and a serious decline in your quality of life statistic’s for some time to come in the near future.

Now I did not set out to depress or discourage, so I guess I should inject at this point the good news.  At this point I guess I should definitely say there is good news.  So here it is, this is the good news:  You can take solace as a convicted tax-cheat that “federal prisons are a lot nicer than state prisons”

I don’t want you to think all of this is “bad news.”

So as you can quickly realize, for a tax-cheat or a wanna-be tax-cheat, this “Rangel Rule” is a good legislative item.  This is a good deal, stop and take time to consider it, put all this non-sense about economic stimulus, building new schools, buying computers for Social Security, bridges and roads, and streets, wrapping the Golden Gate Bridge in Toliet Paper (the arts), and poor old Aunt Martha who is shut down in Miami eating dog food ….

Put this and all this other crap on the back burner, and take into consideration the implications this pro-posed legislation could have on your sordid, rotten, miserable tax bleeding existence.

You could for instance, if this passes, write on your next income tax return, “Rangel Rule” across the top of it and be done with it.

You would be by this one gesture, find yourself exempted from federal and state taxes owed at that time.  Not only would this “restore equal treatment for working Americans, it would also keep more money in the hands of the taxpayers.”

Give the taxpayers the money, which is a novel concept that everyone in Washington DC seems to have not grasped at this time — the most efficient way to get our economy moving again.

And remember … Start the day with love … Live the day with love … End the day with love.

After all, it is about the only thing left in this country that is still free.

000

February 10, 2009

Heavy Viewer

Filed under: Oklahoma,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 3:47 AM
Tags: , , , , ,

pb-jam

Good morning!  Here is Tuesday mornings rebarbative commentary on the state of America.  Fresh off the back-burner of the stove to you.

The Oklahoma Blogging Awards are in and Creative Endeavors did not win an award for anything other than being nominated.  We are so happy for the winners and wish them a hearty congratulations for a job well done.  It also appears that the book deal has fallen through also.

Two weeks ago I sent off a manuscript to my publisher, and put a note in with it, that said to the editor, “I have other irons in the fire, so get back to me as soon as possible on this.”  Yesterday I got his reply, he said to:  “Remove irons from fire, and insert manuscript.”

Having been nominated was a real surprise and a genuine kick in the whatever for us, and we once again, thank you for it. You can see all the winners here.

Saw that poor Polish kid from Illinois on Larry King, he is the one who got impeached last week but he still insists “he isn’t going anywhere.”  He may be more aware than he knows, if he hasn’t a clue, tell him to call Sarah Palin.  He was on The View earlier and seems to be making all the stops in a hot market.

He is something isn’t he?  All of them, I didn’t do anything, you aint got nuthin on me, other than these fifty-seven indictments and forty-two hours of taped conversations. Kind of like the poor sap they caught coming across the border with fifty pounds of weed, “The CIA planted this on me …. Honest.”

Earlier in the week, I had briefly considered applying for work in the new Obama administration and then it suddenly occurred to me,

“Silly me.  I PAY MY TAXES what was I thinking?”

After the war in Berlin, they were holding trials for war criminals.  And this general went up to this German and he said, “What are you here for.”  And the German replied, “I am innocent, these charges are a fabrication, a total lie.”  And the general went up to the second German, again, “what are you here for.”  The reply was, “I am totally innocent, there is NO justification in these charges, I shall be vindicated.”  Same with German number four.

And he went down the line to the fifth guy and asked the same question, the guy looked up and said, “I stole a jeep.”

At that time the general yelled out for a guard.  The guard readily appeared and inquired, “General?”  The General pointed out to the guy who stole the jeep and said, “Get this guy outta here, I don’t want him infecting all of these other innocent people” and he was released.

The Iraq journalist that threw the shoe at President Bush has had a statue erected in his honor in Saddam Hussein’s home town, Takkrit.  Larry the Toe Tapper Ex-senator from Utah has finally admitted that he no longer wants or desires to change his plea in the airport bathroom sex sting incident.  He concluded that it would be a futile exercise and that the legal wrangling in the case is over.  His good buddy Ted Stevens, convicted felon from Alaska agreed, no word from the hair-piece in Illinois.

bush-legacyBush loyalists announced this week that they will try to rewrite history …. Yawn.

It will read as follows:  The Colonial Period – Basic thirteen colonies, first states, the common wealth.  The Civil War Period – Brother against Brother and the abolishment of Slavery.  The New Deal Period – FDR a chicken in every pot, Hoover Dam, let’s build a National Park.  The Deficit Period – The Bush years and the hallucination period of the Republican Party.

A great many websites are calling for impeachment proceedings and justice to be served on the Bush Wrecking Crew for crimes against the American People and the U.S. Constitution.  The lynch mob mentality seems to be thriving in Cyberspace these days.  But the public generally has a short memory when it comes to stuff like this.

For instance:  JFK ordered the assassination of a foreign leader, Vietnam’s Ngo Dinh Diem, and Ronald Reagan, the paternal father of the Republican Party sold arms illegally to the anti-communists in Nicaragua.  Our sainted FDR who has recently been resurrected from the dead sent thousands of his fellow Americans into captivity after Pearl Harbor because of their Japanese ancestry and stood by and did nothing as their property was looted and done away with and they were illegally imprisoned in hastily erected prison camps nationwide.

No one wanted to put them on trial.  But then again, we didn’t have the Internet and instant communication in those days, now a days, we are civilized.

The American Dream (that is a hoot) is now shrinking.  The average home in America is now getting smaller as home builders, trying to deal with the current recession are switching to building smaller homes. Our home is about 2200 sq ft, and believe me that is too much for just two people, but it worked really good as a family.

We bought in the seventies and at that time I figured it was the perfect home.  It was our dream home, built in the middle of the golf-community.  A famous golf course, you may have heard of it:  Putt-Putt.  It’s a beautiful place, our deck overlooks the third, fourth, seventh, twelfth, and fifteenth fairways, the windmill, and the clown’s mouth.

Me and the Miss-us, we is living the dream!

One in seven American’s are not able to read this story.  Literacy gains are offset by some losses in some states and a long awaited federal study just released finds disturbing facts about our neighbors.  Some 32 million adults in the USA about one in seven are saddled with such low literacy skills that it would be tough for them to figure out a basic story line.

Most are capable of reading a comic book or a children’s picture book and have difficulty with a medications prescription side-effects leaflet.  And that is just the statistic’s for the House of Representatives, no word on the Senate at this time.

A New York Reporter admitted this week that he is a Socialist, but then again, when he went to work for the New York Times, I kind of already figured that one out myself.  Dancing With The Stars is gearing up for another season of celebrity ballroom hoofer competition, March 9th.  Get your reservations in early and don’t miss out.  American Idol continues with its 8th season and the catter-walling continues, isn’t it amazing how time flies when you are singing off key.

Or you can do like this guy in Stockholm Sweden who desired to be in the Guinness Book Of Records.

How fitting is that a drama in which a super-spy has to race the clock that he would help a fan break the record for non-stop TV watching?  Suresh Joachim has broken his own Guinness Record, clocking 72 hours in Stockholm of straight, consistent television watching.  He watched three seasons of Fox’s 24 and allegedly drank 25-30 cups of coffee.  His “previous record was 69 hours 48 minutes.”

Did you catch that?  “His previous record was …. ” — he had done this before.  Not only is this stupid, but he subjected himself to a new record watching “re-runs!”  Now that has to be dumb.

Get a life.

Okay, one more and then I am outta here!  California, where else?  A California man has been ordered not to tidy up the highway near his home.  Mario Mendz volunteered two months ago to collect litter along Route 54 near San Diego, California.  However, as the state’s adopt-A-Highway program requires a permit and that program is currently under review, he has been threatened with a citation if he picks up trash without the required permit.  Now tell me again, I forget, “why is it we need good government in this country?”

Life goes on …

000

“The cartoon courtesy of Center for American Progress” (online)

February 9, 2009

Defying Logic

Filed under: Oklahoma,politics,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 3:56 AM
Tags: , , ,

crater-lake

Changed out my desktop screen picture to Crater Lake Oregon over the weekend.  If I stare at it long enough, and hard enough, I can almost transport myself thru time and space, and see my tired, old fat butt sitting on the rim of the crater staring off into space and wondering what in the —- is going on?

I am finding it increasingly harder and harder to find the rainbow in all of this.  I am referring to of course this S.O.S. (Save Our Stimulus) that is emanating out of Washington DC.  I’m sure by now you’ve heard of the almost one trillion dollar stimulus package moving through the U.S. Senate.  But it appears to be something other than what they say it is, it doesn’t really appear to be a stimulus bill.

It’s (or appears to be) a big government, big corruption, and big pork bill.  More pococurante hogwash cooked up by our electorate.

Among many other wasteful, non-stimulative projects, it includes $650 million for digital TV coupons, $1 billion for climate satellite and habitat restoration programs, and $600 million to replace a portion of the federal government vehicle fleet. $50 million for the arts?  C’mon.  Does any of this keep YOU gainfully employed in the foreseeable future, do you see any improvement in your quality of life issues.

I doubt it.

Perhaps it is just me, but I see this bill, as currently written, is not worthy of our support.  How do you take “Jump Start The Economy” and end up with an 800 page document?  Someone needs to tell our elected officials “that they need to insert the square pegs in the SQUARE HOLES and not the other way around.”

A recent Gallup Poll found that 54% of Americans either want to see major changes to the current plan, or they outright reject it.  Other surveys are also indicating that public support is plummeting.   Politicians can call it stimulus and they can call it change, but it’s just more of the same – and the American people are starting to realize it.

Which is in itself an outright miracle, when you watch any media channel for a report on this.  Reporter:  “Where does the President stand on that?”

Media information official, “It’s not where some people say where the President is, or people who are not even in the government who claim to know where the President is.  The President hasn’t decided yet where he is.  So I think we’ve been able to put it into perspective.”

Meanwhile, security escorts you to the front gate, they take your name tag and ID Badge and tell you to hit the bricks, some 650,000 American’s at last count recently.

Newspaper, television and media reporting of the inauguration was mostly glowing with little criticism of the estimated $42-$45 million expenditure in tough times and so-called austerity.  How come?  Journalists who are supposed to be the watch dogs of society, seem to have got caught up in the hype and hysteria of the moment, and the outright celebration of our first black president.  They seem to preoccupied with reporting the mood of the moment and ignoring stark realities.

Almost as pathetic as it was after 9-11, when they all picked up the drum and banged away on the Weapons of Mass Destruction for Mr. Bush’s war.

Every time you’re exposed to advertising or politics’ in this country, you are made acutely aware that our biggest product and most profitable business is still the manufacture of BS, packaging, distribution and marketing of BS.  This is big business in this country.

High Quality, prime, Grade-A, USA Certified BS.

That’s why the time to act is now. With so much at stake, our elected officials need to hear from us.  Here is what you can do – pick up your phone and call your Senators right now at 202-224-3121. Let them know exactly what you think about how they intend to spend your hard-earned money. (Frankly, if they really wanted to jump start the economy, they would give the lion’s share of this back to the tax payer, and they would stimulate the economy by exercising purchasing power in the market place … Pork isn’t going to do it.)

In times of great challenge, it is often reassuring to look back at some of our greatest leaders. But realistically speaking, that isn’t going to fly either.  They simply are not there.

If this is the so-called promised “change” we have all been looking for, it is cleverly masked and disguised as something else.  This isn’t change, far from it, this is the same old dog and pony show and appears to be destined to fail.

000

February 8, 2009

Bad Vibes

Filed under: Uncategorized — ldsrr91 @ 7:15 AM

creatures

I was not in a good mood over the weekend, Valentine’s Day does that to me, I am not a big subscriber to this holiday, if it I have not made that evident, I should have.

So here is the big secret for the day.  I don’t like Valentine’s Day … I have not liked it for quite sometime … most of my adult life.  But I figured, “why spoil it for all those who do, so I have mainly stayed quiet about it.”

If you are a small child in school, and are sent home with the list, a compulsory file of everyone you are supposed to provide a card for, that is especially cruel.

There are kids who are not going to get a lot of Valentines in this routine or practice and they are going to feel left out and let down.

If you are in a marriage that is on the skids and not doing all that well in these trying times, this is just another ugly reminder that somehow you failed, and you are not going to rejoice or feel like celebrating that.

The mailbox filled up with all this “heart stuff” and copious amounts of emotional fanfare, even a missive chewing me out for not acknowledging the correspondence.

Why is it that people send out tons of this stuff, and then you receive it and they believe you are automatically bound to respond with something?  I don’t understand that.  I got some negative stuff too, so I am not the only one who feels as they do about this holiday.

Well, I need to get off this, this, such as it is, will do no one any good at all.

My uncle called Saturday night, at 87 years of age, I have to admit, he has become quite the character in my life.  Big night in town, he was going down to the lodge to do some “belly rubbing” as he puts it.  That is his way of saying, “dancing.”  He was busy telling me about this “young thing” that he had met, pretty light on her feet, only weighs 100 lbs and after a couple of shots (bourbon whiskey) “she can get pretty frisky” as he put it.

Then he said, “she is only sixty-years old.”

Over the weekend I did read a well written piece on blended families.  You can read it here.  A Test Of Love. I didn’t make any comments on it, as the first nine or ten people ahead of me were all women, and I didn’t want to be the only guy weighing in on the issue.

For a long time now I have wanted to write something serious about dysfunctional families, the blended family, and then I read this piece.  It is my opinion, especially here lately, that most of this country, the political system, all of it seems to be operating in the dysfunctional arena of life.

Here is a prime example of it.

This bozo, Madoff, the guy that created the Ponzi scheme and made off with $50 billion in other people’s assets?  He had been reported to the SEC by a whistle-blower for over NINE YEARS and no one took the guy seriously. So it just continued on and on, to its eventual downfall and shut down, albeit permitted to run its course much too long, and stopped unfortunately, too late.

Friend of mine, sixty-years old, just got canned in the Northwest and he tells me that no one wants to hire him that they “are looking for the young bucks” and he is quite concerned about providing for the family and his lifestyle certainly has taken a new turn.

I read where women, single women, have very few “interview-worthy outfits” to wear and are actually on Craigslist advertising for donations seeking professional wear.  People actually asking for $1 or $2 donations to just stay in their homes, to hold their heads above water, desperately seeking a roof over her head for her and her two kids.

Country is changing, our social mores are on the forefront and life as we know it, has taken a turn down the proverbial path, and often, following it and understanding where it is leading us, is somewhat confusing and frustrating.

So we all rush out and we shower our loved one with an expensive dinner, gourmet chocolates, flowers and gifts galore, but all of these things are not going to be enough to conquer a weak economy.  I understand that this year, the arrows of cupid are costing about $20 less than last year anyway, so there is the rainbow, the silver lining in all this.

Believe it or not, in all of this, there seems to be one sure fire winner and that is the sale of condoms, they are up (pardon the pun) and as a crippled American economy saps the lifeblood out of most Americans this year, we continue to entertain ourselves at home.

Those of who have not lost them completely or been evicted here lately.

When I can think of some good news to write about I will be back.

OOO

You Don’t Smell Like Flowers (audio)

Filed under: Uncategorized — ldsrr91 @ 3:26 AM


You Don’t Smell Like Flowers


(Parody of You Don’t Bring Me Flowers by Barbara Streisand and Neil Diamond)

You don’t take a shower
You don’t put the seat down
You hardly cook for me anymore
When I come home from the bar
Where I spend half the day
And I remember when
Your manners didn’t bug me
You used to aim when you’d pee
Now after frank-n-beans late at night…
Well, I can’t hold it in
So I just let if fly
And it stinks like a meadow
Full of steaming cow pies
You could say excuse me
You could turn the fan on
You don’t smell like flowers anymore
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