Creative Endeavors, The Home of BoxcarOkie.com

December 17, 2014

Good News …

Filed under: Blogging,humor,Life,Oklahoma — ldsrr91 @ 12:36 PM
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Just got off the phone with the doctor, and he gave me some good news for a change.  He said my recent round of poking and prodding produced nothing of a significant nature and that I am okay.

Which after what I have been thru here lately is definitely a boost for me.

With six visits to the ER in the last two years and the operating room twice, it has taken a toll on the fuel fund, let me tell you.  Now I can sit back and take it in, one day at a time, without so much as a hint of anxiety.

So there is good news and there is bad.

First the good, the prognosis is great for a change, which is a most welcome relief. Now the bad, it appears that I am going to be around a little while longer.

So here is the game plan boys & girls … I plan on increasing my sarcasm by a measure of at least 18% and today I am going to town to celebrate with a BLT.

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December 16, 2014

You Have Mail …

Filed under: Blogging,humor,Life,Oklahoma — ldsrr91 @ 8:29 PM
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hanging-with-friends

Recently when Sony Corp. was hacked and embarrassing emails were leaked, it occurred to me that this could be the best thing to happen to this generation of conversation-challenged people. If sending a colorful, conversational or nasty email becomes a danger, then perhaps they will all have to start talking again. Me? I am not apologizing for nuthin, why should I start now.

Believe it or not, in Korea they are referred to as “The Tribe That Looks Down” because of their obsession with electronic devices.

Yesterday was National Chocolate Day, a day set aside for you to cover with Chocolate anything your heart desires. Please ladies, if you did take a picture of Harvey in his chocolate covered banana sling from Fredericks Of Hollywood, don’t post any pictures of it on FaceBook.

Turbulent time in the City of Angels … The family calls the police, they state that their brother is out of control and acting crazy. The police show up, the brother then attacks them with a hammer, the police shoot the brother and he dies. Now the family is all up in arms because they wanted the police to help their brother not shoot him.

So let me see, if you are cop and someone comes at you with a hammer, you are supposed to just stand there and take it?

I-dont-think-so.com

One more, a little bit closer to home and I am outta here.  Norman Oklahoma, “Police this morning discovered a body, wrapped in chains, hanging in a tree.” Foul play is suspected … Gee, do you think so?

Discover Channel interviewing a convict who killed his entire family and set the house on fire … “Why did you do it?” asked the interviewer.  Convict replies, “Well, they was all home.”

Thank God for prisons.

Let me know if you did not get the email.

Jus Sayin 1216

Filed under: Blogging,humor,Life — ldsrr91 @ 8:37 AM
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She had that sad look in her eyes,
I could tell she was upset
maybe it was depression
or
just the battle scars of time

Looking at her I said:
“If you need a shoulder to lean on baby, I am here for you.”
And she said
“No thanks.  The smell of Ben Gay waters my eyes.”

Often life is like that, you never know
what is coming down the pike

I was in the restaurant yesterday,
kind of crowded,
but I still found a good seat

At that time,
suddenly quite by surprise my stomach growled deep down inside
This feeling came over me and I knew
I desperately needed to pass some gas.

The music in the Cafe was really, really loud,
so I timed my gas with the beat of the music.
After a couple of songs,
I started to feel much better.

Finishing my coffee I looked around the room
and noticed that everyone was staring at me.

Then I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my I-Pod.

Man, I just hate it when that happens.

Jus Sayin

Under The Radar …

Filed under: Blogging,humor,Life,Recent — ldsrr91 @ 12:07 AM
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Okay, Okay … Everything is going along just purrrrrrfek.  The new Interstate section is now open and the traffic is moving smoothly, only takes me 35 minutes to get to the doctor’s office and the hospital.  No one flipped me off, and the wife didn’t have to re-load when I changed lanes, it is gonna be a good day.

Time to check in.  

They have this new hand scanner thing that identifies me and I don’t have a lot of paperwork to contend with, I am a happy camper.  A nice looking lady walks into the room and calls out “Number 28” which is my number and she leads me to a room.  

This is when I first see …. IT. 

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There I am introduced to this huge do-nut looking machine and a whole lot of gauges.  My anxiety level seems to surge looking at this thing that ought to be in a Star Wars feature, it is massive.

She tells me to disrobe and put on the free-flowing don’t look while he is walking away gown and some slippers. 

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Just to be on the safe side of the hospital attire scale, I snatch a second robe and cover up the first robe.  She sits down next to me and begins a series of questions.

Do you have or ever have questions:

Do you smoke
no
Do you drink
no
Do you cheat at cards
No
Do you trifle with other peoples women
no
Have you ever secretly watched Martha Stewart or Kathy Lee Gifford video’s
Absolutely not!

Do you have:

Heart Disease
Yes
Diabetes
Yes
High Blood Pressure
Yes
Cholesterol
Yes
Have you ever been operated on
Yes, six times
Recently
Yes

Do you currently have cancer?

That is when I lost it. 

Jeeze lady, you don’t think I have enough on my plate right now to say Grace over?

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I am now seriously considering moving to Asia and trying some acupuncture treatments, now that, looks interesting.

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December 15, 2014

No Post Today

Filed under: Uncategorized — ldsrr91 @ 6:45 AM

old geezerGoing To The Doctor

December 14, 2014

No Longer A King

Filed under: Bus Life,Life — ldsrr91 @ 12:17 PM
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imagesThis morning I understand that I have been displaced as the undisputed Mega Maniacal Bus Board King of BCM.  This saddens me to some extent, but not much.  I checked out of there a long time ago, and have since, found greener pastures and solace in life. 

ROS is now king, long live ROS.

These days I concentrate on the things I love.  My old bus, “Be ye not the first to try the latest, nor the last to cast the old aside” is what my grandmother used to tell me, something truly special about being the owner of an old hoopie that is no longer in production

The smell of fresh rain on a country road in the summertime.
Songbirds in the tree on the westside of the house
The view from the top of the hill at the Riverside in Laughlin Nevada.

The husky sound of a woman’s laugh in the dark.
Little children at play.
Long stretches of two lane at dusk
the sound of a big Detroit workin a hill outside of Bozeman
fresh popcorn poppin,
mis-spelled words in Bus Conversion Magazines

Setting the Jake and listening to her bark as she drops off the hill.
High-dollar fuel, bad roads, lousy weather, take the edge off life
Aluminum wheels and shaved rivets
crowded truck stops and radared chicken fry’s
polished wheels excite my senses

I like the look of Albuquerque New Mexico after dark from the top of nine mile hill …
Same with Las Cruces and The College Exit in Henderson Nevada.
Porpoising on the Interstate in Wyoming, running I-20 east out of Houston.

Winning lottery tickets
(Hey … This is my whimsical dream, remember that.)
“It’s all downhill from Van Horn Texas.”
(Yeah sure)

Diesel mechanics who smile and say, “Ah, this aint nuthin.”

Halter tops and cut off Levi’s
Bacon fryin and the smell of burnt toast in the kitchen
(There you go Paul!),
M&M commercials
No one in line ahead of me at the fuel desk
mashed potatoes and dark rich gravy

The smell of diesel exhaust early in the morning
a cup of fresh brewed coffee.
Country Music, Miranda Lambert, Carrie Underwood
NASCAR, CMT Video’s, old time Rock n Roll
long, slow wet kisses in the dark,
Stories told late at night around a dying campfire

Cracker Barrel stores
Chrome shops,
LED’s,
Stainless Steel
the wife humming softly at the kitchen sink
fried apples in thick syrup.

And last:

Meeting another truck on a hill late at night, and he says, “Aint nuthin’ back there driver but a whole lot of dark.” 

All that … is a Windy Winter Day slice of life … Some of it even makes me smile.   As I am now officially aware that I am no longer a King, I shall ply my trade as a humble serf in the bus board Kingdom and stumble happily thru life.

I mean, who need’s all that childish crap?

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Jus Sayin 1214

Filed under: Blogging,Holidays,Life — ldsrr91 @ 12:46 AM
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images-1What do you want for Christmas?
(Oregon blueberry pie doesn’t count Paul)

It really aint what you think it is
Two guys in a bus shop are talking,
and he says:
“We can press hard on her rear-end and that should button her up good.”
That one ….  And an empty box from Northern Tools
will stop the wife in her tracks for sure.

Two old ladies sitting on a park bench and one says:
“She is Patti’s daughter, she really isn’t all that C-U-T-E.”
Little girl turns around and says:
“Yes. But she is S-M-A-R-T.

Never thought I would say this, but NBC finally got one right.

Tonight they reported that “American’s took to the streets in protest over racial unrest in Ferguson Mo. and around the country.
They didn’t say “Afro-Americans” they said “Americans
because if you are from Ferguson or KC you aint Afro anything … You are homegrown bro.

Half of the hill behind your house is now in your living room
your Toyota Prius is buried under 6 ft of rocks and mud
there is nowhere on the street to put the trash can out on Friday
and the man looks straight into the camera and says,

“Don’t worry. This is our fourth time, we will rebuild.”

You just gotta love a Californian.

Jus Sayin

No post tomorrow, going to the doctor.

December 13, 2014

Jus Sayin 1213

Filed under: Blogging,humor,Life — ldsrr91 @ 8:37 AM
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unknown8
I hate doing this, but it seems that I must. No name calling is permitted at all. We are all grownups and each of us is expected to act like it. Just because someone uses a name that you feel is not correct doesn’t mean they are wrong. We will not put up with this kind of behavior at all.
 

So if I were to say, “I don’t like that guy he is a dirty-egg sucking dog.” 

That would not be allowed because it is offensive to the dog?

Nine times outta ten, when someone says 
“I hope you don’t mind me saying this but …”
You are going to mind.

Then when you do muster up the courage to say it, you get:

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Story of my life

Jus Sayin

Why I Don’t Like LuvRbus …

Filed under: Blogging,Bus Life,humor — ldsrr91 @ 7:18 AM
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Catchy title eh?  That is called “The Hook” it is intended to get you to at least look, and then the rest of it (keeping your interest) is up to the hack that is writing it.

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So here we go …. Why I don’t like LuvRbus.   

Cliff Allen knows more than me in several areas of life b’sides just buses.  He lives where it is warm.  He points out the obvious, what he considers right and wrong, and takes the heat when those who are doing the right and wrong don’t like it.

Bus 029

Another thing I don’t like is it seems he is the real deal, he isn’t a cheap bus community poser or wanna-be type of fellow.  Unfortunately for LuvRbus that irks posers and wanna-be’s.

What does a bus poser actually do other than dream of doing something, owning something, attending something, getting elected to something.   What would they do with their time when they were done cutting and posting on the Internet, or opining on all the material that other people put up? (posers seldom contribute they just criticize) 

What would the profile of a bus poser look like? 

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Here is a well intentioned guess. 

The bus poser wanna-be bus nut expert guy seldom actually gets out on the American Highway.  With the current cost of high priced fuel, maxed out credit limits on his VISA card, it pretty likely he will seldom leave his home state or actually attend a bus meet, even when it is only 150 miles away.  First one to announce that he will “be there for sure” and then beg’s off with some lame excuse at the last moment and never shows.

He sits in the comfort of his favorite easy chair, with his Rand McNally and dreams and schemes of trips yet to be taken.  Over a very short period of time he becomes a bus nut guru of sorts in his little make believe universe.  (get three of them together and you have a qualified expert on any given subject in the world)

Always the first to comment and the last word belongs to him … His stuff is the best in the west.  He knows the cheapest cost of everything, but regrettably, the value of nothing.  As Frank Burns on Mash used to say … “It’s lonely at the top.”

Sadly it is not easy being numero uno these days but someone has to do it. Clifford tries, it is even rumored that, “he is number one on a lot of people’s lists.” Strangely, this is something that a lot of us have aspired to all our lives … that … and bowling a perfect game.  Which of course is but a dream.  You and I will never bowl a perfect game, I know for a fact, it is completely out of my reach.

There is always hope.  Some of us could very well achieve the lofty status of a LuvRbus someday on a bus board.  In my case, all I have to do is learn how to baffle them with BS, because I sure don’t have a lot of what some would consider brilliance.

Bus 031-1

There might be a spot in the sun for Clifford and at the same time for me.  

Recently I discovered, quite by accident, two places available for us to store our BS.  One is called “Google” and another is some animal named “The Cloud?”  There is this other thing called a “Drop Box” but it has nothing to do with rear-ends and buses. 

Still here?  

Okay, there is more (there is always going to be more) Clifford and I share some common traits, we are both good looking, we are outspoken, we have buses and neither one of us knows when to shut up.  Personally, I am going to keep on being the guy I am, because I cannot be Clifford, and I know it would be wasting the me that I already am. 

Most likely none of this will never happen because we both get easily distracted while we sit patiently in our assigned chairs in God’s Waiting Room and watch the parade of life roll by.  Now sit back and relax, another great post is coming your way here on Creative Endeavors, The Home of Boxcarokie.com where we play all of the hits, and print all the news that causes fits, every day.

“Hey look Cliffy … There goes a squirrel!”

DS

Footnote:  I ran this by one guy to make sure it was “venom proofed” and he replied with this:  And he’s owned nearly every make, model, and type of equipment.  Anything with an internal combustion engine. He’s run ‘em and worked all night to fix ‘em just so’s he could pay for them.  Oh, yeah for the last 50 years! He’ll help anyone who needs it and asks.  Will keep his mouth shut when he disagrees, unless asked or has had enough and then it’s both barrels, unfiltered and unvarnished … Duck Commander style!

So I guess it is alright.  Knowing the general nature of bus boards,social media and the Internet, I am sure if it isn’t, I will hear about it eventually.

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Jus Sayin 1211  
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December 12, 2014

All Tanked Up

Filed under: Blogging,Oklahoma — ldsrr91 @ 12:01 AM
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Looking down and checking the gauges and everything looks normal, volts are up, temps are down and the fuel gauge just a notch off of full.  Reaching over to the dash, I grab a fresh stick of bubble gum out of the pink carton which is lying on top of the Flyin Hooker fuel card next to my wallet.

Suddenly a wave of sadness rolls over me like a hot summer breeze.  All summer long I have been spoon feeding the fuel card, a hundred here, fifty there, give up a couple of twenties and now there it lies.

Like a three day old dead fish.  Spent.  Empty.  D.O.A. at the next pump it finds.  The needle wiggles a little just under “full” and we head west.

Fortunately the weather is nice, not a lot of wind, lite traffic.  Caffeine Free Diet Coke in the drink tray and a fresh stick of gum, I am good for a hundred miles at least.  Nothing like a full tank, groceries in the box, and the road she calls to me like a lover in the dark.

Today is much better than yesterday, yesterday was a little shop of horrors and not a whole lot of interstate fun.  First the left lane was shut down in fifteen hundred feet for what appeared to be “no reason at all.”  Then some idiot freight hauler who very much intent on getting into the lane I was occupying pushes his way into my world.

So I let him in, this monkey fresh outta the truck driving academy.  Where they taught him how to double clutch (not, most freight haulers are running air shift/automatic’s these days) showed him how to jack-knife and bump the dock (again … most likely will leave it in some company lot) and cheerfully assigned him a super secret CB Code name (which also doesn’t make sense because he is gonna be on a cellphone most of the time).

He comes over without so much as a thank you.  Don’t you just hate it when everyone wants to play “Who has the best insurance.”

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Now the road funnels down to what I call “kind of skinny,” a hard concrete barrier on the right. Backing down on the throttle, I ease over to the left and start taking my fair share out of the middle.   Which is not making me a lot of friends in the trucking community behind me at the time.

Some would consider this maneuver a little bit rude at best, but there is a valid reason.

The last time this happened, I tried to be a “good buddy” and share it all with them, and they in turn tried to bully me into the concrete barrier which we all know is not a good deal.  So now, I take my share out of the middle, I meet the legal limits for construction areas and if they do not like it, then I guess they can call someone about it.

But no, they would rather imply on the C.B. that my parents were never married (which I usually turn off early in the game anyway) and threaten me with mortal harm.  Meanwhile we just motor along and I think to myself … Are we having fun yet?

Eventually the road opens up, I signal a right turn and head into the Pokie Okie lane and three hard chargers come roaring by, and indicate to me that Old Eagle Buses are #1 this day in the Land of Enchantment.  I just smile and crank up the CD Player.

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Six O’clock PM … I need to hunt some parking, wife wants to watch Dancin’ With The Stars  and I am gonna cop me some rest.  I am so glad that VISA raised my limits and my therapist changed my anxiety meds, this is gonna be the best Christmas yet.

Have a good weekend, watch them right handers.

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