So I find myself sitting in a beanery waiting on the girl to bring my food and I feel lower than a snake. Kind of like the day that you lost your first bicycle or they chose you to dance with the tallest girl in the class on a rainy day in the Gymnasium.
One of those type of things.
Having just checked my stats for the day, I discover much to my dismay, only 36 people had come by and I am for some reason, beside myself, I cannot figure it out. Am I writing this thing for 36 people? It is eating me alive. I think about all these poor desperate souls on the internet lamenting the fact that no one ever comments on their stuff, that absolutely no one ever stops by their site.
Have I, by some bizarre twist of fate, become one of them?
A chill runs up my spine, the hair on the back of my neck gets stiff. Which is a quirky thing in itself, because that is about the only place I still have left that grows hair and also gets ……… I digress.
So I roll it over and over in my mind. I have this epiphany about it (my kid calls them brain farts), I distinctly remember all those tiny little red dots on my global map, and I say to myself, “No wait a minute, if I have all those red dots on the map, that HAS TO BE more than 36 people.” Suddenly, faster than a Hong Kong second, my faith in my abilities and mankind is restored.
My eggs and bacon arrive, she refills my coffee cup and all is well with my world. I am now free to pontificate in my particular dogmatic and often pompous way.
Life is good.
Texas gave preliminary approval this week to wind generation, which is certainly a positive step forward in our energy situation. PUC Commissioner Paul Hudson said Texas now leads the nation in wind power, and that with this deal, Texas “will add more wind than the 14 states following Texas combined.” As with everything in America, this is not going to be free, not by a long shot. It will cost consumers on the average about $4 a month more on their electric bills to fund the $4.9 million dollar project. The wind is “free” but the rest of it, well, ya’ll (Texas Term of endearment) have to pay for thet.”
Pass me another bowl of hairballs and grease. Mississippi, Alabama and Tennessee lead the nation when it comes to obesity. Or at least they’re “owning up to it” — Oklahoma could fit in there somewhere, but is more than likely being quiet about it. We have our fair share of corn fed heifers and good ol’ pot bellied-boys here in Sooner Land. I myself have been prone to purchase a “FBXLG” T-shirt from time to time. (Full Belly Xtra Large)
Last time I checked, we were rated the 47th most unhealthy place to live and were leading the nation in heart disease and a few other ugly nasty things that HMO’s just hate. You know what HMO stands for? “Hand Over Your Money Or Die.”
Local Malcontent is getting married … Nobody warned me, so I am not warning you! Hah! Congratulations are in order. Just one thing to remember … A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
Si Habla this. I have been ranting and raving for months about it, now finally some relief.
A trucker was issued a $500 ticket for not speaking English well. Believe it or not, Federal Law requires that anyone with a commercial driver’s license speak English well enough to talk with police. Evidently this guy didn’t possess that skill and was issued a citation. His attorney (your usual ACLU you just gotta love ‘em too death barrister) says that he is proficient in English on a “third grade” level. So I guess this would be tantamount to a toddler operating a 80,000+ Semi on the Interstate. You can read all about it here.
All this stuff going around about the late Heath Ledger and his performance (as the joker) in this movie currently out, the buzz about it possibly receiving an Oscar for the departed actor (suicide in New York a couple of months ago) well, that is just downright creepy.
Here is another one for the “Don’t Be A Dick Files.”
Andy Dick was arrested this week outside a bar in Murrieta, California after he pulled down a teenager’s top, police said. A 17-year old girl told police that Dick, 42, “grabbed her tank top and bra and pulled them down and exposed her breasts.” Police said that they found marijuana and Xanax in the comedian’s pockets and he is now facing charges of drug use and sexual battery.
Now what is a 17-year old girl doing in a bar in California anyway?
One more and then I am outta here. A grand jury has indicted State Senator John Cowdery on bribery and conspiracy in an outgoing federal investigation. The Alaska Senator has been involved with three former Alaska lawmakers and two oil executives.
Federal prosecutors allege Cowdery, 78, an Anchorage Republican, conspired with executives of the oil company, VECO, to bribe another unnamed senator with $25,0000 for votes to support oil and gas legislation in that state. Cowdery’s lawyer, said his client has not been arrested.
Which is kind of strange when you stop to consider it. “If you are not arrested, then why do you need a lawyer?”
78 years old, he should have known better. Arrested or not we do understand he has lost his “head of the line privileges at Star Bucks” this type of political chicanery cannot go unpunished.
There you go, “all the news that is fit for print, or causes fits in print.”
Oh yeah, this post today, marks a visible milepost for this blog, this is #301 for this year, a minor milestone or marker in time. it doesn’t seem that long, that it was just post #1 and setting out on a brand new adventure … Thanks so much for droppin’ by to share it with me.
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