- When you are a man …Wedding plans take care of themselves.
- You don’t need instructions, just patience
- When you get married your last name stays put.
- The garage is all yours
- Chocolate is just another snack.
- You can be President.
- You can scratch that what itches and not be all that worried about it.
- You can belch the entire alphabet.
- You can never be pregnant.
- You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
- You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
- Car mechanics tell you the truth.
- The world is your urinal.
- You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
- You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay.
- Wrinkles and children add character.
- Wedding dress $5,000.00
- Tux rental-$100.00
- People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them.
- New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
- One mood all the time.
- You don’t have to worry about being a “smart shopper.”
- Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
- You know stuff about tanks, how to lite a gas stove, air compressors.
- A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
- You can open all your own jars.
- You can scratch parts of your anatomy you haven’t seen in five years.
- You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
- If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
- Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
- Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
- You almost never have strap problems in public.
- You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
- Everything on your face stays its original color.
- The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
- You only have to shave your face and neck.
- You can play with toys all your life.
- One wallet and one pair of shoes — one color for all seasons.
- You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
- You can ‘do’ your nails with a pocket knife.
- You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache.
- You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
- Men should be Happier People .. And of course …I wonder why we expect so much from such simple creatures?
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