Creative Endeavors, The Home of BoxcarOkie.com

January 22, 2009

Still Puttin Out

It’s Okay, we are all different … Remember that.

Today is my second day of being a “Media Whore” and I seem to be fine with it.  I do note this morning that an Australian tourist board is searching for someone to blog about living on an island in the Great Barrier Reef.  Applicants must be willing to live in an oceanfront villa, swim in the pool, snorkel the reef, and lie on the beach.  How much does it pay you ask?  The six month position pays $100,000.00 u.s.  Sign me up!  It sounds like a tough job, but someone is going to do it, might as well be me.

You Have To Be Kidding Me.

So here I sit, reading USA Today, page 2B, Thursday January 23rd, and there it is.  “HOW TO MAKE MILLIONS BUYING BAD LOANS” from your kitchen table (of all places) and now here comes the really good part … without spending a penny of your own money! And I am sorry, but I had to think to myself … Isn’t that how we got into the mess to begin with? The ad goes on to tell you about some kind of financial superman who made billions “after going broke” during the financial mess, and he can show you how to do the same. Pass.

Oh that?  You found about that did you?

You might find this amusing and you might not.  Treasury Secretary designate Timothy Geithner’s confirmation hit a snag this week, when they announced he was some $34K short in paying his income taxes plus interest.  Now let’s see, “you can not operate Turbo Tax and you are going to be put in charge of the U.S. Treasury.”  What is wrong with this picture?

Friday in the Big City.

Nothing out of the ordinary coming my way that I know of, and I seem to be holding up rather well.  The government is reporting that they have found “bird parts” on the USA flight that went down in the Hudson River, and divers have located the missing engine.  I don’t know a whole lot about most of this, but I know that if I am ever on a plane that goes down, I want Chesley B. “Sully” Sullenberger to be the pilot.

Man!  What a take charge guy that pilot seemed to be.  And low and behold, I have heard it for years, and it turns out to be true.  “In case of a water landing your seat will serve as a floatation device.”  In this case, it was the entire airplane.  Homeland Security has solved the crash and has released pictures of the culprits and you can view them here.

To be or not to be … that is the question — Opps, sorry about that.

A loaded gun was accidentally used during a rehearsal of a Florida play at a Senior Citizen Center and the bullet grazed the ear of another actor.  He was reportedly doing fine after being checked at a local hospital.

Give it back!  Dog-gone it Martha, give it back!

A New York man is suing his ex-wife for a kidney.  In 2001 when she was desperate for a kidney, he donated one of his to her, and now that they are divorcing he is demanding it back or she can buy it from him for a palsy $1.5 million dollars.  Good luck on that one.

Here is another victim of the bad economy for you.  It is now being reported that “lawyers” are having a tough go of it, as more and more Americans decide to stick together and ride it out. When you are fighting a case and have the facts on your side, hammer away at the facts.  If you have the law on your side, hammer away with the law.  If you live in Oklahoma and you are representing yourself, take the Okie defense — hammer away on the table.  No good huh?

Okay, wait, wait.

What if you are a lawyer and you go to the restaurant and you don’t like what they offer — Do you ask for a change of menu?

Yeah, I know, move on.

Things are getting pretty bad, Burger King offered a free Whopper to anyone who would un-friend 10 people from their Facebook accounts.  Some 200,000 people suddenly found themselves friendless in America.  And I stood there dumbfounded wondering why the line was so long.

Spit it out Pedro.

Zapatos after Mexico City launched a campaign urging citizens to swallow their gum rather than spit it on the street.  Officials there say the average square yard of sidewalk in the city has 70 globs of discarded gum.

Slow and steady … Slow and steady.

A friend of mine handed me a Rubik’s cube one night and showed me how it worked.  He then mixed it all up and said, “See if you can figure that one out?” and left me with it.  As I am a pilgrim of very little patience, about 72 hours later, I dropped it in the trash compactor and hit the button.  One very dead Rubik’s cube, much to the dismay of my friend.

A British man has finally solved the Rubik’s Cube after 26 years of trying.

Construction worker Graham Parker, now 45, first picked up the puzzle in 1983 at the peak of its global popularity, and though it stymied him, he kept at it obsessively after the world moved on.  “I have had wrist and back problems form spending hours on it” said Parker, “but it was all worth it.  When I clicked the last bit into place and each face was a solid color, I wept.”

You think that is bad, you ought to be a Media Whore in America and cannot locate your pimp.  Now that is rough.

What am I supposed to do for the rest of the day?

000

Care For Another? Loose Change.

Email of the week

Filed under: humor,Oklahoma,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 12:55 AM
Tags: ,

Every now and then I dream about a perfect world, a nice place, a gentle place and place where people just — Play Fair — It is my profound hope to live long enough to see that dream fulfilled.

Tonight I came in here and found this in the box:

As promised, I nominated you and your bloggie, for best written blog, in 2008. as seen here, today: http://okiedoke.com/ok/08awards/index.html and I’ve saved from my nominating email to Mike, Okiedoke, our conversation regarding same… and ‘less’.

Mr. Smith, you’ve proven to be a craving, media Whore, with your blog.  I cannot ever visit your site again, because I treat myself better than that which you offer there.  Best of luck, in winning the ‘Best writing’ category (sp) in the Okieblogs, with your self- cast, and singular vote.  As I confided to Mike, Okiedoke, the night I nominated your repetitive and predictably dry blog for the award,

“Under the catagory of “Best Writing Blog”, I nominate Mr. Don Smith, a.k.a. “Creative Endeavors Blog”.  It is my sincere wish that someday, Mr. Smith suddenly becomes both/either ‘Creative’, or shows some ‘Endeavor’ in his compositions.  Neither has occurred yet, but A promise is A promise….”

And of course, “Best Overall Blog”, I nominate Charles G., a.k.a. “Dustbury”. One too many (*meaning ‘two and more’) blogs wherein all you did was bitch.  that is so tiresome, old man; get a clue.  Your emails are herewith blocked~ Go to hell.

This person did not get nominated for his blog, that will remain unnamed for good reason.

So for the record, I am not a media whore, first off, I am paid nothing for this, so I don’t fit that definition.  Isn’t it curious, if this blog is so bad, and it cannot be tolerated, the writer still “nominated it.”

Duh?

Secondly, I don’t go around “nominating myself” for anything.  Being low maint. I have enough problems of my own, without going around generating even more of them.

I often try to put up something worthwhile and make an effort to make what I have to say interesting and informative.  We try to be honest.  We don’t want to manipulate the reader. I try my best to not play games.  We try to be passionate about the topic without being over emotional,

I really work on being able to keep my cool when others seem like they are angry, or losing their composure when they are hurt or at a loss for words.  And, I always enter the Clearing House Sweepstakes and I always manage to make the final cut according to either Dick Clark or Ed McMahon.

Believe it or not, fairness is important to me.  I try not to be bigoted, mean spirited, or downright nasty.  Having my fair allotment of phobia’s and fears, I usually reserve them to myself and do not post them publicly.

A man cannot come into your yard and steal your goat — if you do not tell him where you tie it up at night.

So what I am basically all about here lately is just getting the point across in the most productive and positive way I can imagine or find.  I used to write a Union Paper, and that is where I honed my writing abilities, I have been published several times in different formats.  Most writers are greatly successful and they often make movies of their works.  I really do not see that happening here.

I was once asked to star in a Remake of Midnight Cowboy, but had to turn it down because I go to bed before 9 pm.

Most everything else, because of the format we are using here, will have to remain “private” and I reserve the right to continue the mystery.  Plus, allowing certain people to know too much about yourself, in this day and age, can turn out to be downright unhealthy.

So when people come up to me and say, “Are you as witty, insightful, articulate, and as handsome as your writing suggests?”

I would have to reply “Uh, not really.  I am only five nine.”

000

Naysayer Clarion Call

Filed under: Oklahoma,politics,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 12:01 AM
Tags: , , , ,

As it is always our intention to make you (our readership) the best informed and the most positive group of internet subscribers, here are some statistics for you on the Bush Administration.

Please be forewarned that these are “real statistics” and they are NOT funny.

Here are the numbers from the market indexes and the national debt from when Bush took office through January 19th, 2009.  The national debt is from October 1st, 2001 when his first budget took effect up through last Friday.  His last budget will not end until September 30th, 2009.

Dow Jones Industrial Average January 20th, 2001:

  • 1/20/01—10,587.59
  • 1/19/09—8,281.22  Down 21.8%

S&P 500 Index January 20th, 2001:

  • 1/20/01—1,342.54
  • 1/19/09—850.12   Down 36.6%

NASDAQ January 20th, 2001:

  • 1/20/01—2,770.38
  • 1/19/09—1,529.33  Down 44.8%

National Debt September 30th, 2001:

  • 9/30/01—$5.807 Trillion
  • 1/16/09—$10.627 Trillion   Up 83%

(Bush’s last budget will not end until 9/30/09).

Meanwhile in an effort to curb the National Debt, a new federally mandated Novelty License Tag has been proposed by the Republican Party, as a way of remembering these stellar achievements in good government over the past several years.  The price will be $6.99 per tag and multiple orders will be shipped the same day, for free.  All proceeds are to go to the Federal Treasury or the first scum-bag banker or lobbyist that shows up.

NEW TAGS FOR THE YEARS UP AND UNTIL ’08

01. Bush: End of an Error
02. That’s OK, I Wasn’t Using My Civil Liberties Anyway
03. Let’s Fix Democracy in this Country First
04. If You Want a Nation Ruled By Religion, Move to Iran
05. Bush — Like a Rock — Only Dumber.
06. If You Can Read This, You’re Not Our President.
07. Of Course It Hurts: You’re Getting Screwed by an Elephant
08. Hey, Bush Supporters: Embarrassed Yet?
09. George Bush: Creating the Terrorists Our Kids Will Have to Fight
10. Impeachment: It’s Not Just Oral Sex Anymore
11. America: One Nation, Under Surveillance
12. They Call Him “W” So He Can Spell It
13. Whose God Do You Kill For?
14. Jail to the Chief — At Least Nixon Resigned
15. No, Seriously, Why Did We Invade Iraq?
16. Bush: God’s Way of Proving Intelligent Design is Full Of Crap
17. Bad President! No Banana.
18. We Need a President Who’s Fluent In At Least One Language
19. We’re Making Enemies Faster Than We Can Kill Them
20. Is It Vietnam Yet?
21. Bush Doesn’t Care About White People, Either
22. Where Are We Going? And Why Are We In This Hand Basket?
23. You Elected Him. You Deserve Him.
24. Dubya, Your Dad Shoulda Pulled Out, Too
25. When Bush Took Office, Gas Was $1.46
26. Pray For Impeachment
27. The Republican Party: Our Bridge to the 11th Century
28. What Part of “Bush Lied” Don’t You Understand?
29. One Nation Under Clod
30. Bush Never Exhaled

Not to be out done on this, the Democrats quickly announced that they are going to start in with their own project, decorative yard signs.  As you know in America, we have plenty of signs:  Stay off the Grass — No Smoking — Keep Out — Right on Red — Foreclosed/Out of business — I Never Had Sex With That Woman and they seem to work fairly well.

The Democrats are proposing for the low price of only $10.99 you can purchase a sign to put in your front yard that reads:  Murder Strictly Prohibited — No Raping People — Thank You For Not Kidnapping Anyone — No Water Boarding. (The last one comes in a plain brown wrapper and there is no return address on the package)

The Democrats are also contending that they will too have a list of Novelty lic. tags featured, they are going to start with Teddy Kennedy and Nancy Polsei work their way down, this will be announced later.

Get your orders in early and beat the rush (while you still have money) be the first person on your block to own the entire set.

000

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